Visitation
by radiofreeamy
Summary: AH-AU What if Edward reacted violently while saving Bella that night at Port Angeles? Can Edward and Bella find themselves and love while Edward is incarcerated?
1. Chapter 1

The courtroom was cold and for a moment I regretted not listening to Charlie. I tugged at the sleeves of my sweater, covering my hands to warm them. He didn't want me to come; he didn't want me to be reminded of what had happened that night in Port Angeles.

I remembered our interaction from this morning.

"_Bells, you don't have to do this. You've been through enough," he pleaded as I climbed in my old Chevy truck._

"_I _have_ to do this Dad. Someone has to be there for him. He doesn't have anyone else."_

"_This never should have happened to you, Bella." _

_He wouldn't look me in the eye. No one ever did when they brought up that night—that night that I was attacked._

"_Well Charlie, it _did_ happen and I'm not going to turn my back on him. I'll see you when I get back." _

_The door creaked as I slammed it closed. It took three tries before the engine came to life. Gravel crunched as I backed out of the driveway and I waved goodbye to Charlie._

_He still wouldn't look at me._

There were only a handful of people in the courtroom, with the families of the victims comprising the majority. I had a hard time thinking of those men as _victims._ Their snarling faces haunted me in my dreams; I could still smell their beer flavored breath. My body shivered in reaction to my thoughts.

"Bella, are you ok?" Jacob asked as he rubbed my shoulder. He didn't really want to be there but had insisted I that I must not travel to Port Angeles on my own. Jacob was my only friend in the raining mini-metropolis known as Forks, Washington.

"I'm fine, Jake. Just cold."

He frowned, but continued rubbing my shoulder. "We can leave, you know." Lowering his voice in anticipation of an argument, he added, "There really isn't any reason for you to be here."

"Jake, I've told you a thousand times: I need to be here. This is the only way I can thank him."

Jake tightened his lips with disapproval. He didn't understand the reason I was so invested in being here for this man. No one did.

It was my fault that Edward Masen was on trial for murder.

Lifting my head at the sound of a door opening, I scanned the front of the courtroom to find Edward being led in, sandwiched between two officers escorting him towards the defendant's table. He was dressed in the same suit he had worn throughout the trial; dark gray to match my mood. The suit jacket was too short at the sleeves, emphasizing the length of his lean arms. His necktie was blue and though it wasn't ugly, it certainly looked outdated . . . I wondered if the clothes were his or if they were donated.

Even with his ill-fitting suit, he was still extremely handsome. His hair was neatly combed, as it had been every morning of the trial. However, by the end of the day his hair would have a mind of its own, endearingly sticking up in all directions. He seemed to have a habit of rubbing his hands through his hair, making it appear wild and unruly. I wondered if he always did that when he was nervous; I wondered a lot of things about this man. Actually, he wasn't yet a man. Edward was only seventeen.

When I caught a glimpse of the shackles binding his hands and feet, my stomach clenched in anger. Why did the authorities felt the need to shackle him—weren't handcuffs equally effective? The chains undoubtedly made him look more like a criminal, as if they wanted to make him out to be some sort of monster. He sat down at the table with a hopeless sigh as the guard removed the offending metal from his wrists and ankles. Absentmindedly rubbing his wrists where the cuffs had been tightly clasped, he then on cue ran one hand through his hair. His lawyer leaned over and whispered something in his ear and he nodded. A few moments passed before he turned his head to scan the courtroom, appearing as if he was searching for someone.

He met my gaze and stopped. Our eyes locked for what seemed like an eternity. His golden-brown eyes were sad, with dark circles underneath. I had so much I wanted to say to him, but all I could do was stare back until he silently turned away.

A minute later the prosecutors from the District Attorney's office entered the room and sat down at their table. They looked so together, so professional; a far cry from Edward's disheveled attorney, whose baby face gave away his inexperience. I figured the attorney had been court-appointed and I wouldn't be surprised if this was his first trial. It was like the stars were aligned against Edward Masen, and I couldn't help feeling like I was the one who set this whole tragedy in motion.

The jury filed in slowly to the juror's box, and I studied each face in turn, trying to glean any hint about Edward's impending sentence. Unfortunately the jurors either averted their eyes or sat with stone-cold expressions, and I became immediately filled with dread.

We rose from our seats as the judge entered the room.

"You may be seated," he announced.

I tremulously followed his instruction, desperately hoping that the outcome would not be as bad as I feared.

The jury had deliberated for two days and had come to a decision. Today Edward would discover his fate.

The judge cleared his throat.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I understand you have reached a verdict in this case?" He looked expectantly toward the jury box.

A plump, older woman with gray hair stood. I assumed she was the jury foreman.

"Yes, your honor. We have."

The judge nodded at the woman to continue. She opened a manila folder and began reading aloud.

"The state of Washington, plaintiff, vs. Edward Anthony Masen, defendant.

Case number 53122.

We the jury in the above and titled case find the defendant, Edward Anthony Masen, as follows:

Count 1, Voluntary Manslaughter: Guilty.

Count 2, Voluntary Manslaughter: Guilty.

Count 3, Voluntary Manslaughter: Guilty.

Dated this fifth day of July, 2006."

I closed my eyes and placed my head in my hands. I knew this would probably happen, but actually hearing the harsh word "Guilty" seemed so final. The family members of the victims were celebrating, giving high fives, and smiling.

I glanced at Edward and his face was emotionless. He looked much younger than his seventeen years, like a lost little boy. My heart was breaking for him.

He may have killed those three men, but he did it to save me.

The Judge was speaking, but I had blocked him out. Apparently, he was about to announce Edward's punishment.

I had done research on the internet, discovering that he could receive a maximum of forty-five years in prison for the three counts of manslaughter. I quickly performed the mathematical calculations in my head. If given a full sentence, he would be sixty-two years old when he would be released. Of course there was a chance he could get out early on good behavior, but I'm sure he would still have to serve at least twenty years. I felt sickened realizing that the prime of his life could be spent behind bars. I kept my fingers crossed, praying that the judge would be lenient.

"Mr. Masen, do you have anything to say before I hand down your sentence?" The judge asked.

Edward shook his head, his gaze dropping to the floor in front of him.

"Mr. Masen, I've put a lot of thought into your sentence. On one hand, you ended the life of three men. On the other, you prevented the violent rape and potential murder of a young woman. I know your personal history—I know you've had a hard life and have endured horrors I wouldn't wish on anyone. I don't think locking you away until you are an old man is going to help anyone. I see good in you and hope that you can be rehabilitated, to become a successful member of society."

He paused before continuing.

"I hereby sentence you to Meyer Juvenile Detention Center in Edmonds, Washington until you reach the age of twenty-one. You will then be on intensive probation for an additional fifteen years. I'm giving you a second chance, Mr. Masen. This sentence is contingent on you incurring no infractions during your stay in Edmonds. It is also contingent on you obeying the terms of your probation once you are released. If you violate these terms, you will be resentenced and will spend the next twenty-five years in a state penitentiary."

The judge paused, looking at Edward. "Do you understand these terms, Mr. Masen?"

"Yes, sir," Edward replied.

The Judge then motioned to the two officers, who reattached Edward's shackles and led him out of the courtroom. As he passed by me, he met my eyes again.

I silently mouthed "I'm sorry" as he disappeared through the door.

The trial was over. Angry voices rose from the plaintiff's side, and I could tell that the families of the victims were not pleased with the judge's verdict.

Jake nudged my arm; I had almost forgotten he was there with me. "Come on Bells; let's go home."

We made our way to my truck and when Jake offered to drive, I let him. We were silent as we traveled the hour trip back to Forks. It was raining now, and I leaned my head against the cool window, analyzing all that had happened today.

Edward would only serve four years, and it was in a juvenile center—not a real prison. I was grateful for that. I shuddered at the thought of what could happen to a handsome, young man like him in prison. It would be a fate worse than death. He would be much safer where he was going.

Glances stolen in the courtroom were the only interaction I had exchanged with Edward since he had saved me. I really wanted to thank him in person; to talk to him. I wanted to get to know this mysterious young man.

Edmonds was only three hours away from Forks. From what I had heard, Edward was a ward of the state and had been staying in a foster home with several other kids. I wondered if anyone would care enough to visit him.

I made my mind up at that moment. I was going to Meyer Detention center to visit Edward Masen.


	2. Chapter 2

EPOV

The sudden flash of bright light startled me out of my fitful slumber. Momentarily blinded by the brightness, I blinked furiously, waiting for my eyes to adjust. Another day in paradise, I thought. Same shit, different cell. I ran my hands through my disheveled hair and then tried to wipe the sleep from my eyes. I figured it was around six a.m., but I couldn't be sure. My watch had been taken away when I was arrested and there was no clock on the sterile, white cinderblock walls of my new cell.

I sat up, cautiously taking in my surroundings for the fist time. It had been lights out already when I had arrived last night and I had nothing to do besides go straight to bed, collapsing from the emotional strain of my sentencing; the emotional strain of watching Bella Swan react to my conviction of murder.

I tentatively pushed the rough sheet and itchy blanket away from my chin, uneasily removing the protective covers, and unfolded myself out of my sorry excuse for a bed. It was just a thin mattress lying on a concrete slab. Evidently the state didn't really care about prisoners' comfort. This was punishment, after all.

My cell was small; I figured it was about eight by eight. The room consisted of the bed, a small desk built into the wall, and a silver toilet/sink combo in one corner. In front of the desk there was a small pillar of concrete rising from the floor, meant to serve as a chair. It wasn't the Ritz, but it was a vast improvement over my home for the last few months.

The Port Angeles jail had felt like Grand Central Station with inmates incessantly streaming in and out; a revolving door of society's losers and derelicts. I always shared a cell with at least three other people and sometimes twice that number. There were only four beds per cell, so I often slept curled up in a corner. It had been important that I not draw attention to myself—placing a young guy like me in a room with hardened criminals was like throwing meat to a pack of hungry wolves . . . growling, starving, predatory wolves.

Understandably I was grateful that I wouldn't be sharing a cell with anyone. After years in group homes and then jail, I had never actually had a room to myself until now. Go figure—it took getting thrown into Juvie to get my own room. Basically my whole life had been spent sleeping with one eye open, in an attempt to protect myself from the monsters who wanted to hurt me. The monsters usually won.

I used the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I sighed at my reflection in the mirror; my hair was freaking all over the place. I hadn't had a haircut since before I was arrested, and it was longer than it had ever been. When I was a little kid, my dad had always kept my hair military style just like his. I hoped they didn't require buzz cuts here, because the last thing I wanted was to be reminded of the man who was responsible for both creating and destroying me.

I slipped my grey prison-issued jumpsuit over my tighty-whities and t-shirt. I snapped the buttons and slipped on my plain sneakers. The clothing and dorky white shoes certainly confirmed my belief that prison was hardly known for its trendy fashion.

I made my bed, taking care to pull the corners tight, smoothing out any wrinkles. Another habit for which I could thank dear ole dad. I scowled at the realization that I had thought of him twice in one day. Enraged, I immediately ripped off the sheets and threw them across the room. "Get the fuck out of my head!" I shouted to no one. I sighed and tried to push away the anger. I just wish I could erase him from my memory; it would make things so much easier. I regretfully glanced at the mess I had created with my fury, and was bothered by the disorder of it all. I silently remade my bed, not stopping until it was perfect.

I didn't have any personal effects, so there was really nothing for me to do until the correctional officers came to get me. Failing to detect a slot in the door for food trays, I figured I would be escorted to breakfast within the hour.

I sat down on the concrete chair and leaned over the desk, resting my head on my hands. I let my mind wander and smiled as I thought about the one thing that brought joy to my life: Bella Swan.

She had moved to Forks back in January. Forks is a small town, and the High School had been all abuzz over the new girl. She had moved from somewhere in Arizona to come live with her dad, the Forks Police Chief. I'd always kept to myself and did not really have many friends, so I didn't allow myself to get swept up in the excitement.

The first time I saw Bella was when she came and sat at my lab table during fifth period Biology. I scowled at her as she sat down; the last thing I needed was some dramatic, high-maintenance girl as my lab partner. Girls were an enigma to me and I always failed miserably when it came to interacting with the female species. I didn't get a good look at her till she sat down. Damn, I groaned to myself. Bella Swan wasn't just any girl; she had to be the most beautiful girl I had ever laid eyes on. This couldn't be good. Not only would I be my normal socially awkward self, but I would probably be drooling all over my shirt like some of the Special Ed kids.

She caught me scowling in her direction when she turned to smile at me. Needless to say, I blew my chance at making a good first impression. She turned away from me, looking hurt and confused. All I could do was put my head on my desk and pray for the class to end quickly.

It took a few days before I worked up the nerve to introduce myself to her. I'm not a man of many words, but I knew it was getting to the point of just being rude as hell. I had to take a chance and speak to the girl; hoping I wouldn't do anything to further embarrass myself.

Surprisingly, once I finally let myself speak to her, I found her rather easy to talk to. We were both shy but seemed to be able to draw each other out somehow. After attempting to discuss shallow, meaningless topics with the garden variety Forks High School airhead, I was pleased that Bella appeared to be my intellectual equal. It was a pleasure to work with her in Bio lab and I really felt we were on the road to becoming friends. She was quite a nice girl and I would be a liar if I didn't admit that I was completely smitten with her. I knew she would never be interested in a kid like me, but a guy could dream, right?

For the first time in a very long time, I was happy about something. And then Port Angeles happened.

The door to my cell opened suddenly, breaking me from thoughts of Bella.

A man in a black correctional officer uniform entered my cell and met my eyes. His hulking form blocked the light from the hallway, and my eyes widened, taking in his size. He was well over six feet tall, with dark curly hair and steely brown eyes. He was built like an NFL player and I felt quite sure he could break me in half with his bare hands.

"Good morning, Mr. Masen and welcome to your first day at Meyer Detention Center. My name is Officer Cullen and I'm in charge of getting you settled in here. I understand you got in rather late last night and didn't have a chance to go through new inmate orientation?"

"Yes sir. I was led straight to my cell."

Officer Cullen glanced down at his clipboard and made a notation.

"Unfortunately they didn't have your paperwork ready last night, so we will need to start from the top. The first thing I'll need to do is search you to make sure you didn't bring any contraband in on your person."

I gasped when I saw him pull out a pair of rubber gloves. Oh God, no, I silently cried as I unconsciously backed away from this giant man. He glared at me and motioned me over to the far wall.

"Masen, I'll need you to remove your clothes and place your hands above your head on the wall. If you cooperate, I promise to make this quick."

I did what he asked and slipped out of the uniform I had just put on. My heart-rate had increased dramatically and I knew I was moments away from having a panic attack. I fought to keep my breathing under control as Officer Cullen ran his hands up my body.

"Back away from the wall and bend over please."

I bent over and closed my eyes, fighting to keep the tears from flowing. I was overcome by the humiliation of having my most private places violated by a complete stranger. The tears were flowing freely now and I was having trouble catching my breath. The officer was true to his word and was finished within a few seconds.

I heard the sound of the gloves being removed and then I felt his hand on my arm.

"It's over now; you can stand up."

I walked over to the bed and sat down, trying to slow my breathing. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes, feeling utterly disgusted with myself for being so weak. I had lost it in front of a CO., and I hated to think of the laughs he and his fellow officers would share at my expense later. They probably had bets on how quickly they could break the new fish.

I grabbed my clothes and began putting them back on, refusing to meet the Officer's eyes until he spoke again.

"Masen, are you ok?" I could swear he sounded concerned. I paused, not knowing how to answer the question.

"Look, I'm sorry about that. I hate doing it, but sometimes we get some really bad kids in here who will hide drugs and weapons anywhere they can."

I nodded and continued dressing. When I was finished I stood up and walked towards the door. Officer Cullen put out his arm to stop me, shooting me a knowing glance.

"Hey Masen, why don't you take a second and wash your face or something; your eyes are still a little red. Nobody needs to know what happened in here. You're the new kid so I'll give you the heads-up that there are inmates out there who will eat you alive if they see any sign of weakness. There's no need to give them any motivation."

He surprisingly smiled and waited patiently while I blew my nose and wiped my eyes with a cool washcloth. After a few minutes I looked pretty much like my normal self. Officer Cullen led me out the door and into the cafeteria.

Since it was my first day here, Officer Cullen would be spending the day with me, showing me around, telling me all the rules, and getting me settled into Meyer. He sat with me at breakfast and explained how things worked here. Since I was a juvenile I would be required to attend classes during the day to work toward my GED. He had read my file and said that with grades like mine, I could probably sit for the GED whenever I wanted. He informed me that if I was interested I could take some online courses through the local community college. Apparently there had been a few inmates that had received associates degrees while incarcerated and then went on to go to university after being released. He kept stressing to me that Meyer really prided itself as being a place that rehabilitated the boys that came here. "It's not all about punishment here, Mr. Masen," he informed me.

I was starting to feel slightly less tense and panicked about my incarceration. I enjoyed school and felt quite sure I could pass the GED without studying. Soon it would be time for the fall semester to start and I would love nothing more than to take classes. Hopefully college work would be more challenging than mind-numbing high school.

I would be expected to have a job while I stayed here, and it could be anything from working in the cafeteria to filing books in the library. Officer Cullen said he would give me a list of open positions in order to help me find something that would work for me.

There were sports available to play on certain days if I was interested, as well as a television lounge. He mentioned that there was a music room and a volunteer that came one day a week to teach music lessons. I was thrilled to learn there was a piano available. My mother, who was passionate about music, had taught me how to play when I was small. After she died and the state placed me into the foster care system, I rarely had the opportunity to play. I hoped I would be able to continue my lessons here.

Officer Cullen made sure I understood that I had to walk the line and stay out of trouble to gain access to the "fun stuff" available here. He said there was a zero tolerance policy for insubordination of any kind, and he let me know that I would receive demerits for the infractions I committed. For example, if a C.O. overheard me using profanity, I would receive one demerit. I could work off demerits by performing work service around the detention center or going to classes like anger management, etc. If I collected more than twenty-five demerits I would lose privileges, and if I got more than one-hundred then I had to stay in solitary confinement until I was able to work off enough to reenter the general population.

He said that most kids here had no problem keeping out of trouble, but there were a few bad apples and it would be in my best interest to avoid them. He pointed to a kid named James across the cafeteria from us. Apparently James was the juvie badass; the one person I should avoid. "That kid is bad news, Masen. He will only bring you trouble. Stay away from him and whatever you do, don't make him an enemy."

The rest of my day consisted of my entrance medical exam and drug screen. I would be tested randomly, but I wasn't worried since I had never done any drugs. I was deemed medically fit for juvie and then Officer Cullen gave me the grand tour of Meyer Detention Center. We walked through the different cell blocks and classrooms, ending in the visitation room, which consisted of several round tables and chairs where inmates were allowed to meet with their loved ones from the outside. We were permitted visitors for one hour on Wednesdays and Saturdays. I couldn't imagine anyone other than my lawyer ever coming to see me. My last foster mother had her hands full with three other kids, all of whom had behavioral and emotion problems. She had liked me well enough, but I had never allowed our relationship to really blossom into anything deep.

I briefly imagined Bella Swan waiting for me in the visitation room, and my face momentarily brightened at the image. Then I sighed, knowing deep in my soul that my actions that night in Port Angeles may have saved her life, but would keep me from ever really getting to know her. I was sad that I would never see Bella again, but I didn't regret killing those monsters that were going to hurt her. I would kill them a million times over if it meant Bella was safe. As Officer Cullen led me away from the visitation room, I grimly realized that I still had over 1200 days left at Meyer Detention Center.

]


	3. Chapter 3

BPOV

To say I was furious would be putting it mildly. I was angry at those creeps for attacking me in Port Angeles; I was enraged at the powers that be for locking Edward up; and mostly I was frustrated with myself for idiotically rushing things, effectively wasting a day of precious free time. I was now making the three-hour trip back to Forks from Meyer Detention Center, bereft. Seeing Edward hadn't been in the cards today and it was all my fault.

Visiting Edward was a trip I had been looking forward to all week. Charlie was going fishing, blessedly leaving me home alone all day for the first time since my attack. I had assured him for weeks that I was fine and that he could resume his normal weekend activities. He had politely refused and had pretty much annoyed me with his constant presence all summer.

I finally convinced Jacob and his dad, Billy, to get Charlie out this weekend by playing the concerned daughter card. "Charlie really misses fishing, but he feels guilty for what happened to me. Can you guys take him out on the boat and give him a weekend to forget all the bad stuff? I really think he needs this." I gave them my best pouty look and batted my eyelashes furiously.

Suckers. They were completely fooled by my concern for Charlie's wellbeing. It took a little convincing, but Charlie finally agreed to go. They had left before dawn this morning and wouldn't return until late tonight. Now I had my chance to go and visit Edward.

I had researched the Washington State Division of Prisons website and saw that visiting hours were on Wednesdays and Saturdays from ten a.m. until two p.m. Each prisoner was allowed up to one hour of visitation per day. I had pulled up the directions from mapquest and excitedly printed them, hiding them in my room, anxiously waiting for Saturday to arrive.

Finally Saturday dawned and I had left the house around 6:00 in the morning. The directions said it would take three hours to get there, but I knew my truck couldn't go above fifty miles-per-hour, so I figured I should add thirty minutes just to be safe. Plus I needed to allow for extra time in case I got lost, wanting to make sure I got my full hour with Edward. I had no idea what we would talk about for sixty whole minutes, but I'm sure we would think of something. We never seemed to have trouble talking in Biology class.

I smiled at the memory of Edward and me in Biology. I can still remember the first time I saw him. He had taken my breath away. However, I seemed to have a somewhat different effect on him initially.

I had moved to Forks from Phoenix back in January. My mom had remarried and I had surmised that she would be happier if I wasn't around. She loved me, no doubt about it, but she had stayed single my entire childhood and I figured she finally deserved some alone-time with her new husband. And off the record, our house had become a twenty-four hour PDA zone. I could only take so much of my mom and Phil kissing and groping each other in my presence, and I knew there was no chance of that type of thing happening at Charlie's house. I would be in college soon, so I figured I could tough it out for less than two years in the cold wetness known as Forks, Washington.

Still, I wasn't thrilled about moving and didn't look forward to starting all over again at a new school. My old high school back in Arizona was huge, but I had found my small niche of friends, feeling more than content with the eclectic bunch. Now I would be moving to a school that enrolled fewer students than my entire ninth grade class. There were no secrets in small towns like Forks; I was sure everyone at Forks High had known each other since birth. I would be a novelty here and I didn't anticipate playing the role of the shiny new toy. Flying under the radar, my favorite type of travel, simply wouldn't be possible here.

I hadn't even exited my truck before the unofficial Forks High welcoming committee approached and engulfed me. By the time I entered the school I had already had three boys offer their assistance in finding my classes or showing me around Forks. From their close contact and "accidental" brushes against me, I could detect that they were interested in more than just showing me to my classrooms. I felt like a piece of meat and hoped their infatuation over the new girl would fade fast. I had zero experience with boys and the Forks boys' cloy smothering hardly brooked further interest in the male gender. Well, that was until I walked into fifth period Biology.

The first thing I noticed was his hair. I can't say I had ever seen hair that shade before; it was almost bronze in appearance. Thick and full, it was very messy in an organized kind of way. It was the kind of hair that just screamed "run your hands through me!" and I wanted to do just that. I felt like I had won the lottery when the teacher told me to sit next to the boy with that lovely hair. I slid onto the stool and turned to him, hoping to catch a glimpse of his face. He was absolutely gorgeous with lovely green eyes and a sexy squared jaw-line, wearing dark jeans and a fitted gray t-shirt. This boy deserved to be gracing the cover of an Abercrombie and Fitch catalogue, not sitting next to plain old me in high school Biology.

I smiled in his direction, meeting his eyes, and was shocked to see that he was scowling at me like I was a leper. Dismayed, I quickly turned away, wondering what on earth I could have done to offend this boy I'd never even met before. I discreetly checked to see if I had offensive body odor, but was only met with the light fragrance of my perfume and deodorant. I couldn't think of any reason for him to dislike me. We hadn't even been introduced yet!

Miserably, he never spoke or acknowledged me in any way during the entire class. I would occasionally glance in his direction, using the strands of hair softly falling across my face as a shield. I couldn't control the need to take in his hotness, but didn't want him to know I was visually stalking him during class. He eventually laid his head on the desk and sighed, and the moment the bell rang he was out the door at the speed of light. I grimaced, realizing that he could not get away from me fast enough.

Of course some blonde guy named Mike offered to walk me to my next class. Although I politely declined, the persistent boy kept at me by trying to persuade me to hang out with him after school at the diner. I had already tuned him out, wondering why the only boy I wanted to talk to seemed to think I was so horrible. The only explanation I could drum up was that I must look like an evil ex-girlfriend or something. I decided just to brush it off; figuring he was probably taken. I knew that someone with such unremarkable looks as myself would never have a chance with a boy that stunning anyway.

It took several days before Edward actually spoke to me. And when he did, I was shocked by how nice he was. He was so different from the scowling boy I had first encountered. He politely introduced himself and apologized for being so rude. Honestly, the moment I heard his smooth, deep voice, he was instantly forgiven.

Once we actually started talking, we couldn't seem to stop. He was extremely smart and we usually finished our biology labs long before class was over. We would spend the remainder of the time teasing each other and laughing. He never really provided too much personal information, though. I had heard from others that he was a foster kid, but I wasn't entirely sure if that was true. We tended to keep the conversation light, discussing normal teenage topics like our favorite music and books. He always put a smile on my face and it wasn't long at all before I felt myself falling for him.

Edward was shy and didn't appear to have many friends. In fact, I never really saw him hang out with anyone else. He always sat at the same table for lunch, rarely interacting with the other kids sharing his table. Instead, he walled himself off by listening to music on an old discman. I hadn't seen one of those ancient devices for years. Didn't everyone have MP3 players now? I watched him every day, stalking his every move from my table across the cafeteria. I had been tempted to join him many times, but was afraid switching tables might offend Angela and Jessica, two girls who had befriended me on my first day at Forks High. Plus, I was wary of being too forward, thus scaring Edward away. I wasn't ready for him to realize that I had a total crush on him.

In retrospect, I regretted failing to capitalize on the brief time I shared with Edward. We only had a few weeks to get to know each other before the incident at Port Angeles, and now I sadly realized that I may never have the chance to know the real Edward Masen. And the weird thing was that even after seeing him lose it, astonishingly killing three men with his bare hands, I still wanted to know him. And if I was honest with myself; I still had a crush on him.

But I wouldn't be seeing Edward today and I wasn't sure when I would have another chance to make the trip out to Edmonds. Frankly, I didn't know how many trips my old truck could actually handle, anyway. I was so angry at myself for not reading the fine print when I visited the DOC website. When I found the information regarding inmate visitation, I happened to miss the part where it said that visitors had to be approved before being cleared to meet with an inmate.

I felt my hands grip harder at the steering wheel, my face flushing with embarrassment over what had happened today when I got to the detention center:

I found a place in the visitor parking lot and made my way to the entrance, feeling a combination of nerves and excitement at the prospect of seeing Edward. I had attended almost every day of his trial and we had often smiled at each other across the room, but I hadn't actually talked to him since that night in Port Angeles. I wondered what he would think when he saw me there. Would he smile? Would he be embarrassed? I also wondered if I would be able to touch him; to give him a hug and tell him "thank you for saving my life". I was lost in my thoughts as I walked through the door and into the visitor lobby.

I went to the window to check in and gave the officer Edward's name as well as my own. He typed at the computer for a minute and wanted to know if Swan had one 'n' or two. After a while he looked up at me with a sad look on his face and announced that I wasn't on Edward's list of approved visitors, meaning that I couldn't see him until I was added to the list. My heart sank at his words. With the nervous build-up to my trip, I never had considered the possibility of not being able to see him. Why didn't I call the center first and ask questions about visiting an inmate? I could be so incredibly stupid sometimes!

I asked the officer what I needed to do to get on the approved list, and if there was any possible way to make that happen while I was here. He said that I would have to contact the inmate's lawyer to gain permission to be on the list. I explained that I had driven several hours to come here, pleading with him to call Edward to get permission. He regretfully said no; that wouldn't be allowed.

It was at this point that I realized I was crying and asked the officer if they had the lawyer's phone number on file, so I could call him. He informed me that they couldn't give out that information. He handed me a tissue and firmly told me there was no way I was going to be allowed to visit Inmate Masen today.

The officer said that my best bet would be to contact Edward's lawyer on Monday and fill out the necessary paperwork to become a registered visitor. He explained that it usually took two to three business days to be approved and then I could visit for one hour every Wednesday and/or Saturday. He also clarified that once I was approved, I could contact the inmate via mail or I could call him at designated times during the week. Apparently, since Edward was a minor, any and all correspondence with him would need to be approved by him, his lawyer, and the prison. "It's for your and the inmate's safety," he gravely explained. His words were spoken with an air of finality, urging me to take the hint and exit the premises.

I nodded at him and slowly made my way to the exit. I was totally screwed. I got back into my truck and continued sobbing until I had snot running down my face. I knew it was time for me to get a grip and return to Forks before Charlie got home. I couldn't believe that I had let my excitement over seeing Edward prevent me from taking the time to research before jumping in headfirst.

The drive back to Forks seemed to take much longer than it had this morning. I almost started crying again when I noticed the orange Reeses Peanut Butter cup wrapper poking out from my purse. I had brought the candy for Edward. He ate one cup everyday with his lunch and I figured it was unlikely that he had been allowed such a treat while being locked up in prison. I just wanted to brighten his day any way I could.

I finally made it home to Forks, characteristically rereading my favorite sections from Wuthering Heights while eating dinner. I got on the internet and completed the research I should have done earlier, carefully scanning all the rules and regulations of visiting an inmate. I couldn't remember the name of Edward's lawyer, so I googled the trial and found his name. I knew the public defender's office would be closed, but I called anyway, leaving a message for him to call me ASAP. There was really nothing more I could do until Monday arrived.

Monday couldn't come soon enough. I had spent most of Sunday in my room, depressed, but did manage to join Charlie for dinner. He tried to act like he felt guilty for leaving me all alone, but I could tell he had a great time and looked forward to going out again. Once I was on Edward's visitor list, naturally I would encourage Charlie to fish anytime. Maybe he would be up for a fishing trip to Alaska or something . . . I would have to enlist Jacob's help in getting Charlie out of my hair as much as possible.

Charlie left for work at his normal time on Monday and I was already awake, portable phone clutched in my hand. I willed the darn thing to ring but I heard nothing as I ate breakfast, folded some laundry, and sat down to watch TV. I was stretched out on the couch watching The Price is Right when finally the melodious ring tone of an unknown caller filled the air. It was a secretary at the public defender's office, who informed me that she would be happy to email me the paperwork, telling me that once I completed the forms I could mail them to their office in Port Angeles. I was bummed that I couldn't just email the forms back. Snail mail would surely just delay things by another couple of days. I reminded myself I probably wouldn't be able to attempt another visit for a while anyway, so it really didn't matter if things were delayed another day.

I ran upstairs to get on my computer, refreshing my email browser at least a hundred times before I saw a new message in my inbox. I squealed and opened it, immediately printing the application form.

Digging around in my desk drawer for an ink pen, I began completing the form. It looked pretty generic, asking about my contact information and my relationship with the inmate. "Future boyfriend," came to mind, but surprisingly that wasn't an option. I had arrived to the end of the application, my hand trembling with excitement, when I scrawled my signature. Then I read the last line, which made me sick to my stomach.

"If the applicant is under the age of 18, a parent or guardian's signature required."

It was official. I was screwed.


	4. Chapter 4

Almost two weeks had passed since I was sent to Meyer Detention Center. So far my stay had been filled with the occasional high point, promptly followed by extreme lows. Life in the prison system wasn't for the faint of heart.

On my third day, I was approached by a scowling, pale-faced kid with shorn hair. He had several tattoos; a swastika being the one most prominently displayed. I knew what he was trying to sell before he even opened his mouth. He represented the group called Purity. He wanted me to be "true to my race" and join his gang of racist lowlifes. Apparently if I agreed to be part of them, I would be offered protection and would serve my sentence in comfort. (Yeah, right.) If I refused, they would consider me an enemy and would make my life a living hell.

I've always had little patience for bigots. I remember hearing my dear old dad make negative comments about the minorities who ranked higher than him. He was insulted whenever he had to stand at attention and salute a superior he considered to be subhuman. What an asshole. The older I get, the more I have come to realize that my father had absolutely no redeeming qualities. I would even be willing to forfeit my having been born if it meant my mother could have lived a different life and married a decent man. She was a ray of sunshine who deserved so much better. Sighing and clenching my fists, I realized that it was a waste of time for me to wish for things that could never be. I hated how this place seemed to bring forth more memories of my childhood and the father who had taken away everything good in my life.

I told the kid "No thanks" and started turned to walk away. I felt the breath being knocked out of me as he slammed my body against the cement wall.

He held me by my throat, pinning my back tightly against the wall, and leaned in to hiss in my ear.

"Because I'm such a nice guy, I'll give you a chance to change your mind."

I could taste his foul breath and see his right eyelid twitch with anger. I wasn't afraid of him. I had faced far worse.

"Fuck you," I replied.

I grunted as he punched me in the stomach and then kneed me in the groin, resulting in an explosion of pain. My hands shot to my sore crotch as I inevitably slid down the wall onto the floor, my legs shaking too much to support me. He then spit on my face and sauntered away.

It took all the self control I possessed to not jump up and snap his neck like a twig. I could feel the rage flow through my body, but I fought to keep it in check. I kept picturing Bella smiling and blushing at me in biology class until I could feel the anger start to fade. Slowly I picked myself off the floor and made my way back to my cell.

On the fourth day I woke up and gingerly made my way to the shower room, feeling totally embarrassed to have my bruised and swollen testicles on display. Being naked in a room with fifty other guys was bad enough, but the condition of my genitals made it even worse on this particular day. I was undoubtedly the center of attention; mortified by the crude catcalls and jeers hurled my way. I showered as quickly as I could and was dressed within seconds.

I made it to the cafeteria, shuffling slowly toward the same sad, empty table I sat at every day. I picked at my congealed, scrambled eggs, thinking about how prison food sucked worse than school food, if that were possible. I heard the chair next to me scrape the floor as someone sat down. I looked over to see who had joined me, trying to appear casually disinterested.

My guest was a very large black kid who looked to be about nineteen or twenty. He introduced himself as Chronic (what kind of name is that?) Word on the street, he told me, was that I was making friends with the Aryan guys. I denied his allegation, vehemently explaining that I had no interest in being affiliated with any gang—I just wanted to do my time here and get out. I by no means desired to make enemies with him and his friends. He narrowed his eyes at me suspiciously before eventually nodding. As he got up to leave, he made sure to point out that they would punish me severely if I was lying.

I wondered if being approached by rival gangs was part of the new prisoner orientation or something. I kept to myself all day, anxiously waiting for the Asian or Native American kids to join suit by trying to force me into their posse. Luckily I flew under the radar for the rest of the day.

The next few days, I did get the occasional angry glare from a random kid, but nothing I hadn't experienced daily in my old group home. Instead of worrying about being coerced to join a gang, I threw myself into my schoolwork. The penal educational system was similar to high school, except that the classes were on a much lower level. Most of the kids here were grade levels behind. In fact there were quite a few inmates who couldn't even read. That must have been very embarrassing for them.

In the midst of all the ethnic diversity, when it came to academics I quickly discovered that I was in the minority here. I had always taken Advanced Placement classes and had a near perfect GPA back at Forks High. I survived a few days of mind-numbing classes and quickly decided to go ahead and sit for the GED exam as soon as possible. When I was allowed to work on practice tests in the library, I immediately realized how comfortable I felt with the material.

My opportunity to sit for the test came yesterday, and I have no doubt that I passed with flying colors. I found a copy of the Edmonds Community College course catalog on my bed when I returned to my cell; no doubt that was a gift from Officer Cullen. He's pretty cool for a correctional officer.

Last night I was eating in my normal solitude, skimming through the catalogue to identify various interesting college courses, when an inmate took the seat across from me at my table. I sighed, figuring it was another wannabe badass trying to threaten me. I didn't know it yet, but I was about to make my first friend here at Meyer Detention Center.

"Hey, you're from Forks High, right?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Yeah, I thought you looked familiar. I went there too. I think we had World History together last year?"

This had been the first friendly interaction from a fellow inmate that I had experienced. I studied him, trying to see if I remembered this kid with wavy blonde hair and big green eyes. I wasn't sure, but I thought his wide-eyed look did seem somewhat familiar.

"I'm Jasper." His smile faded as he uneasily cut into tonight's mystery meat.

"Nice to meet you, Jasper. I'm Edward."

Extremely funny and likable, Jasper drew me to him immediately. It turns out that I did remember him from Mrs. Carter's history class—he was the one always cracking jokes, trying to lighten the mood in the boring class. He had moved to Forks when he was ten from somewhere in Texas, and he was proud of his lingering southern drawl. "You can take the cowboy out of Texas, but not the Texas out of a cowboy", he liked to say. He had a twin sister named Rosalie, who I remembered well; she was lusted after by every guy (and some girls) at Forks high. She always seemed "stuck up" to me, but I would never tell Jasper that.

Jasper had been imprisoned at Meyer for two months already, after getting arrested for absconding with Police Chief Swan's police cruiser on a Friday night joyride back in the spring. I vaguely remember the buzz at school when that had happened; everyone had thought Jasper was uber-cool for that stunt.

He assured me that he was just "borrowing" the car to play a practical joke on a friend, and he planned to return the car with nobody being the wiser. However, he didn't realize that Chief Swan was an avid fisherman who would be up on a Saturday at four a.m. to go fishing, and he was instantly busted trying to return the car to its owner. "I pulled into the Chief's driveway at like 4:15 and he was standing on his porch with all his fishing gear, scratching his head, wondering where the heck his car had disappeared to. I didn't see him until it was too late. He was on me with a fishing knife in his hand before I could even take one step out of the car." Jasper shook his head regretfully. "I'm such an idiot."

We were both laughing hysterically at Jasper's failed attempt at being a criminal. It was my first laugh at Meyer, and it was a good one. He said his lawyer could have gotten him off with just community service, but his parents insisted he have a real punishment so that he would think twice before doing something illegal in the future. He only had a six month sentence, meaning that he would be leaving here in a few months.

I hoped he wouldn't ask what I did to be sent here, but once he shared the details of his notorious arrest, he was naturally interested in mine.

"So Edward, what are you in for?"

I was tempted to tell him I did something non-violent, like shoplifting, but I knew I was a terrible liar.

"Um . . . well . . . I'm here for manslaughter." I hoped he wouldn't ask for details.

"Manslaughter? No way! You killed somebody?"

My heart was pounding and my mouth felt dry. "Three people, actually."

"Holy shit, you killed three people? Why?"

"They were hurting someone I cared about and I had to stop them. I didn't actually mean to kill them, but I did."

"Damn Edward, you are such a badass. Remind me to never piss you off. How long are you in for?"

"I'm here till my twenty-first birthday."

Jasper winced. "Ouch, that's a long freaking time, man."

"You're telling me. But it's better than real jail."

He agreed and we continued talking until dinner was over. It was good to finally have a friend here. He introduced me to some other guys who he said were "cool". I knew I would have a better chance of making it though my sentence unscathed if I had an ally. Maybe now I wouldn't be such an easy target.

Today started like any other and I was on my way to the library when Officer Cullen stopped me in the hall.

"Masen, your lawyer is here for a pow-wow. Come with me."

I was surprised that Michael, my court appointed attorney, was here to see me; I had figured I would never see him again. He mentioned something about an appeal, but I really couldn't see any right-minded judge handing down a more lenient sentence.

Officer Cullen led me to the private rooms reserved for attorney/client meetings. Michael was already there, waiting with a box and some paperwork.

The box contained my personal belongings from the foster home where I had been staying when I was arrested. It wasn't much, just a few books, CDs, and some pictures of my mom and me from when I was younger. I had moved around so much there was no need for material possessions, and the other kids would usually steal things of value anyway. It was kind of depressing to think that my entire life fit in a cardboard storage box.

I thanked Michael for bringing my things and figured our visit was over, but I was shocked when I heard him say that Bella Swan had applied to become a registered visitor.

My jaw dropped and I was unable to speak for a moment. He passed over a manila envelope which contained her visitor application. There was a place for my lawyer and myself to sign, approving her. I looked up with wonder at my lawyer.

"Is this for real? She can seriously come to see me? She wanted this?" I was amazed.

"Yeah, Edward. She called the office herself and then filled everything out. Are you ok with seeing her? After everything that happened?"

Of course I wanted to see her. I had dreamt about being able to smell her, talk to her; even possibly touch her for months.

"Michael, give me your pen."

He handed it over and I signed my name on the document. He signed it as well and said that she was now an official visitor. I smiled my first real smile in months. Bella wanted to see me.

I thanked Michael, picked up my box, and walked into the hallway in a daze. Officer Cullen was waiting to escort me back to the cell block.

I heard footsteps rush behind us.

"Edward! Wait! I almost forgot!"

I turned around and saw Michael walking towards me with an envelope in his hand.

"Here, she wrote you a letter."

I snatched the letter and rushed to my cell as quickly as I could. Observing my quick pace, Officer Cullen chuckled, asking if the letter was from my girlfriend.

I smiled at him. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

I sat Indian-style on my bed and inspected my prize. It was a small white envelope with my name on the front, sealed with a glittery silver sticker on the back. The sticker had a unicorn on it. "Unicorns?" I muttered disdainfully.

I carefully opened the letter, trying my best not to rip the envelope. Once I had the flap open, I brought it up to my nose and sniffed. I could smell a faint scent of freesia and strawberries. It was one of the most wonderful and intoxicating scents I had ever experienced. It was all Bella.

I pulled out the sheet of stationery, noticing that the top of the page read A Note From Bella. I smiled. That was cute. I figured her mom probably had bought the stationery for her. Her handwriting was fairly messy for a girl—no big looping letters or small hearts used to dot the i's. Bella was more than just a silly schoolgirl. She was perfection.

I began to read.

_Dear Edward,_

_I hope this letter finds you well. I came by to see you last week, but apparently I needed to be approved by you first. I hope you will allow me the opportunity to visit you and thank you properly. But if seeing me brings back too many unhappy memories, I understand. I can't remember much from that night in Port Angeles, but I'm so thankful to you, my guardian angel. I have no doubt that I would be dead if it weren't for you. I hate that you are in that horrible place. I wish there was some way I could rescue you, because you deserve so much better. You are in my thoughts often and I hope you are staying safe. I'll try to visit as soon as I can. I've missed my biology partner. Thanks again for everything you've done and please let me know if there is anything I can bring you. See you soon._

_Love,_

_Bella_

She included her address at the bottom of the page, and I couldn't wait to write her back.

I read the letter over at least twenty more times, only stopping when "Lights Out" prevented me from seeing her perfect words. Once I closed my eyes, I fell into the first peaceful sleep since being arrested. The scent of freesia and the vision of her closing words "Love, Bella" gave me hope that maybe, just maybe, things were going to be okay.

A/N: The Unicorn reference was in honor of the greatest fanfic ever, Wide Awake. Check it out if you haven't.

Thanks for taking the time to read. Reviews are much appreciated.


	5. Chapter 5

BPOV

I've always been the "good girl". I can't really remember a time when I did something I shouldn't have done, and I certainly never did anything remotely illegal. As I shakily held in my hands the application that would allow me to visit Edward, I wondered if that was about to change.

I wasn't quite eighteen, so my dad would have to sign the form or I wouldn't be allowed to visit my Edward.

I cursed under my breath for a moment and tried to evaluate my options. Pursing my lips, I considered that I could always forge Charlie's signature. However, to betray his trust that way just seemed wrong, and if he ever found out, he would be so angry that he would probably forbid me from ever having any contact with Edward.

My second option would be to mail the application to Renee. She was my parent too, even if only in title. I knew she would likely sign it, but I was worried that it would take her weeks to get the form back to me, if she didn't misplace it. And with my scatterbrained mother, that was a big "if". I wanted to see Edward as soon as possible, so I crossed off Renee from my list of options.

Another option was to be honest with Charlie, though I already knew that he would refuse and then I would have to forge his signature anyway. I didn't want him to know about my desire to visit Edward and thereby become suspicious about me driving there when he wasn't around, but I didn't want to lie to him either.

I figured I would test the waters with Charlie first before I made my decision. Not wasting any time, I picked up the phone and dialed him at the station.

"Forks Police Department, Chief Swan speaking."

"Hey Dad."

"Bells! Nice to hear from you. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah Dad, everything's fine. I just had a legal question and I figured you were the expert when it comes to that sort of thing."

(I've learned it always helps to butter up my dad and to make him think that I need his expertise. Too bad I couldn't bat my eyelashes at him over the phone—I always get my way with that move.)

"Sure Bells, what's your question?"

"Well, I was thinking of sending Edward Masen a card, you know, to thank him for saving my life, and I didn't know where to start."

So I lied . . . but it wasn't too major in the grand scheme of things.

I could hear him sigh, and when he started talking, his voice sounded agitated.

"Why would you want to do that, Bells? I need you to stay away from that kid—he's dangerous."

"But Dad, it's only a card. I feel like I owe him that."

"I don't think that's a good idea. I'm sure he knows that you are grateful to him. You did attend almost every day of his trial; that should be thanks enough. Did you need anything else?"

Hearing the growl in his voice, I could tell this conversation was over. "No Dad, that's it. See you tonight."

"Bells, forget Edward Masen. He's not your problem."

My dad was wrong; Edward was my problem. He was serving a four-year sentence because of me, and the guilt was draped across my shoulders like the heavy raincoat I had to wear practically every day in this cold, dreary town.

I didn't understand why Charlie was not more understanding towards Edward. Considering that Edward prevented his only daughter from being violated and possibly killed, one would think that he would be grateful to him.

That phone call made my decision for me: I was going to forge my dad's signature. I considered forging Renee's, but the lawyers knew my mother didn't live with us and I was afraid they would be suspicious of me turning in her signature so quickly. My heart started thumping as I practiced Charlie's signature on a piece of scrap paper. Fortunately, his handwriting was messy like mine anyway, making this forgery easier to pull off.

As I signed Charles Swan on the form, I wondered if I could go to jail for forging a police officer's signature. I wouldn't mind that so much if it meant I could share a cell with Edward.

I really didn't have any plans for the rest of the day, and I wondered if it would be alright to deliver the application to the public defender's office myself. I figured it could save a day or two and the sooner I could get approved to see Edward, the better.

I called the office and they said that a personal drop-off would be fine. The secretary informed me that Edward's lawyer would be making a trip to see him at the detention center soon and if I wanted him to deliver a letter; he could arrange that for me. If I could have kissed her through the phone I would have. I wasn't sure when I could try to visit him again, but if I could get him a letter, that would certainly be better than nothing.

I took me forever to compose my letter. I started on notebook paper, but that seemed too impersonal. I then moved to my flowery stationary, but that seemed too girly. My only other option was some stationery with the cheesy headline, A Note from Bella. Biting my lip, I figured that would at least make certain that he knew the letter was from me.

I then spent twenty minutes debating on which pen to use, finally deciding on a purple gel pen because it looked the best with the stationary I chose. I finished the letter and placed it into the envelope, glancing down at my bed and floor which were littered with wadded balls of failed drafts. Who knew pouring your heart out on paper could be so difficult?

After another debate, I decided to write only his first name on the envelope. Writing out "Edward Masen" just seemed too formal. I licked the envelope closed, wincing at the awful flavor of the adhesive on the flap. I giggled thinking of that Seinfeld episode where George's fiancé died after licking toxic glue on the wedding invitation envelopes.

The envelope seemed quite naked in its whiteness, so I looked through my desk drawer for something to jazz it up. All I could find were some glittery unicorn stickers left over from elementary school. They seemed pretty goofy, but then again, I was pretty goofy, and a small part of me was hoping that maybe the sticker would make Edward laugh. I'm sure he needed a laugh, stuck in that awful place. Satisfied with the final product after placing the shiny sticker on the seal, I made it to Port Angeles as quickly as I could to deliver everything to the lawyer's office.

Waiting for a response from Edward was pure torture. I didn't actually know when the lawyer was visiting him, so I couldn't be sure that Edward had even seen my letter. I waited at the mailbox every afternoon for the mail carrier. I'm sure he thought I was completely mental, but he always winked and told me to have a nice day as he dropped the stack of mail in my hands.

I hit the jackpot nine days after writing my letter to Edward! I squealed and ran into the house clutching my envelope from the Department of Prisons to my chest. Though I was alone, I ran to my room and locked the door behind me—I couldn't risk Charlie walking in on this momentous occasion. Ripping the envelope open, I learned that I had been approved as an official visitor to one Edward Anthony Masen. They included the address I could use to write him and his inmate number. I frowned at the thought that to the prison system, Edward was just some number, no longer considered a human being.

There was a pamphlet with rules about visiting, sending packages, telephone calls, etc. I was excited by the thought of sending him a care package or calling him on the phone. Maybe I wouldn't always have to make the trip to Edmonds to talk to him. The possibilities for the myriad of ways I could show my gratitude swam through my mind.

Now that I was official I began scheming my next trip to Edmonds. It was Friday and I knew there would be no way I could arrange for Charlie to be gone tomorrow. That left the coming Wednesday as my next possible option. I jogged downstairs to study Charlie's work schedule on the refrigerator. He was working on Wednesday and he wouldn't be home before six that night. Quickly making some mental calculations, I figured I could make the trip and be back home before he returned from work. If he came by the house during the day and wondered where I was, I could claim to be school shopping. It was almost August and I would be back for my senior year in less than six weeks.

The next five days were the slowest I had ever experienced. Charlie and I had dinner with Billy and Jacob on Saturday and I was forced to spend much of the day with Jacob and some of the other guys from the reservation. Don't get me wrong; I like Jacob. He's been a really good friend to me since coming here, especially after I got attacked in Port Angeles.

Unfortunately Jacob's feelings towards me started changing into something more than just friendship since summer had started, and his lingering touches and longing stares were really starting to bug me. I just prayed he wouldn't try to kiss me, because I would have to punch him. I had never kissed a boy before—well, I had given Jared McDaniel a peck in the seventh grade, but that didn't really count. I was sure that I was a total freak because I had never kissed a boy for real, not with tongue involved, anyway. And I really didn't want my first genuine kiss to be with Jacob. I had another boy in mind.

Jacob behaved himself on Saturday, and I actually had a good time with the Blacks and my dad. Sunday was complete boredom. Charlie worked, meaning that I found myself sucked into a Law and Order marathon on TNT. I'm not really into television, but I found myself drawn into this show about crime and punishment. Gee, I wonder why?

It was actually sunny on Monday and I decided I would take a blanket to lay down in the yard to read. The sun's rays felt good on my pale skin and I was asleep before I made it through twenty pages of my book. The sound of a car horn startled me out of sleep. I quickly sat up and glanced toward the source of the noise to find my new friend, the mail carrier, waving a letter in my direction.

I sprung up and ran to the mailbox as fast as my legs would carry me. Naturally I tripped on an invisible object, landing face first in the grass. Mortified, I got up, brushed myself off, and snatched the letter from the mail carrier's hand. He shook his head—smirking—before he drove away.

I gasped when I saw that the letter was from Edward. I hustled back to my blanket, ecstatic that he had written me back; thankfully I didn't fall this time. Plopping down on the warm blanket, I carefully turned the letter over in my hands, admiring the cool, tangible weight of the envelope. I hadn't received a letter since summer camp in the fifth grade, and I loved the way my name looked in his handwriting. I smiled as I remembered his elegant script from Biology class; so much more refined than my own chicken scratches. I ripped the letter open as quickly as possible, shredding the back of the envelope almost in half.

He had written his letter on a sheet of college-ruled notebook paper. At first he thanked me for my letter and for thinking of him, but he said that he didn't want me to feel obligated to visit him. "Anyone with a shred of decency would have attempted to stop those men from hurting you." He admitted it would be nice to see someone from the real world and would look forward to seeing me; if it's what you really want. Always the gentleman, Edward was afraid that my need to see him was fueled entirely by guilt. I frowned at that assumption. Sure, I did feel responsible for what happened that night—I should have known better than to walk alone in a strange place at night. But guilt wasn't why I wanted to see Edward. To be honest, I wanted to see him because I liked him. He made me happy. And I had to admit that he was certainly easy on the eyes.

Though he tried to keep an upbeat report of his days at Meyer, I could feel a palpable loneliness pour from his words. He had passed the GED exam and had registered for three online classes at the local community college. So far the correctional officers had been treating him fairly well as he had steered clear of any trouble. One of the bright spots seemed to be that he had met a boy from Forks named Jasper.

I certainly knew who Jasper was; my dad had nearly killed him in our driveway for stealing his police cruiser. I believed that my dad totally overreacted and should have let the kid go, but Charlie always has been a stickler for the rules. Jasper was only around for a few weeks after I moved to Forks, and even in that short amount of time I could tell he was a fun guy. Imagining the level of isolation Edward must be feeling in there, I felt so relieved that he had found someone on the inside. Edward seemed to be such a kind and sensitive person, and I desperately hoped that prison wouldn't change that.

I was more excited than ever to visit him on Wednesday, which was now only two days away. He had mentioned that he was quite bored and wouldn't mind some magazines or crossword puzzle books to help pass the time. I was determined to bring him whatever he needed.

When Wednesday finally arrived, I stayed in bed and hid under the covers, fully dressed, waiting for Charlie to leave. I hit the road the moment Charlie left the house, making the three-hour trip with no complications and pulling into the visitor lot with thirty minutes to spare before visiting hours started. I had worn my favorite blue blouse and dark jeans. Feeling butterflies in my stomach, I pulled the visor down and checked out my appearance. I thought my hair looked pretty good, and though I don't do makeup, I did apply a little lip gloss to spruce things up a bit.

With a fair amount of trepidation, I entered the visitor area, handing over my driver's license and Edward's inmate number to the guard. He typed some information into the computer, had me sign the visitor log, and then led me to a room where I walked through a metal detector. The guards took the bag of items I had brought for Edward and pulled out each item, inspecting them one by one. I had read the visitation rules carefully this time and knew that I didn't bring anything that would be considered a violation, yet I still felt my heart pounding during the preliminary procedures.

Satisfied, the guard handed me back my things and led me to a room filled with a dozen round tables and chairs. I was the first person to arrive for visitation so I headed to a worn plastic table, plunking down my possessions. The guard stopped me.

"Ma'am, these tables are for inmates with unrestricted visitation. Inmate Masen is considered restricted, so you will be meeting him over there."

The guard was pointing to the far end of the visitation room, and my face fell seeing the thick barrier set up between inmate and visitor. I saw a small counter-top and chair facing a plexiglass partition; on the opposite side of the glass was a little room with its own counter and chair. There were several small circular holes in the center of the clear partition, which I assumed would allow us to hear each other while talking. The officer told me to have a seat and that Inmate Masen would be brought out shortly.

I sat down and fiddled with the sleeve on my blouse. I was so excited yet so nervous to see Edward again. I'll admit; I was totally bummed that we were being forced to meet with an inch of plexiglass separating us. I had envisioned hugging him and touching his hand to offer comfort. There wouldn't be any of that and it pissed me off, to be honest. My dreams of Edward one day kissing me during visitation were pointless now.

I was interrupted from my thoughts when I heard voices coming through the glass partition. I looked up to see a large, well-built guard escorting Edward into the room. I gasped as I took him in. He was still the same beautiful Edward from class, but he seemed different. He was thinner than I remembered and his eyes had deep circles underneath, making him look tired and sad at the same time. Edward's attention was on the guard and he didn't look in my direction until he was only a few feet away from the glass.

When his eyes met my own, his expression changed completely and I was met with the most genuine smile I had ever seen. "Bella", he whispered softly.

The guard gently pushed him into the chair and said we had one hour.

"You came."

"Nothing could stop me from seeing you, Edward. I just wish it could have been sooner. How are you?"

For a few moments he seemed to wrestle with how to respond, and he finally landed on, "I've been better."

I suddenly wanted to cry but instead I offered a fake smile.

"What, you don't just love it here at Chateau Meyer? I thought these were five-star rated facilities. It is all inclusive, isn't it?"

Gratefully he somehow managed a chuckle, and I couldn't think of a sweeter sound than my Edward laughing.

"So really," I continued. "Are you doing okay? I have all these frightening visions of how things are for you in here."

"So far it's really not that bad—it might even be better than a few of the group homes I've been in."

I didn't know Edward had ever lived in a group home, and my heart broke a little more for him. I wondered if he had ever had a family to love him. The only detail I had known about his family life was that he had lived in a foster home in Forks.

My voice cracked, "I'm sorry, Edward."

"Don't be sorry, Bella. It could be a lot worse."

I did not know how that could be true, but I dutifully nodded and gave him an encouraging look.

Eventually he told me about his days here at Meyer. He had several weeks before his college classes started and until then he had a lot of free time during the day, which he spent reading or hanging out with Jasper. Apparently Jasper was quite the athlete and he had Edward out playing baseball with his group of friends during their required exercise hour everyday. Edward said it was fun and that he was surprised that he wasn't the worst player out there. I felt relieved to hear that he had a chance to get fresh air everyday, because it seemed a majority of his time was spent alone in his cell. I could tell Edward was excited about starting college.

Once college classes began, he would be taking English, Calculus, and Biology. I felt wistful thinking of our short time as lab partners. He smiled his crooked smile, shyly telling me that Biology wouldn't be the same without me. I smiled back at him as I felt myself blush.

He surprised me by asking if I had been alright after he had been arrested in Port Angeles. With concern showing in his golden-brown eyes, he said that I had been unconscious by the time he was able to get to me and he hadn't been able to discern if I was hurt. A hint of hostility crept into his voice as he explained that the police pulled him away from me before he had a chance to assess my injuries.

I reminded him that I remembered very little from that night and that my injuries had been superficial and minor. Taking a deep breath, I looked Edward directly in the eye and thanked him again for saving my life. My heartfelt gratitude caused him to blush, and I think I heard him mumble something about how anybody would have done the same. I felt a tugging sensation in my heart, witnessing him being so hard on himself.

It seemed like I had just gotten there when the bulky guard came by and told Edward that we had only five minutes remaining. I couldn't believe how quickly the time had gone; I easily could have spent the rest of the day talking with Edward. We were suddenly at a loss for words. I could tell he didn't want to say goodbye either.

I promised him I would come again—hopefully next Wednesday—and that I would still write to him. Biting my lip, I then asked him if I could call him. He said I could, but usually there was a line of people waiting to use the phones and that if I was lucky enough to get through, another inmate eager to dial out would probably hang up on me. Edward nervously commented that he could call me, but his cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he explained that he didn't have any money to place the long-distance call. I immediately made a mental note to purchase him a calling card. Letters were great, but I would love to be able to speak to him on a regular basis.

I could see the guard coming from a distance to get Edward and I knew it was time to say goodbye.

"I h-h-hate that you are behind that glass," I stammered. "I really wanted to hug you . . . you know, to thank you for everything."

He smiled. "Yeah, since I'm a violent offender I have to spend my first two months under restricted visitation. Apparently I have to earn the chance to meet in the regular visitation room. If I can go the next few weeks without incident, I can visit with you in the regular room."

I did a mental fist pump. "Oh, so this is just temporary?" I asked, gesturing to the glass barrier separating us.

"Yeah, it's temporary. Soon enough we can play cards like everyone else out in the visiting area."

Silly boy; playing cards was hardly what I had in mind. I began blushing again and I hoped this time he didn't notice.

The guard came back and told us our visit was over, motioning for Edward to get up. Edward leaned forward and placed the palm of his hand over the small holes in the glass partition.

"Bella, thank you for coming—y-y-you have no idea how much this means to me. I look forward to next week."

I placed my palm on the glass, mirroring his gesture. We adjusted the placement of our hands so that our fingertips were pressed into the small holes in the glass, allowing me just lightly to feel the soft warmth of his skin on my own fingers. I felt a jolt of electricity from where my fingers touched his own, and the bolt of arousal quickly spread throughout my body. I was barely touching him, but this was possibly the most erotic experience of my life. I could tell he felt it too, because he was biting his lip and looking deeply into my eyes.

We both whispered our goodbyes and the guard led him away. Right before he left my line of sight, he turned around and winked at me. I waved goodbye and got up to leave. I looked down and realized I had forgotten to give Edward the things I had brought for him. I gave the bag to another guard who promised to have it delivered to his cell.

I made my way back home to Forks with a smile on my face. There were only seven days till I could see Edward again!


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks to everyone who took the time to leave a review. They put a big smile on my face. **

**This is a fluffy chapter to keep us happy before things become angsty.**

**Special thanks to my beta, Jensy/pbswimmer. You complete me. **

**Also, special thanks to mspacman1 and Twilightfan104 for pimping out my story. You two rock and I appreciate your support. :)**

**I'm already working on the next update and hope to have it up before Friday.**

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_Bella led me through the forest, our hands entwined. "Come on Edward, We're almost there." I smiled and pulled her hand up to my mouth, placing a kiss on each of her fingers. "I'm coming, Beautiful." We walked until we were no longer under the cover of trees, and as the mist parted, we both stopped short, taking in the magnificent view. Before us was a beautiful meadow, filled with lush green grass and wildflowers. This private haven seemed so out of place amongst the giant hardwoods of the Pacific Northwest. It was absolutely breathtaking. _

_We walked until we were in the middle of this secret meadow and Bella spread out a blanket she seemed to pull from nowhere. "Come and lie with me, Edward." I complied and found myself lying on my side facing Bella. The sun felt warm on my skin and birds were chirping in the distance. I smoothed my hand along Bella's delicate collarbone and gently inched my way up to her face. She was so soft and I could feel a tingle of electricity whenever my hand made contact with her skin. She had her hand in my hair, gently massaging my scalp. Her touch felt amazing, causing me to close my eyes and let out a soft moan. _

_I opened my eyes and drew my face closer to Bella's. I could feel her warm breath on my face as I closed the distance, bringing our lips together in a soft kiss. We continued kissing and I took her bottom lip between my own, graciously feeling her open her mouth to me. I began to deepen the kiss but was suddenly overtaken by a bright light glaring down from the sky. I put my hands in front of my face to shield myself from the blinding light. What was happening?_

I woke up completely disoriented. I hated that Meyer's method of waking inmates every morning was to turn on the glaring overhead lights. Since there were no windows in my room, it went from pitch dark to camera-flash bright in less than a second, and the experience was painful. I was especially annoyed by the lights this morning, because I was interrupted from a very pleasant dream involving Bella. I was kissing her. I moaned bitterly, realizing that I had never kissed Bella and probably never would. I would give almost anything to have the chance to sit on a blanket in a field of grass with her.

I could feel the tightness of my briefs as my morning arousal strained against the waistband, and I silently willed my erection to go away. I'm not typically one for masturbation. My dad had threatened me with bodily harm if he ever caught me touching myself as a child, and I've never really been able to move past that threat. But I've never dreamt of a girl quite as amazing as Bella Swan, either.

I was due in the shower room in the next ten minutes and walking in with an erection would be a death sentence, so I filled my head with the most unappealing thoughts I could muster. Even juvenile detention centers had their share of sexual predators.

I quickly straightened my room, showered at the speed of light, and made it to breakfast. I saw Jasper already in the cafeteria, and I sat my tray down at his table.

"What's up, Masen?"

"Another day in paradise, Hale. How about you?"

"It's Wednesday, and my sister is coming to visit. My mom always sends some home-cooked food with her, so I can't wait."

Jasper loved to eat and apparently his mother's culinary skills exceeded those of anyone the Food Network had to offer. I pictured him stuffing his face in the visitation room, since he wasn't allowed to bring anything homemade back in to Gen Pop with him.

"So," he mumbled, his mouth full of food, "Is your girl coming to see you today?"

He swallowed and smirked at me before swigging his orange juice.

I had opened up to Jasper about Bella a few weeks ago. It just felt right to share everything with another person. I started from the beginning and told him about Biology class and my major crush on Bella. I told him that she was the girl I saved in Port Angeles and that she had been coming to visit me the past month.

Jasper thought it was hilarious that I was smitten with Chief Swan's daughter. He was terrified of the good Chief and told me I better not break her heart or Charlie would break my balls. "You didn't see his eyes when he held that knife to my throat, man. And _I_ wasn't trying to get in his daughter's pants." I explained that I was hardly trying to get into her pants, but Jasper didn't believe me and made it a point to bring up Bella almost every day thereafter.

Bella had visited me three times, and each visit was a bright spot in my dreary prison existence. Each visit left me thrumming with happiness for a good twenty-four hours. Sadly, she had to skip last week when she flew to Jacksonville to visit her mother. She did, however, write me every day she was gone, making her absence slightly more tolerable, but now I was dying to see her.

I was especially excited because today would be our first visit in the real visitation room. We would no longer be thwarted by that horrible glass barrier between us, permitting only phantom touches through the glass. I was almost giddy at the idea of being able actually to touch her, yet I was also terrified of being so close to her. I hoped I wouldn't somehow do something stupid to scare her away.

"Yeah, Bella's coming today, and I'm no longer considered 'dangerous', so we'll be in the normal room."

"Ah. Your first real visit, eh? And it's been two weeks? I hope you'll be able to control yourself." He snickered.

"Jasper, I'm entirely confident that I'll be okay. Jumping her in front of twenty juvenile delinquents is hardly romantic."

"Well, I never claimed to be romantic. If Alice were to ever visit me, I'd make a complete fool of myself."

Jasper had been pining for some girl named Alice for years. They had shared a classroom table in the fourth grade and he said spent the entire year trying to get her attention. Of course, nine year-old boys think that pulling a girl's chair out from under her, throwing wads of paper at her, or stealing her favorite pencil was the way to a girl's heart. After a full year of dealing with Jasper's immature antics, Alice officially hated his guts.

Things only got worse when Alice became his twin sister Rose's best friend. They were inseparable. Jasper had spent the last several years enduring Alice being at his house, completely ignoring his existence. He had longed to tell Alice his feelings, but figured Rose would kill him, and he was also afraid Alice would just laugh at him.

We talked a little more and then Jasper headed to class. I went to the Education office to pick up my textbooks for my college classes, eagerly preparing for my first day of online education tomorrow. Officer Cullen had hinted around that if I kept my grades up and stayed out of trouble, they might allow me to leave the facility to attend classes at the community college or even as a transfer student to the University of Washington. I figured as long as I was trapped here, I may as well take advantage of the free educational opportunity. I had always dreamed of becoming a physician and hoped that still might be a possibility.

I picked up my textbooks and a folder containing the information I would need to set up my online account with the community college. Mr. Jennings, Meyer's Education Director, went over the rules and expectations for inmates taking college courses. He was really emphasizing the whole "being able to work towards a degree is a privilege, and can be taken away if rules are violated". His warnings were rather unnecessary; I had no intention of doing anything that would get me in trouble. So far I was demerit free and I wanted to stay that way so I would be able to visit Bella.

There was still an hour before visiting hours started, so I decided to familiarize myself with the computer lab. There were six computer stations and I was relieved that there were partitions between each one; the privacy would help keep me focused once classes began. I had never taken a class online before and I hoped that the lack of a traditional classroom setting would not make the learning process more difficult. After many months of being locked up, it felt strange sitting in front of a computer screen—something I formerly did every day of my life. It was a weird reminder of my life before captivity.

I followed the directions from the college to set up my account, feeling pleasantly surprised to discover that I would have an email account. Mr. Jennings never mentioned that personal emails were prohibited, and I totally planned to use this oversight to my advantage. Emailing Bella would certainly be a welcome distraction. She would be starting school soon as well, and I figured she wouldn't have the time to visit quite as much.

I got everything set up relatively quickly and figured out how to access my different classes. I would have several lectures to watch each week and I would use a program called "Blackboard" to interact with the other students in each of my classes. In particular, my English class required a substantial amount of peer review. I was embarrassed at the thought that I may have to divulge that I was an inmate to my fellow classmates, but I tried to look at the bright side of things. At least I would have day to day interaction with people who weren't criminals. I guess I thought I would be isolated from others when taking an online class, but that wouldn't be the case. I printed out the syllabus for each of my three classes and headed over to my cell.

Damn, I still had some time left before Bella arrived, and I was full of angst. Today there would be no barriers between us; an important step for our relationship. We would be sharing a table and we could touch each other, as long as we obeyed the rule that our hands had to be above the table at all times. They didn't allow any inappropriate touching, and I was mortified at the thought that people would actually try any below-the-table action. Teenage boys were such barbarians. If I were ever given the pleasure of touching Bella below the waist, it wouldn't be in a room filled with a bunch of criminals.

My hands were sweaty and I kept nervously running them through my hair. Now that we would be up close and personal, would I seem different? Would she continue to see me as the nice boy she had met in Biology, or would she see me as a monster? Deep inside I felt like a monster, and I was terrified that she would see me that way too. I had always worried if she would be afraid of me after watching me lose my shit in Port Angeles.

I really had gone off the deep end when I had seen those guys holding her down, ripping off her blouse and roughly unbuttoning her jeans. I could still hear two distinct sounds from that night in my dreams: Bella screaming, "Please, no!" and the snap of bone as I broke the neck of each of those bastards one by one. She said she didn't remember what happened that night, but she was at the trial and she must have heard the prosecutors highlight the fact that I continued slamming the ringleader's head into the pavement long after he was dead.

I shook my head, trying to clear the ugly images of that night from my thoughts. She couldn't think I was a monster, right? She wouldn't be writing me and visiting me if she did. She certainly wouldn't blush and try to touch my hand through plexiglass if she didn't like me.

Argh. I hated how insecure I was when it came to Bella. I'm sure if I had any experience with girls, it would be different. I've never had a girlfriend or anything remotely close to one. I have kissed one girl, but it was far from romantic and I remember being totally grossed out as she shoved her tongue down my throat. I'm sure that wouldn't be the case with Bella. She was different. I tried to be positive that Bella felt the same way I felt about her.

I peered out the door of my cell to the clock on the far wall. Only two minutes had passed since I last looked, and I felt like I would combust if I was forced to wait any longer. Luckily she was always here right at the start of visiting hours. I decided to brush my teeth and put on fresh deodorant. She would actually be close enough to notice things like my scent, and I didn't want to scare her away with bad breath. I checked my reflection in the mirror and tried taming my insubordinate mane of hair. I made sure my prison jumpsuit was as wrinkle-free as possible and checked for spots or stains. God, I was turning into such a girl. I was so busy appraising my appearance that I didn't hear Officer Cullen walk into my cell.

"Primping for the ladies, Masen?" He was laughing at me.

I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment. "Well, my designer clothes are at the dry cleaners. This jumpsuit just seems so . . . last year. Do you think she'll notice?"

He continued laughing and rolled his eyes. "I don't think the cute brunette in the waiting room is gonna mind, Masen. Let's go."

He led me down the hallway and stopped in front of the door to the visitation room.

"Masen, is your visitor Chief Swan's daughter?"

"Yes, sir."

"Is she your girlfriend?"

"No sir, but I hope one day she will be."

"Masen, I doubt very seriously that her dad knows she has been coming here to visit you. I'll be keeping my eyes on things and if you ever do anything to try to hurt her, I will contact Chief Swan immediately."

Damn. I never considered the fact that her dad wouldn't want her to come and see me. He had come to jail to visit me once, and interrogated me more hostilely than the actual detectives investigating my crime. I could tell he didn't like me and for some reason I felt like he doubted my story that the reason for my violence was to protect Bella. If he found out she's been spending time with me, he would freak, effectively ending happy Edward and Bella time. I would need to be more careful with sending letters and such. Email was starting to sound like such a good idea.

"You know Chief Swan?" I asked.

"I've known him for years. He's actually the one who got me into law enforcement. I'm working on my degree in Criminal Justice in addition to working here."

"So, you're from Forks?"

"Yeah Kid, I'm from Forks. Why do you think I take such good care of you? You're a hometown boy. And I also know that you saved Bella that night; that's the only reason I haven't called Chief Swan already. Don't make me regret trusting you, Edward."

He had never called me by my first name before and I vowed never to lose Officer Cullen's trust. He was watching out for me, and in a place like this, that was nothing short of a miracle.

"Now get in there and talk to your girl."

He pushed me through the door and told me I had an hour.

I noticed there were several inmates already sitting with their visitors. I looked around for Bella and when I found her sitting alone a table on the left side of the room, I smiled brightly.

She was looking in my direction and when our eyes met, she instantly grinned and began blushing. I walked quickly over to the table and she stood up to greet me. Internally I was debating how I should greet her. Should I hug her or just shake her hand? Bella decided for me and before I had a chance to say anything, she moved towards me and enveloped me in her arms, her head pressing into my chest. I closed my eyes and brought my long arms around her small frame and wrapped them around her. It had been years since someone had shown me this level of physical affection, and I basked in the raw beauty of it. I leaned my head down and placed my nose in her hair, breathing in the essence of Bella: freesia and strawberries. We still hadn't spoken and I could have stayed in this position forever, had the officer monitoring the visitation room not approached us.

"Alright, Masen, that's enough. Take your seats, please."

I reluctantly released Bella and gazed into her eyes. She was wearing the biggest smile I had ever seen and I couldn't help but grin back at her. I motioned to her chair and I took the seat next to her. Our chairs were about a foot apart, and I could feel an almost magnetic pull towards her. I wanted to scoot my chair closer, but decided not to push things on the first visit. Our arms were both resting on the table and it seemed our hands were miles apart. I slowly slid my right hand a little closer to hers.

I asked her about her trip to Jacksonville and she filled me in on all the activities she did with her mom and her step-dad. Apparently he played minor league baseball, so they went to a few of his games and spent some time at the beach. She said it was nice to see her mom, but the visit just solidified her decision to keep living in Forks. She said her mom was the happiest she'd ever seen her and she would have just gotten in the way if she had stayed there. I figured her mom must be a selfish idiot not to want her amazing daughter around all the time.

While we were talking I slowly slid my hand towards hers. I couldn't tell for sure, but I swear she was doing the same thing. Only a few inches separated her hand from mine. I longed to reach out and take it, but something held me back.

We talked about the upcoming school year. I was excited about starting classes, but she wasn't exactly thrilled about another year at Forks High. She said it would be like starting over again, since she finished the last school year from home, nursing her injuries from the attack.

"You were the only friend I made last year and now you are locked up here. It's going to totally suck to go back there."

"Bella, what about your friend Jacob you told me about? Won't you see him at school?"

She had told me about how Jake had been such a good friend to her after the incident and that his support had probably prevented her from becoming clinically depressed. I'll admit I felt a little jealous in regards to him, but I tried to remember that if she was interested in him, she certainly wouldn't be sitting here with me.

"No, Jacob's a Quileute. He goes to school on the reservation."

Oh, so he was the long-haired kid who came with her to my trial.

I was sad that Bella was dreading school. Without looking, I moved my hand towards hers and nearly jumped when I felt my fingers make contact with her warm skin. Touching her was like Fourth of July fireworks. It was amazing. She had stopped talking and was blushing at me. I hoped she felt the sparks too.

"Um, is this okay?" I motioned to my hand on top of hers.

"It's more than okay, Edward."

And with that she turned and opened her hand, entwining her fingers with mine. I know it may sound cheesy, but I had never held a girl's hand before and having her hand in mine was one of the most amazing things I had experienced. My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest, and I silently tried to calm myself. I didn't think she was ready to know just how much she affected me.

We spent several minutes not speaking, just glancing back and forth between our hands and our faces. I couldn't stop smiling and neither could she.

We were disrupted from our romantic reverie when I heard a familiar voice holler at us from the next table.

"Hey Masen!"

I looked over to see Jasper sitting with his sister Rose, who was busily unpacking a dozen containers of food onto the table. She looked at me and then at Bella, scowling at us both.

"You must be Bella. Hi, I'm Jasper. Tell your dad I'm real sorry about the car thing."

He then whispered much too loudly. "Dude, you never told me how hot she was!"

I wanted to strangle him, but that would require me taking my hand away from Bella's and I wasn't willing to break our physical connection.

"Edward, this is my sister Rosalie. Rosalie, this is Edward. He's from Forks too. And that's his girlfriend Bella."

Rosalie was still scowling at us and mumbled something I couldn't understand.

Once again I wanted to kill Jasper. Now Bella was going to think I told him that she was my girlfriend. If she ran away screaming, I couldn't blame her.

Luckily, Jasper was distracted by the tantalizing aromas of Mama Hale's home cooking and quickly forgot about us.

Bella squeezed my hand and smiled playfully. "Girlfriend, huh?"

She was blushing and I figured my cheeks were equally as red.

"About that. I'm orry Bella, Jasper's a little crazy."

"I thought it sounded kinda nice, actually." She was blushing even more now and looked down at our hands.

"Yeah, it did have a nice ring to it, didn't it?"

We continued blushing and giggling like a couple of seventh graders. It was a little embarrassing, but I figured I had as much experience as most seventh graders when it came to girls, so this was to be expected.

All too soon a guard approached us and announced that our hour was up. We both got out of our chairs and Bella gave me another amazing hug. She promised to visit soon and I quickly gave her my new email address. I watched her walk out and then followed the guard back to my cell. As I was walking, I kept asking myself, "Does this mean Bella's my girlfriend?"

Back in my cell I pulled out the logic puzzle book Bella had brought that first day and began working through a puzzle. She had written a note in the book about how this would keep my mind sharp for those college classes I would soon be taking. The only thing my mind knew for sure at this moment was that I was completely in love with Isabella Swan.

**Thanks for reading. Reviews are love.**

**My fanfic rec of the day. Hydraulic Level 5. It's on my favorites list. A very original and well written story.  
**


	7. Chapter 7

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to review! I appreciate each and every one. This is one last bit of fluff before I send in the angst brigade. I hope you enjoy!

Special thanks to Jensy for being the best beta ever!

Disclaimer: Twilight is all Stephenie Meyer. I just put her characters in prison.

BPOV

The first day of my senior year had finally arrived. I stood in the parking lot, leaning against my old red Chevy and cynically observing my excited classmates mingle and greet one another. There was a buzz in the air and everyone seemed eager and happy to be here. Well, everyone except me. I had been dreading this day for weeks.

I typically enjoy my classes since I love learning, but the social part of school has been less appealing as I've never felt like I belonged anywhere—not in Phoenix, and certainly not here in Forks (with the exception of Biology class with Edward). I formed a few acquaintances last year before the incident, but I didn't really consider myself "friends" with anyone. If Edward were here, things would be different. I smiled at the thought of us walking through the halls together, impervious to all the high-school bullshit; squeezing each other's hand for comfort.

I looked down at my watch and saw that I had just a few minutes before class started. I took a deep breath, knowing that I had put things off long enough. It was time to get it together.

I began walking through the parking lot towards the school entrance, and felt the heated stare of every pair of eyes following me to the front steps. I heard snatches of words like "rape", "Port Angles", and "Edward Masen" whispered several times before I angrily cranked up my ipod, inserting my ear buds to block everyone out.

I made my way to my first class, which was Calculus. I found an empty seat near the front of the class; figuring if I sat in the front, I would be less likely to notice people staring at me. As the other students shuffled to their seats, I opened my messenger bag and found a notebook, my pencil, and a stack of small envelopes that Edward had given me on my last visit to Meyer.

There were seven letters in all, and I had exhibited incredible self-control by not allowing myself to read them before today. There was one letter for each of my six class periods and then another labeled "Lunch" in his fancy scrawl. I located the letter for first period and tore into the envelope, pulling out a sheet of notebook paper.

_Bella,_

_You're a senior! I know you aren't excited about starting school, but think of this as a new beginning. So I hope you will take the opportunity to have fun and make new friends. Just think—in less than a year you will be free from the mind-numbing boredom that is Forks. I wish I had been there to greet you in the parking lot and walk you to class. Just know that you are in my thoughts always._

_Edward_

_Ps. Here's a little math humor to get you in the calculus frame of mind._

_What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?  
_

_Pumpkin Pi_

I giggled at Edward's lame math joke, deeply appreciating his attempts to make today more bearable. I needed to stop wallowing in self-pity by remembering that his life was infinitely worse than mine.

I survived the first part of my day and before I knew it, I was already sitting in my third period class: Horticulture. We would be spending a fair amount of time in the greenhouse and I looked forward to watching the various plants progress from seedlings to beautiful flowers. Examining a white lily more closely, I wondered if Edward was allowed plants in his cell. I would love for him to have a tiny green seedling—a sign of growth and hope—with him in his dreary cell. If I had planted it myself, it would be almost like a piece of me remaining with him as he sat alone in his cell.

His letter for that class was funny and sweet, just like the others. He included a drawing of _Toxicodendron radicans__**, **_better known as poison ivy.

_Bella,_

If you happen to see this plant while out on your horticultural adventures, please run away. Enjoy your class and keep working on that green thumb.

Maybe I shouldn't have told him about my accident proneness. I could totally see myself falling head first in a patch of poison ivy.

Now that it was lunch period, I headed to the cafeteria, feeling vulnerable as I walked the halls alone. There were always students staring and whispering in my direction as I passed by, but I hoped I would find their new-found fascination with me easier to deal with as the day progressed. Surely I would be old news in a few days and I could begin to fly under the radar again.

Once in the cafeteria, I placed my standard salad and lemonade combo on my tray and scanned the room for a place to sit down. Angela and Mike, my lunch mates from last year, were sitting at a table on the far side of the room, but they were both sitting with their significant others. The couples were acting a little too lovey-dovey for my tastes, and I didn't want to interrupt. So, I shuffled to a nearby empty table and plopped down.

The embarrassment from sitting alone was quickly tempered by knowing that I had Edward's lunch letter waiting for me. Scanning the letter quickly, I laughed when I read that he wanted me to eat a brownie in his honor. I would have to thank him profusely for the letters; his words had certainly taken the edge off of today. Maybe I would bring some brownies for the chocolate-lover on my next visit. I was lost in my thoughts of Edward and didn't notice that I was no longer sitting alone until I heard an unfamiliar voice say "Hi Bella, do you mind if we join you?"

I looked up and noticed a petite pixie of a girl with bright eyes and dark hair, cut short and sticking out at all angles. I thought maybe I recognized her, but I wasn't entirely sure. Next to her was the girl who had been visiting Jasper at the detention center—Rose, I think her name was.

They had already sat down and started eating,

The small one was looking at me smiling. "I'm Alice Cullen and this is Rosalie Hale. We are going to be the best of friends, I just know it!"

Her enthusiasm was startling, but I could feel the sincerity in her words.

Rosalie wasn't as excited as Alice, but she smiled and nodded in my direction. She was a far cry from the bitch I encountered at Meyer last week.

"Um, hi; I'm Bella Swan. Nice to meet you."

I glanced around and saw that almost everyone in the cafeteria was staring in my direction. Ugh. It was so annoying. I hated to think what people were saying about me.

Alice saw my frown and patted my shoulder consolingly.

"Don't let these idiots get to you Bella. You know how small towns like Forks can be; anything remotely exciting gets blown way out of proportion. You wouldn't believe the things people are saying."

I cringed. "Like what?"

I was morbidly curious. I would probably regret asking, but I just had to know.

"Well, there was talk that you were involved in a drug deal gone terribly wrong."

I laughed. "Oh yeah, that's me; dealing crack on the side."

"Everybody knows that's bullshit, but it sounds scandalous with your dad being the Chief of Police and all."

"What else?" I couldn't imagine what could be worse than a botched drug exchange.

"Hmm. Another was that you had met some guy online and were hooking up with him in Port Angeles, planning to run away together. But he turned out to be hideous and when you tried to leave, he stopped you."

"Wow" was all I could reply.

"Yeah, we knew that was crap too. You are way too pretty to be looking for guys online, and besides that everybody knew that you and Edward Masen had some kind of love connection going on."

My cheeks burned red hearing the words "Edward" and "love" in the same sentence. They could tell that about me and Edward? Last year?

Alice noticed my flushed cheeks and rolled her eyes. "Bella, please. He was constantly looking longingly in your direction everyday at lunch. Plus, he went out of his way to talk to you. In two years, I never saw him speak to anyone except you. That boy was crazy about you; I guess he still is."

She winked, and Rose was nodding in agreement.

"That leads me to the third version of what happened that night and it's my personal favorite. So, apparently Edward Masen is a vampire and heard those guys trying to hurt you with his super vampire hearing. Since he's in love with you, he flew to your rescue and killed the guys responsible, drinking their blood."

I had chosen the wrong moment to take a sip of lemonade and started choking, spewing it everywhere.

When I could finally breathe I choked out, "You have to be kidding me. People can't be saying that."

"It's crazy, huh? I'm telling you, people in small towns are nuts. They say he was going to turn you into his vampire lover, but the cops got there too quickly and he never had a chance to seal the deal."

"So Bella, _is_ Edward a vampire?" Rosalie asked in a serious tone.

At this point the three of us were laughing hysterically and I didn't even notice the whole cafeteria looking in my direction. If _this_ was the crap they were whispering about me, I was not going to let it bother me in the least. I would be totally dressing like a vampire for Halloween in a couple of months.

Now that the ice was broken between us, Rose began speaking. "Sorry if I was a bitch the other day at Meyer. I had plans with Alice but my mom made me cancel them to go visit my dope of a brother. I was really pissed off about having to be there. I guess it wasn't a good first impression of me."

"Thanks for saying that. I wondered what your problem was, and I'm glad it wasn't directed towards me. But I disagree about your brother—he seems like such a sweetie. He's made Edward's life bearable in that horrid place."

"Believe me, if you had to live with Jasper, your opinion would change. He's an idiot. I mean, who steals a patrol car from the Chief of Police's driveway and then _returns_ it? If he had just left it somewhere, no one would have ever known it was him. Dumbass. And now Mom and Dad act as if they must atone for being such unobservant parents and are on my case constantly. I didn't even do anything!"

Alice chimed in, "Oh, Rose. Give Jasper a break. The only reason he took that car was to impress me. I insisted that he take it back, so technically it's my fault. If I had just let him give me a ride, he probably wouldn't have gotten caught. I think it's kind of romantic how he stole a car for me."

Rose cringed as Alice sighed. "God, Alice. It's so gross that you have a thing for my brother."

My eyes gleamed with excitement. "So, you have a crush on Jasper?"

Alice nodded.

"Since like the third grade", Rose interjected. "Thankfully, she's too chicken to actually tell him. I would totally vomit at the sight of them sucking face. Yuck."

"Rose, I'm not too chicken to tell him! I'm just playing hard to get. He must not be interested."

Rose was shaking her head. "Can we please change the subject away from my douche of a brother?"

"So," Rose said, looking at me, answering her own question. "You and Masen, huh? You two looked totally hot for each other at Meyer last week."

I couldn't stop myself from smiling. "I think so. We haven't really defined our relationship, so I don't really know what to call us."

"He's totally into you. I would give anything to have a guy look at me the way he was gazing at you."

Rose and Alice sighed in unison.

I was shocked. Ever since I came to Forks I heard tons of guys talk about Rose and how hot she was. Girls like her always seemed to have a boyfriend.

"So you don't have a boyfriend, Rosalie?"

"No, the boys at this God-forsaken school aren't worth my time. High school boys are far too immature. I just haven't found the right older man. I'm waiting for next year and all the college men that will be at my disposal."

The bell rang, pulling us out of our engrossing girl talk. I never expected to have a conversation with girls like Rose and Alice and actually enjoy myself. I would never have admitted it, but I hoped they would join me at lunch again tomorrow.

I quickly walked to my British Literature class. I knew this would be my favorite class this year since I loved the classics, and I couldn't wait to read Shakespeare, Chaucer, and of course the Bronte sisters. The required reading list had already been placed on our desks and I giggled when I saw that Bram Stoker's Dracula was going to be covered. What was it with the Vampires today?

I quickly pulled out Edward's next letter before the teacher began speaking.

_Bella,_

_I'm sure this is the class you have patiently waited for all day. I can picture your smiling face while losing yourself in the classics. I wanted to write you something poetic, but the best I could come up with was a little haiku._

_Beautiful Bella_

_Soft skin, warm eyes, pure of heart_

_I long to be yours_

I sighed at Edward's heartfelt poem. Could he be more romantic? Could I survive the next five days without seeing him? I lost myself in visions of Edward as the teacher began lecturing.

Before I knew it my first week of school was over. Alice and Rose had invited me to the movies to celebrate the start of the weekend, but I declined, knowing that I had to get some sleep so I could visit Edward tomorrow. I hadn't visited him since the Wednesday before school started and I was dying to see him.

Edward and I had communicated via email every day and fortunately his spirits seemed pretty high. He was enjoying school; throwing himself into his studies. He had also received his work detail assignment and was really stoked about it. The Education Director had noticed his intelligence and work ethic, leading him to ask Edward to be a mentor to some kids at Meyer who were struggling academically.

He had been assigned two students to mentor: Marcus and Demetri, only fourteen years-old. Somehow they had slipped through the cracks of the Washington State Department of Education, and Edward said not only could they barely read but they also had trouble doing simple math. He spent a couple of hours with them each day, and so far he was really enjoying it.

The thought of him tutoring those boys just made me fall in love with Edward all over again. He was so selfless. He still hadn't opened up to me regarding his past, but I was trying to wait patiently for him to share that part of his life with me. Though I didn't know the specifics, I was sure that his childhood was not full of rainbows and butterflies. I was amazed that he had the ability to care so deeply about others when I was certain that no one had taken the opportunity to care for him. I knew he wanted to save those boys like he had saved me that night.

I had been fearful that once school started my visits to see Edward would have to decrease. Stuck in overprotective father mode, Charlie still wanted to spend his weekends with me, and I couldn't seem too eager to be rid of him or he would suspect that I was up to no good. Fortunately Charlie was scheduled to work the upcoming weekend shift.

Rose had said that I was welcome to ride with her whenever she went to see Jasper. Charlie wouldn't have to know where we were going; I would just say we were headed to Port Angeles or something. Sadly I knew that I wouldn't be able to use Rose as a chauffeur for long. Jasper was getting out in three weeks. I was happy for Jasper, but sorrowful for Edward. I hoped he wouldn't feel too alone in there without Jasper to make him laugh.

The weekend finally arrived, allowing Rose and me to hightail it out of Forks. Traveling with a fun companion who talked non-stop about high-school gossip made the three-hour trip fly by quickly.

I sat in the visitation room and waited for Edward to arrive. This waiting was the part of the visit that seemed to last forever. In contrast, once we were together, the hour seemed to end in a flash. I had missed his crooked smile, his crazy hair, and the warmth of his soft hand. We hadn't progressed any farther than holding hands and Edward didn't strike me as the type of guy who would want to make out in the visitation room. I was hoping to take matters into my own hands today by kissing him on the cheek. I couldn't wait to plant my warm lips on his cool skin.

I jumped out of my seat as the door opened and he walked into the room. He had gotten a hair cut, making his hair look even more disheveled. I was just happy that his eyes would no longer be hidden behind his naughty bronze locks. He was smiling as he approached me and I thought he looked the best I had seen him since he had been sent here.

He walked swiftly to our table and he engulfed me with one of his award-winning hugs, holding me tight against him. I loved the feeling of his entire body pressed into mine. I ran my hands up and down his back, trying to show him just how much I cared for him in the few seconds we had to embrace. The guard coughed to get our attention, and I pulled back slowly before darting my lips toward his face to feather the softest of kisses on his right cheek. I then pulled away and he took my hands in his as we both sat down in our uncomfortable folding metal chairs.

"Bella, God I missed you. How was your first week at school?"

"I missed you too, Edward. As for school, actually, it was much better than expected. Jasper's sister and her best friend Alice kinda befriended me. They are actually pretty cool."

He caressed my hand and smiled at me. "That's great, Bella; I'm glad you've made some new friends. Jasper speaks very highly of Alice, and since Rose shares the same genetic makeup as Jasper, I'm sure she's cool."

We spent the remainder of the visit holding hands and playing footsie under the table. He told me about the paper he was writing in his English class. Apparently he was to defend the legalization of marijuana, which was ironic considering he had never smoked or even actually seen pot. Therefore, he was having to do a lot of surfing online to research his arguments.

"I had to explain to the librarian here that I was looking up marijuana and drug use for a class. I don't think he believed me, because the next day they did a random inspection of my cell, saying they were searching for contraband."

We both laughed. I could totally see Charlie doing the same thing to my room if I had asked him questions about drugs.

When our hour was up, Edward hugged me again and then pulled my hand up to sprinkle it with kisses. He let his lips linger on my knuckles for several seconds and I could feel the warm moisture from his mouth on my skin. My skin was immediately covered by goose bumps. I had never reacted physically to anyone the way I did with Edward, and I could only imagine what would happen if and when we ever got the chance to actually kiss. I might explode with pleasure!

I was already counting down the hours till I would see him again next week.

The next week at school was mostly the same. Alice and Rose sat with me at lunch and I even went over to Alice's house one day after school to do "homework". Truthfully, we just gossiped, and she insisted on giving me a makeover. Charlie couldn't be more thrilled by my budding friendship with Alice and Rosalie. I hoped his decreased concern for me would encourage him to go back to his weekend activities away from the house, allowing me to see Edward more often.

On Saturday I once again rode with Rose to Meyer. Edward was still in good spirits and I was giddy because this time when I went to kiss his cheek, he kissed mine as well. I knew it seemed pathetic, but a girl will take what she can get when her man is in prison. Sometimes I laugh, thinking my life is like a bad country/western song.

It was Tuesday afternoon and I had just gotten home from school. I was standing in the kitchen, debating what to fix for dinner, when the phone rang. I figured it was Charlie calling to say he would be home late.

"Hello?"

No one replied, but I could tell someone was on the line. I listened harder. It almost sounded like someone was crying.

"Hello?" I asked again.

I heard my name being whispered through the receiver, so low I could barely hear.

"Bella . . ." I heard again, this time a little louder. This time I recognized the voice and my heart broke into a million pieces.

"Edward, is that you? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

I could here him sniffling and sobbing through the phone.

"No Bella, I'm not okay. I'm never going to be okay."

So, grab your kleenex for the next chapter. It's gonna be a tough one.

Please review! Reviews help the creative process!


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you to everyone who took the time to read and review. I apologize that I don't always respond, but I read each of your reviews and they fill me with extreme happiness. :)**

**Jailward is back and the angst is in full effect.**

**There is some disturbing sexual abuse in this chapter, so proceed with caution.**

**Special thanks to Jensy for amazing beta skills.  
**

Looking back, I should have realized that things were going much too well for me. I mean, who experiences some of the best moments of their life in _prison?_ Who actually enjoys being locked away for manslaughter? True, these two months of incarceration had been somewhat monotonous, yet I had never been happier.

The first weeks of lock-up I had spent on edge, but the horrible events I had expected to happen never materialized. Instead, I had fallen in love for the first time, made a loyal friend in Jasper, and entrusted the toughest C.O. at Meyer to watch my back. Understandably I started to let my guard down, naively forgetting about all the evil and destruction that could occur when a group of criminals were locked up together.

It was only a matter of time before my walls of contentment came tumbling down.

It all started on Tuesday (yesterday) when I was running late. Jasper had a test in chemistry and I went to his cell first thing, to help him with some last minute cramming before breakfast. Clad in just our underwear, we rushed to the shower room before the doors would get locked. We had participated in a late game of baseball the night before, and neither of us wanted to go through the day smelling like dried sweat and dirt.

Once we entered the shower room, we were assaulted by a wall of steam and the smell of cheap shampoo. Only a few guys were visible through the humid mist; most of the inmates had already headed to breakfast. We each found an available shower head and turned on the water.

I liked my showers to be almost boiling hot, so I stood off to the side waiting for the water temperature to climb to almost scalding. Once the steam really started rising, I dipped my body under the pounding stream, letting the glorious warmth soothe my tired body. Pushing the lever of the soap dispenser on the wall, I lathered a generous amount of green shower gel onto my hands and started lathering up my body.

I generally avoided any and all eye contact while in the showers and had forgotten about the other guys present until I heard a pained voice cry, "Please . . . please . . . no . . . stop!"

My head shot up and I tried looking through the steam to find the source of the cries.

Besides Jasper and me, there were only three other people in the showers, and they were all huddled in a corner on the other side of the room. A boy was cowering on the floor while the other two were standing over him, effectively trapping him in the corner. One of the assailants was James, the inmate that Officer Cullen had warned me about. I couldn't make out his accomplice.

Hearing the boy on the floor whimpering and crying, I involuntarily started to make my way over to them. I flinched as I heard a slap that sounded like a fist hitting flesh, followed by more cries. The whimpering voice sounded familiar. Was that Demetri?

Demetri was one of the kids I had been tutoring. He was only fourteen and had arrived at Meyer just a couple of weeks ago. He was a nice kid, and I often worried about him because his learning disability made him entirely too trusting of others.

There were lots of guys in here who would be more than happy to manipulate a kid like Demetri. He had already experienced cruel treatment at his old school, ultimately leading him here to Meyer. A kid had dared Demetri to bring a gun to school, and when he stupidly had accepted the dare, the kid putting him up to it had turned him in.

The thought of James similarly getting his claws in Demetri enraged me as I headed towards the trio in the corner.

After a few steps, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned my head to see Jasper standing behind me, looking worried.

"Edward, what are you doing?" he hissed. "You can't go over there—it's not your problem. Let's get out of here."

I was shocked at his lack of concern for the boy obviously being assaulted. "What do you mean it's not my concern? I can't just _leave_ him there!"

I turned back and headed to the corner again. This time Jasper grabbed my arm, pulling me to a halt. As he started talking again, I could hear the panic in his voice.

"Edward, believe me you do not want to go over there. That's James, and he is not someone you want as an enemy. He's killed people in here, though they were never able to prove it. If you get involved, you are committing suicide. Please Edward, I'm begging you. Walk away!"

I knew Jasper was only concerned for my wellbeing, but I couldn't live with myself if I didn't try to save this kid. I just had to act.

As I made my way closer to the corner, I realized that what I assumed was a younger inmate simply being bullied was actually something far worse.

Demetri was trembling in the corner, his knees to his chest, water mixed with blood and tears running down his face. He was shaking his head back and forth, chanting "No, no, no . . ." while the naked James stood inches away, menacingly stroking his own erect penis. The evil smirk on James' face was enough to make me nauseated as I quietly made my way closer. I overheard James speaking, his voice filled with vitriol.

"Demetri, I'm gonna give you two choices. You can open that pretty mouth of yours and suck my cock, or you can turn around so I can fuck your ass. It's your call. Either way, you aren't leaving here until you get me off."

The goon with James started laughing.

"Believe me, you want it in your mouth, kid. James likes it rough and your little ass ain't ready for that . . . yet."

James' cohort then reached down and clutched a struggling Demetri, restraining his arms tightly behind his back. He forced Demetri back down to his knees and shoved his head closer to James' crotch.

Witnessing the anguish on Demetri's face as James began to force himself into his mouth took my mind to a place I had tried for years to forget.

My heart rate skyrocketed and I began hyperventilating as the flashbacks overcame me.

_Rough hands holding me down, my face being forced into my pillow to muffle my screams. Rough hands pulling down my pajama pants. The excruciating pain as the faceless assailant violated me. His satisfied grunts. Wetness on my thighs. The salty taste of my tears as I cried myself to sleep._

I ran both hands over my wet hair, trying to force the horrid memories out of my head. I was on the verge of a panic attack and I closed my eyes to try to control my breathing before I passed out.

Clenching my teeth, I then channeled those memories of helplessness into something entirely different: rage. Much like the night I rescued Bella, I could feel my whole body tingle with hatred and anger and power. Before I knew what happened, I was across the room, hoisting up James by his shoulders, slamming him against the tiled wall; screaming the whole time.

"Get your fucking hands off him!"

James simply laughed, undeterred, and lunged at me. I was faster though, darting to the side; punching him in the ribs as he flew past me. He turned to face me again, a wicked smile still plastered on his face. His buddy came to stand next to him, cracking his knuckles.

"Aw Edward, I didn't know that you had a thing for the new fish. Don't waste your time; he turned out to be quite a disappointment."

Realizing that the two thugs no longer had their attention focused on Demetri, I lunged at James again while desperately shouting, "Demetri, run!" James adeptly evaded my attack.

I hardly wanted to square off against James and his crony since they were both larger and stronger than me, but I had to create a diversion for Demetri to escape, hopefully so that he could find an officer. The two menaces prowled around me as we sized each other up. James' smug grin further incensed me, and I decided that the best defense was offense.

As my fist made contact with James' nose, I heard the sound of bone crunching. My hand exploded in pain and I feared it was my bones that had broken. Immediately I felt the breath being knocked out of me as the two men began punching my stomach and ribcage, and my legs became weak as I crashed to the floor, water splashing from my fall. I closed my eyes, bracing myself for what would likely be the final moments of my life.

However, nothing happened. I heard the door to the showers swing open and I peeked through half-lidded eyes to see James quickly exiting the shower room. He looked back at me and scowled.

"This isn't over, Masen."

I closed my eyes again and let my head fall back onto the wet tile floor. The hot water had evidently expired and I began to shiver from the feeling of icy spray pelting my skin.

I tried to get up, but my weak legs folded as feelings of panic began to overtake me again. Embarrassingly I vomited onto the floor. I leaned against the wall, sliding down until I was crumpled in a fetal position on the floor, not unlike Demetri had been minutes before. I began sobbing uncontrollably.

The door to the showers slammed open and Jasper ran in, wearing only a towel, with Officer Cullen's bulky form leering closely behind him. Jasper's eyes widened when he saw me.

"Oh God. Edward, are you alright? Dude, this water is freezing!"

Jasper quickly turned off the showers while Officer Cullen bent down to check me over. I was still breathing rapidly and I could feel stabbing pain with every breath, leaving me worried that I might have a broken rib. I tried to stem the flow of tears and wiped my face with my hand, mortified that I had snot dripping off my chin.

"Edward, what happened?" I could feel the concern in Officer Cullen's voice.

He picked up my bruised hand and inspected my knuckles.

"I think your hand may be broken."

I was grateful to Jasper as he handed me a clean towel to wipe my face.

"So Edward, what happened in here?"

I knew I had to answer for how I had reacted. The thought that my misbehavior could interfere with me seeing Bella made me cry even harder.

"James and some other guy. They . . . they were trying to rape Demetri."

"Shit." Officer Cullen stood up and stepped toward the other side of the room, barking orders into his walkie talkie.

He came back and kneeled next to me.

"Dammit, Masen. Do you have any idea how much trouble you could be in? Or even worse; he could have killed you. Why didn't you go get help?"

"I couldn't leave Demetri, sir. I just couldn't."

"Look, I know you were just trying to do the right thing, but in here the _right_ thing is to find an officer. Do you want to go into solitary? I'm going to have a hell of a time convincing the warden not to throw your ass in there."

I let my head fall forward. "Officer Cullen, I know I should have found you, but I just couldn't. I was able to stop James just in time. He was seconds from putting his, you know, in Demetri's mouth."

I began crying again and looked up beseechingly at Officer Cullen.

"I couldn't leave him. I couldn't. A part of you dies when you are violated like that, and you can _never_ get it back. I didn't want him to become empty . . . like me."

I bowed my head again and heard gasps from Jasper and Officer Cullen.

"Come on Edward. Let's get you to the infirmary."

I winced as they helped me slowly rise to my feet. Thankfully Jasper handed me another towel to wrap around myself.

Officer Cullen went to Jasper and patted his shoulder.

"Hale, you did the right thing. You better get to class."

Jasper nodded and glanced sympathetically towards me. "I'll see you later, Edward. Take care."

Officer Cullen led me into the infirmary and where I was patched up. My ribs weren't broken, but my right hand was. I was now sporting a black cast up to my elbow.

After the doctor applied my cast, Officer Cullen came in and handed me some clean clothes. He shut the door and sat down in one of the infirmary chairs as I got dressed.

"So Edward, you wanna talk about what happened back there? Did James . . . did he, uh, touch you?"

I shook my head. "No, he was after Demetri."

"I'm here if you want to talk. And this is about as private of a conversation as you will ever get here."

He sounded genuinely concerned. I could feel my eyes welling up with tears again. God, why couldn't I stop crying?

"Edward, when you were talking earlier, you mentioned you didn't want him to be like you." Officer Cullen's big brown eyes blinked several times and my heart started pounding. "Did something happen to you?"

I retreated until my back made contact with the infirmary wall and then I slid down to the floor, pulling my knees to my chest. I nodded, promptly hiding my face in my knees. _Oh God, oh God._

"Was it here? Did James come after you?"

I shook my head.

"Was it while you were in county jail?"

I shook my head.

"Group home?"

I stopped breathing.

I nodded.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I didn't answer. I just hid my face and cried for my lost childhood.

"Sometimes . . . I think it would have been better if I had never been born," I finally whimpered.

"I, for one, am glad you were born, Edward. And I'm betting Isabella Swan feels the same way."

We sat in silence for what seemed like forever. Officer Cullen waited patiently for me to do something. I didn't know what to say, so I just pretended to be invisible.

Apparently the C.O. decided that if I wouldn't talk, then he would. In a quiet voice, he began speaking.

"I know what it's like to be aloneto not have a home."

I snapped my head up to look at him, my head still resting on my knees, but I didn't speak. He continued talking, as if anticipating my silence.

"I spent several years in foster homes and group homes too, so I know just how shitty they can be. I never had it as bad as you did, but it was still a miserable experience."

He sat on the floor next to me and pulled his knees up to his chest, mimicking my body position. I felt an instant connection to him.

"My mom had me when she was still a kid herself. She had run away from home when she was sixteen and she lived on the streets of Seattle; shacking up with whatever guy would have her. She was barely eighteen when got pregnant with me. She was naïve in regards to what raising a child would be like—I guess she thought it would be fun or something to have a baby."

He paused disdainfully. "She did try to do the right thing, for a while. She applied for welfare and got us some food stamps. We had a tiny apartment, but at least it was a roof over our heads."

He sighed. "Eventually the stress of being a single mom got to her. She grew to resent me, reminding me that I 'ruined her life' almost every day. When I was around four she would start leaving me alone in the apartment for hours at a time. I guess she figured I could make myself a bowl of cereal or something, and since I wasn't in diapers anymore, I would be okay without supervision."

With a far-off look, he continued, "Sometimes she would leave at night and not come back until the next morning. I'm not sure what she was doing, but I assume she must have been a prostitute, probably on drugs.

"I was terrified of being alone in that apartment. She told me that if I tried to leave while she was gone, they would take me away and lock me up. I was too young to know any better, so I believed her. All I ever wanted was for her to love me; to spend time with me. But she basically ignored me. Hell, I didn't even know my last name or when my birthday was until social services took me away. I'll never know who my father was. I don't even think she knew."

I had not really stopped my crying from earlier, but Officer Cullen's story made my tears flow a little faster. Why were there so many monsters in the world? And why did they take out their hatred on innocent children?

"One day when I was around five, I was home alone and bored, so I decided to go for a swim in the bathtub. I forgot to turn off the water, and soon it was pouring out of the tub while I played. I thought it was cool how the floor was filling with water. Well, the water started leaking into the apartment below and the super came into our apartment to see if a pipe had burst or something. When he found me all by myself, he called social services. They arrested my mom for neglect and without a second thought she signed away her parental rights." A look of sadness crossed his chiseled features.

"Since I was a big five year-old kid, I wasn't prime adoption material. Everybody only wanted little babies; they didn't want me. I was shuffled to several different foster and group homes until I was thirteen."

I sniffled and lifted my head up a fraction. "What happened when you were thirteen?"

"That was when my life changed completely. I was adopted and for the first time I knew what it was like to be lovedto be part of a family."

I was glad that Officer Cullen got a happy ending. I distinctly remember when my single biggest wish was for someone to adopt me. I had wanted it so bad I could taste it, back then.

"That's great. It seems like no one wants to adopt older kids. I was ten when I entered the foster care system and hardly any of the kids I knew were ever adopted. Everyone wants a cute little baby."

"Yeah, I was so lucky. It happened pretty randomly, actually. I was injured at football practice—I actually broke my collarbone. They took me into the ER and the resident physician taking care of me was really cool. He was young and funny, and since I didn't have any parents, he was constantly checking in on me. Since my group home was short-staffed, they couldn't spare to send anyone to get me until the next day, but that doctor stayed with me all night to keep me from being alone.

"I went back to the group home the next day and didn't think anything of that doctor again until a couple of weeks later. He showed up at the home with his wife and actually asked if I would like to come live with them. Naturally I jumped at the chance to leave that crappy home, and after six months of living with Carlisle and Esme, they legally adopted me. We moved to Forks a couple of years later. I can't imagine where I would be had they not entered my life."

We sat in silence for a while and then I turned my head to see Officer Cullen sticking his hand out, offering it to me.

"I figure I've already broken all the inmate/officer rules anyway, and since we are sharing, I may as well introduce myself. I'm Emmett . . . Emmett Cullen."

I smiled, grateful for him revealing even more of himself to me, and shook his massive hand. "Nice to meet you, Emmett. I'm Edward Masen, but I guess you know that already."

He smiled back.

Emmett paused for a moment. I could tell he wanted to ask me something, but he wasn't sure how to begin.

"Do you want to talk about what happened to you? If you don't feel comfortable with me, you could speak to our psychologist. She's really good."

I had never opened up to anyone regarding my life, but there was just something about Emmett that made me trust him unconditionally.

So I told him. I told him of my parents and how they died. I described being sent away to several foster and group homes. I told him about the physical, emotional, and sexual abuse I endured at the hands of some older boys. I told him about my last foster home, which hadn't been that bad. I told him about Bella and Biology class and about what happened that night at Port Angeles. I even told him that I loved her.

He listened quietly. When I was through and couldn't cry anymore tears, he put his arm around me to embrace me in an awkward side hug, as we were both still seated.

"It's only going to get better from here, Edward. I see big things in your future—good things. And for what it's worth, I'm pretty sure that Bella loves you too."

For the first time in a long while, I smiled.

"Have you told her? Does she know about your past?"

I shook my head.

"No, I'm afraid of what she'll think. What if she thinks I'm less of a man . . . that I'm tainted?"

"She won't think that, Edward. She deserves to know. Don't be afraid to open up to her."

I knew he was right, but I couldn't bear the thought of telling Bella. Would she even want to touch me after what those boys did to me? I was damaged goods.

I looked at the clock on the wall and noticed it was almost 4:00. I was shocked that we had spent almost the entire afternoon in this small exam room. I felt bad that my problems caused Emmett to miss lunch; I bet skipping a meal would be really rough for a big guy like that.

"So Edward, are you ready to face the real world again?" He patted his muscular six-pack. "I'm starving and I'm hoping I can sweet talk the ladies in the cafeteria to feed us something before supper."

Emmett was true to his word; we soon found ourselves alone in the cafeteria, shoveling in peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Emmett showed off his ravenous appetite by inhaling four sandwiches. It was very impressive.

Another officer came over and Emmett left me for a few minutes to confer with his colleague. When he came back he explained that James was being sent to solitary confinement for a month.

Emmett insisted that I not worry about James. "We will keep an extra eye on him. He thinks Jasper is the one who ratted on him, so hopefully he won't come after you when he gets out." Luckily Jasper would be home free long before James would return to the general population.

Emmett said I would receive some demerits for hitting James, but since I was coming to the aid of another inmate, I was being let off with just a slap on the wrist. He did warn me if I tried to pull a stunt like that again, I could lose my visitation privileges with Bella. That was all I needed to know. Next time I would get an officer.

The prison doc had checked out Demetri, pronouncing him in good health. I had stopped James before anything had really happened, and though the fourteen year-old was shaken up, he had already met with the prison psychologist and seemed to be doing pretty well, considering. I breathed a sigh of relief at the news.

Explaining that he had broken the rules by telling me his first name, Emmett insisted that I continue to call him Officer Cullen. He also was adamant that I consider speaking to the prison psychologist. He explained that he saw a psychologist as a teenager and it really helped him with his abandonment issues.

"Dr. Jen is really awesome. She will help you process all the shit that's happened to you."

I was unsure if I really wanted to dig deeper into the memories I'd fought so hard to repress, but I promised him I would think about it.

After our cafeteria pow-wow, Emmett led me to my cell. I had missed the day's classes, but since it was online coursework, I could catch up on everything tomorrow. Thankfully, I didn't have any assignments due today.

Though it was only the afternoon, I was physically and emotionally exhausted after the day's events. The second I saw my bed, I collapsed onto it, crying myself to sleep.

Jasper came in my cell right before supper to check on me. He wore a pained expression on his face, like he didn't know what he should say to me.

"Hey man, are you doing okay?"

"I've had better days, but I'm doing alright. How did your chemistry test go?"

"It wasn't bad at all. Thanks for helping me, bro."

We looked at each other for a few minutes, waiting for the other to start talking. Jasper gave in first.

"So Edward, did you really have _that_ happen to you?"

I bit my lip and finally conceded, "Yeah." Then I gave him a sharp look. "And don't you fucking tell anybody, Jasper. Do you hear me? Not your sister, not Alice, and definitely not Bella."

He put his arms up in the air in surrender.

"Come on, who do you think I am? Your secret is safe with me. And, just so you know, I think it really sucks that you went through that."

I got up to check myself out in my small mirror. My hair was its normal chaotic mess and my eyes were almost swollen shut from my copious crying. I had forgotten about the cast until I looked down at my arm, and the visual reminder made my hand and fingers throb with pain. It was worth it to punch that bastard, though.

I closed my eyes and thought about everything that had happened today. I needed Bella. I longed to touch her; to hold her. I wasn't ready to open up to her about my past, but I just wanted to talk to her, about anything or nothing at all. I felt that if I could just hear her voice, it would somehow make everything better.

Jasper asked me if I wanted to go to dinner and I told him what I really wanted was to call Bella.

"Then call her. You still have twenty minutes till the phones are cut off."

"That's easy for you to say, Jasper. I don't have any money."

Jasper laughed and handed me a calling card. "Dude, I've got like a thousand minutes on this thing. Go call your girl."

I quickly made my way to the payphones and much to my surprise, a phone was available. I dialed Bella's number, holding my breath until she answered.

Hearing her sweet voice say "hello" filled my heart with warmth and love. I was so overcome with my feelings towards her, I started crying again. I didn't want her to hear my cry, but it was too late. She said my name and asked if I was alright.

I seized up with anguish, experiencing the sharp contrast between her light, sweet voice and the darkness in my soul. I eventually choked out that I would never be okay, and then continued to cry into her ear. She whispered words of encouragement to me, promising that she couldn't wait to see me on Saturday. I barely spoke ten words during the entire exchange, but I did manage to thank her for everything before I hung up.

Nightmares interrupted my sleep, making me feel like hell when I woke up. I decided to skip the showers today as I couldn't face that scene, instead heading straight to breakfast with Jasper. We were both quiet this morning, muttering a few words but mostly just listening to the sound of our own munching on the tasteless corn flakes they gave us.

I was in the computer lab working on an assignment when Officer Cullen came in.

"How are things going today, Edward?"

I gave him a wary glance, and slowly responded, "I'm doing better today, thanks."

"Well, you have a visitor this morning. So, come with me."

"A visitor? Who?"

"Not sure. I think it's your lawyer."

I couldn't figure out why on earth my lawyer would be visiting me. Maybe he had some forms for me to sign or something? Officer Cullen led me to the attorney visitation rooms and opened the door to the second room on the right. I looked in, gasping when I saw Bella standing in the room by the table, her arms folded across her chest, waiting for me.

She met my eyes and we both smiled. Her eyes looked puffy. Had she been crying too?

Officer Cullen grabbed my arm as I walked into the room.

"Edward, this is a situation that will likely never be repeated. I'll be standing right out here. You have one hour. I expect you to behave like a gentleman."

He shut the door and for the first time ever, I was alone with Bella Swan.

**AN: Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think. Your reviews fuel my writing addiction.**

**I know parts of this chapter were hard to read. I didn't enjoy writing it, and I promise no more sexual assault for Edward ever again. He is moving on to the healing chapter in his life. Bella will be the glue that holds everything together. I hope I didn't scare anyone away. This will not be a "dark fic".  
**


	9. Chapter 9

**Jailward returns! Sorry for the delay. Sick kids and then hubby went away on business. **

**I've tried to make up for the wait with some fluff. I hope you all enjoy.**

**Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, and pimped my story out on the forums. I really appreciate it!**

**Disclaimer: S Meyer owns all things Twilight. I just take her characters and lock them away in prison. No money being made here!**

**Special thanks to Jensy for being the best beta ever. **

BPOV

Several minutes had passed since I had hung up with Edward, and I sat silently on my dad's old, faded couch, staring numbly at the phone. The last time I had felt this helpless was that night in Port Angeles. What on earth had happened to my dear, sweet boy?

Edward had been inconsolable on the phone. He had spoken very few words, and honestly, I hadn't been able to understand what he was saying when he did speak. I had just let him cry, offering words of love and encouragement as best I could.

I came close to telling him that I loved him, but held back. Over these last weeks of flirty emails and electrifying handholding in the visitation room, I had finally come to realize that I had indeed fallen in love with Edward Masen. I was eager to share my feelings with him, but decided that it wasn't the right time. I knew that confessing my love to him on the phone may have given him a moment of comfort when he desperately seemed to need it, but I really wanted to tell him in person. You only get one chance to profess your love for the first time, and I wanted it to be perfect.

I was heartbroken from our brief conversation. Something horrible had happened to Edward today; I was sure of it. My mind was consumed by frightening images of typical occurrences in prison, and I was simply terrified for him. I only wished that I could somehow protect him like he had protected me, but I knew that was a foolish dream.

I had asked him several times what had happened and he never answered. Because he had been so upset, I hadn't pushed him for more than he was willing to share. Hating the fact that I had no way of truly comforting him, I could only hope that he would open up to me when he was ready. It made me want to cry to think about him being locked away in that wretched place, all alone. I just had to trust that his precious, sensitive soul could survive three more years at Meyer.

Suddenly having an epiphany, I grabbed the phone, punching in the number for Rose. Maybe Jasper had called her today and mentioned something? As I waited for the call to connect I felt my mouth tighten with anger, wishing I had thought of this idea earlier.

Unfortunately Rose hadn't heard from Jasper today and it was past calling hours, so she couldn't reach him tonight. She seemed worried for me and offered to call Alice, hoping that maybe she could help us. I wondered how on earth little Alice Cullen could possibly help me find out what happened to Edward, but Rose seemed determined. She promised to call me back as soon as she could.

Knowing that Charlie would be home any minute, I dashed into the kitchen to check on dinner. I kept one eye on the clock and nearly jumped out of my skin when the phone rang, startling me.

"Hey Bella, it's Rose. Look, I talked to Alice and she called her brother to find out what happened to Edward."

I was confused; I didn't even know Alice had a brother. And why would he know about Edward? Was her brother a juvenile delinquent too? It seemed crazy and disturbing that we all might have loved ones in prison.

"Alice's brother?"

"Yeah, her brother Emmett. He's several years older than us. He is an officer at Meyer."

The name Emmett rang a bell. I recall Charlie talking about some kid named Emmett that he had mentored a few years ago, sounding quite fond of him. I hadn't realized that he was Alice's brother.

"What did he say?"

"He wouldn't tell Alice much, only that Edward was in a fight today and that he was really upset."

"Oh no!" I gasped. All I could picture was Edward wounded and bleeding with no one there to take care of him.

"Rose, is he okay?" I begged.

"Emmett didn't say. He could get in trouble for telling us about the fight, but Alice told him that you were really worried after Edward called you crying."

Oh crap. I hoped Emmett wouldn't tell my dad about Edward. I would be screwed.

Rose resumed, "I'm sure Emmett would have mentioned something if Edward was injured."

"I don't know. He sounded so broken on the phone. Whatever happened, it was really bad."

"You should go and see him tomorrow, Bella."

"I can't skip school! Charlie would find out and then I would be grounded forever."

"Just tell him you're sick. He has no reason to not believe you. You are a good girl after all. You can even take my car, so your truck will be in the driveway. That would be less suspicious."

I was certainly tempted by Rose's idea. Edward would be totally surprised, and if I could just make him smile once, it would be worth the potential consequences of my father busting me.

"Okay, I'll do it. You're sure you don't mind me driving your car?"

Rose drove some crazy expensive red BMW that probably cost more than Charlie's little house.

"Not at all, Bella. I'll have Alice meet me at your house around seven and then she can drop me off at your place after school. I'll want to hear all about your visit with Edward. I hope he's okay, and hopefully my idiot brother wasn't involved."

"That sounds great, Rose. I just hope Charlie doesn't come home and find me gone tomorrow."

She laughed. "Sorry, I forget that you are a novice when it comes to deceiving the parental units. Just tell him you are having female problems. Throw in words like _bloating, cramping_, and _heavy flow_. Your dad will likely run away screaming, and won't come anywhere _near_ your room."

"Rose, that is completely disgusting. You are brilliant."

"I just consider myself resourceful."

I thanked her again and hung up the phone.

Soon after, Charlie walked through the front door. He took one glance at me and frowned. "Bella, what's wrong? You look like hell."

I realized he must be referring to my swollen eyes. I'm sure I looked horrendous, but thinking quickly on my feet, I realized that my blotchy complexion could play in my favor when it came to making him think I wasn't feeling well.

"Yeah, I'm having really bad cramps tonight. It's like the period from hell."

Charlie turned paler than a ghost and mumbled something unintelligible as he quickly exited the room. Despite my worry for Edward, a tiny grin lit up my face. Rose was brilliant.

I woke up the next morning, padding down the stairs to locate Charlie before he left for work. I explained that I was still feeling really lousy from the cramping and nausea, and I felt like it would be best if I just stayed home. He told me to get some rest and then made a hasty exit. Witnessing the look of sheer discomfort on his face, I wondered what would happen if I asked him to buy me some tampons. I figured it was entirely possible that he would pass out, and I couldn't risk that happening today, but I did file away that evil plan for later if necessary.

Shortly after my dad left for work, Rose and Alice showed up. They came inside to wish me luck and I left in Rose's car while they headed to school in Alice's car.

I made it to Meyer more swiftly than usual, zipping along in Rose's smooth sports car which was so much faster than my old truck. Visiting hours had just begun and I readily endured the standard visitor protocol.

An officer escorted into the visiting room, where I was about to sit down when a tall, strapping, very well-built officer approached me. He towered over my small frame, but he wasn't frightening. He smiled as he came closer and I found his dimples to be adorable. This must have been Alice's brother. My suspicions were confirmed when he came close enough for me to read "Cullen" on his nametag.

"Isabella, how are you? I'm Alice's brother, Emmett."

"Hi," I replied before being unsuspectingly swept up in what could only be referred to as a bear hug. I feared suffocation, but he quickly released me.

Emmett noticed I was blushing and he smiled again, apologizing for his forwardness.

"Sorry, Bella, I've heard so much about you from your dad over the years, I feel like I know you."

"Yeah, my dad's mentioned you a few times as well. I had no idea you were Alice's brother."

"Yep, Alice is my little sis. It surprises most people since we look so different. With Alice being so tiny and me being so . . ."

"Huge?"

"We can't all be little, you know. The world needs big guys too."

Emmett was delightful. I was totally smitten by him, in a big brother kind of way.

"So, I take it you are here to see Mr. Masen?"

"I am. Emmett, what happened to him? Is he okay? He called last night and he was so upset—I couldn't get him to tell me anything."

"Edward got into an altercation with another inmate yesterday, Bella. He was injured, but not seriously. I won't go into details; that is Edward's story to tell. I _will_ say that his reasons for fighting were honorable."

"So he's alright?"

"He's as good as you can expect while locked up in this joyous establishment, Bella. Follow me and you can ask him yourself."

I was a little confused, but dutifully followed Emmett towards the back of the visitation room. We were approaching the dreaded limited visitation area that I had been forced to use when Edward was first incarcerated. My heart fell. I really wanted to be able to offer Edward the comfort of my touch, which would not be possible with the plexi-glass partition between us. I sighed loudly as my eyes began to sting, threatening the onslaught of tears.

I was moments from crying, begging Emmett to not do this to us, but surprisingly he strode past the limited visitation area and made his way to a solid metal door on the back wall. He opened the door and motioned me into a hallway. The white walls and shiny floor of the hallway gave off a very sterile, almost hospital-like feeling.

There were several doors along the wall, each with a corresponding number. Emmett led me to the farthest door on the right and opened it. He flipped on the light and I found myself peering into a small room with a wooden table and two chairs. The room was windowless other than the small glass opening on the door. I was puzzled. Why would I be meeting Edward here?

"Bella, this is a room that is generally reserved for meetings between inmates and their attorneys. By law, they are allowed to meet with legal counsel without being observed or recorded. I've spoken with the warden and I have received permission for you and Edward to have one hour in this room."

My jaw dropped, and Emmett continued, "I'll be standing outside if you need anything. If you feel threatened or if you believe that Edward is putting you or himself in danger, there is a red panic button located under the table. Press it and I'll be inside within a few seconds. Otherwise you can knock on the door if you need me."

I nodded and smiled at this wonderful hulk of a man. He was allowing me a private visit with Edward! I was tempted to kiss his cheek, but I didn't want to seem too eager.

"You can't really think Edward would ever do anything to hurt me, right?"

He smiled wearily at me. "Bella, places like this bring out the worst in most people, and besides that, Edward's life has been filled with more pain and heartache than you can ever imagine. Don't forget that it was violence that got him put in here."

He paused, noticing my sudden scowl.

"Look Bella, I really like Edward. I think he's a good guy who has been dealt a bad hand. I am pulling for him one-hundred percent. I know if he works hard he will get out of this hell hole and go far in life. But I wouldn't be doing my job as an officer and as a friend of your father's if I didn't warn you. Okay?"

"I'll be careful, Emmett. But I'm not afraid of Edward. He would never hurt me."

Emmett nodded and shut the door, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I stood by the table, restlessly fidgeting with my blouse and my watch and my hair. It seemed like I had been waiting for Edward interminably long, and I was becoming tense and impatient. I kept thinking of Edward in pain from the fight. Would his handsome face be marred from battle? I fought the tears again. I couldn't cry. I needed to be strong for him.

The sound of the door opening pulled me from my ruminations. Gloriously Edward walked in to the room, totally halting when he saw me. He looked broken yet beautiful standing there in his blue jumpsuit. He was obviously surprised to see me, his eyes wide and his mouth hung open. I quickly looked him over and found no wounds on his face, but I did notice a bulky black cast on his left arm. I longed to kiss the pain away.

A bright smile replaced his look of shock, and he quickly made his way toward me.

He drew me into his arms, lifting my feet off the ground. He held me tightly to his chest and playfully twirled me around. Then he returned me to the ground and pulled back slightly to gaze intently into my eyes.

"I can't _believe_ you're here Bella. When I walked through that door and saw your face, it was better than any Christmas morning I've ever had."

He bent down and kissed my cheek.

He had raised one hand to tuck the loose strands of hair behind my ear. I was now rubbing his back with my hands, secretly tempted to snake them around front to caress the muscular planes of his chest.

Edward flinched, seeming to realize something. "Wait a minute. Bella, you're supposed to be in school. You're gonna get in trouble!"

I lifted up my hand to trace my fingers along his prominent jaw-line.

"I'm taking a sick day. Charlie won't suspect a thing."

He grinned, his green eyes sparkling.

"And here I thought _I_ was the delinquent. It seems you may be a bad influence on me, Ms. Swan."

I looked deep into his eyes and continued stroking his face.

"Edward, what happened yesterday? I was so worried after you called. Emmett said you were in a fight. Are you alright?"

He didn't answer right away, so I took his hand in mine and led him to the table, guiding him to hop up and sit on the table top, his legs dangling.

"You're hurt."

I picked up his arm and inspected his cast, examining the parts of his hand extending out of the plaster. I could see that his fingers were swollen; his knuckles covered in purple bruises.

I lifted his hand to my mouth and kissed the tip of each finger and then slowly made my way up his hand, now kissing his knuckles tenderly, lingering for a second on each bruise, as if willing them to heal. He seemed to hold his breath while I feathered kisses on his wounded hand.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?"

He shook his head, but his eyes betrayed him. Determinedly I ran my hands through his hair, scrutinizing his head and face, almost like monkeys inspecting their young in the wild. It was erotic to be so close to him, and I craved his touch. However, my overwhelming concern for him made me doggedly pursue my mission of checking his injuries.

I didn't notice anything of concern, but I wasn't convinced, so I moved down to his shoulders, arms, and legs. I breathed a sigh of relief, believing that he seemed the picture of health.

Finally I stepped between his legs and looped my arms around him, embracing him tightly. I felt him wince and I immediately pulled back, looking into his eyes questioningly.

"Your chest!" I reached towards his collar and began unbuttoning his jumpsuit.

"Bella, what are you doing?" he choked out.

"I'm just checking you out. Making sure you're okay."

"I'm fine Bella. It was just your typical fight. I broke his nose; he punched me in the gut. That's it. I promise."

He had his hands clasped around my wrists, but he didn't stop me from unlatching two more buttons. I flayed open the jumpsuit, exposing his upper chest. I gasped when I saw the mottled, purple bruising rising up from his stomach. The injuries looked incredibly painful, tarnishing his seemingly perfect chest.

I bit into my lower lip to keep from sighing as I took in his small brown nipples and the downy brown hair covering his chest. God, he was beautiful. Not wanting to tear my gaze away from the glory that was Edward's bare flesh, I reluctantly began buttoning up his jumpsuit, patting his chest lightly over his clothing when I was done.

"This looks like more than just a typical fight, Edward. What happened? You were so upset last night. Please trust me. Tell me what happened."

He put his head down and closed his eyes, sighing. After a few moments, he glanced back up and met my eyes.

"I saw two guys attacking a younger kid in the showers. They were holding him down and they were going to . . . um . . . they were going to . . ." he paused, like he couldn't say the word. He then whispered so I could barely hear him, "They were going to rape him."

Tears began streaming down his face.

I felt my throat tighten, agonizingly watching my beautiful boy crying, and I wasn't sure what to say.

"Oh my God, Edward. And you stopped them?"

"Yeah, I stopped them. This time. I saw what was happening and I thought of you and what you went through and I just lost it, Bella. It was like I left my body, like I was watching from the outside while it all went down. It was the same feeling I had that night in Port Angeles. It was like I couldn't control my actions anymore."

He leaned forward and rested his head on my shoulder.

"I can't bear to see people assaulted that way, Bella. It just brings out the worst in me—I-I-I become a monster."

"You aren't a monster, Edward. You're my hero."

"A hero wouldn't have killed those men who hurt you. I'm a monster."

"The guys from yesterday, did you hurt them?"

"I broke the one guy's nose, and didn't get a shot at the other. They are both in solitary for a month."

I leaned in and kissed his forehead, lovingly.

"If you are a monster, what does that make me?"

He looked at me, confused. "What do you mean?"

"If you are a monster then I must be something far worse, because despite it all, I'm totally and completely in love with you."

There was a second of complete silence between us.

"Really?" he whispered.

"Without a doubt. I love you Edward Masen,"

He smiled gratefully, like he had just received a beautiful gift, and his eyes welled up with tears.

"I love you too, Bella."

I leaned in towards his face and softly touched my lips to his. I felt a jolt of excitement as our lips collided, completely stimulated by our intimacy. I released him and then instantly kissed him again, this time with a little more force, and he responded by capturing my bottom lip between his own.

We continued kissing for several magnificent minutes, just lovingly ensnaring and imprisoning each other's lips. It was pure. It was divine. It was perfect. It was love.

Edward lifted up and began placing soft kisses on my eyes, my nose, the corners of my mouth; then he trailed kisses from my ear down the line of my jaw to my neck. The sensation of his warm, wet lips was heavenly and I moaned in pleasure.

My soft moan was the sign Edward had been waiting for. He leaned in to kiss me with an increased vigor, caressing my lower lip, teasing me with a playful dip of his tongue, which I eagerly reciprocated.

Edward moaned into my mouth and scooted himself forward on the table, pulling me tighter into his embrace. I could feel his thighs tightly clutching my hips, surrounding my body with his masculinity and his woodsy scent. I was consumed by the heady sensations of his tongue in my mouth, his strong torso pressed up against mine, and his hands on my back—skating their way down to my bottom, pulling me toward the heat between his legs. I could feel his arousal through his thin jumpsuit, and I was shocked by how its hardness contrasted so greatly with the softness of his face and hands.

Kissing Edward, touching him, smelling him, melting into him—it was the closest to heaven I had ever experienced. Being without him was no longer an option.

Too quickly, we heard a knock on the door and Emmett's voice announcing "Two minutes."

I reluctantly pulled away and began straightening Edward's hair. My hands had caused his coif to look more disheveled than usual and I didn't want Emmett to discover that we had been behaving inappropriately during our visitation. I had heard the term "sex hair" before, but had never fully comprehended it until today. Edward was exuding sex, with his wild hair, his swollen lips, and his flushed face. He slid off the table and nervously straightened his prison uniform. He adjusted himself and looked at me, blushing. "Sorry about that. I can't really control it."

I blushed back and laughed. "It's okay. It's kind of flattering, actually."

After a minute our appearances were respectable and we said our goodbyes. Edward assured me that the boys he had fought with wouldn't be a problem, since they were in solitary. I made him swear to stop trying to save the world, and to ask the officers for help in situations where others were in danger. I couldn't bear to think of him injured again.

I promised to flood his inbox with emails before I would make another visit on Saturday.

Wryly I informed him, "It's going to be hard to see you and not be able to kiss you, you know."

I knew that what we had shared today was likely a one-time thing in prison; it could be years before we would be allowed this level of intimacy again.

"I'll carry the memories of this moment forever, Bella. Just knowing you love me, being able to see your face, holding your hand—that will carry me through the next three years. And then I'll be able to court you properly and smother you daily with kisses."

"I can't wait for that day, Edward."

The door opened and Emmett stepped inside.

"Okay lovebirds, time's up."

Another guard came to the door and Emmett motioned toward Edward.

"Masen, Officer Pattinson will escort you back to the library. Isabella, you can come with me."

We walked toward the door together, our hands entwined. Edward pulled my hand to his mouth and kissed it gently. Releasing me, he lifted his hand to caress my cheek while whispering "I love you" in my ear. He reluctantly walked away with the guard and I watched him until they turned the corner, and he was gone from my line of sight.

As Emmett walked me out, I begged him not to inform my dad of my visits. He assured me he had no plans to tell Charlie, and said if my dad found out he had allowed a private visitation, he would be in as much trouble as me. I gave him a hug goodbye and made my way to Rose's BMW.

The trip home was uneventful and before I knew it I was crawling into bed.

That night I dreamt of kissing Edward Masen. It was the best dream of my life.

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**Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed the fluff. Please take the time to review and let me know what you think; good or bad. **

**You can thank all those photos of RobPatz barechested for having me throw a little more lovin b/w Bella and Edward than I was originally planning. I nearly combusted looking at his abs. *swoons***

**I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I can. Probably sometime next week!  
**


	10. Chapter 10

**Jailward is back! Sorry for the delay. I was totally consumed by my Age of Edward entry. **

**Check it out at .net/s/5147782/1/An_Aquarian_Exposition**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I just put them in prison.**

**Special thanks to Jensy for her awesome beta skills. **

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EPOV

It had been the best day of my life, hands down. I had a huge, goofy smile on my face as Officer Pattinson escorted me back to the library. Making up the class work I had missed the day before did not seem daunting at all—I could do _anything_, riding the high I was feeling—and I completed my assignments happily. Several times throughout the day I thought back to that hour in the visitation room.

I had kissed Bella. I. kissed. Bella! And even better than that; Bella had kissed me back.

_I immediately noticed Bella as I entered the visitation room. I could see that she had been crying and quickly made my way over to her, drawing her up into my arms. I barely heard the door closing behind me as I twirled Bella around, ignoring the pain in my chest and hand from my altercation with James. _

_I was alone with Bella, and a million dirty thoughts entered my mind. I was a seventeen year old boy, after all. I quickly pushed the perverted images from my mind and decided that I would simply follow Bella's lead regarding the depth of our intimacy in this private room. I would wait forever if I had to._

_Bella was alarmed by my injuries and looked me over like a mother hen. I closed my eyes and tried to keep from moaning as she ran her hands along my scalp and then moved to my arms and legs. I was hard the moment she placed her hands on me and I prayed she wouldn't notice. _

_Imagine my surprise as she began unbuttoning my jumpsuit to look at my torso. I bit my bottom lip as she gently touched my chest. She was concerned about the bruising on my ribcage and stomach but I promised her I was alright. I was filled with relief when she returned my jumpsuit to normal; being only half dressed in the presence of Bella Swan was dangerous. I was afraid I might lose my resolve for letting her lead our physical relationship, and I certainly didn't want to scare her by kissing her before she was ready._

_Our moment together took a serious turn when she asked me about what had happened in the showers. I explained that I had saved a young inmate from being defiled, shamefully admitting that I had become violent much like I had in Port Angeles. I didn't confess the real reason I had lost control. I wasn't ready to tell Bella about my past. A small part of me still feared that she would find me disgusting, knowing I had been touched that way by a guy. I hoped one day I would have the strength to tell her everything, from my parents' untimely deaths to my miserable existence in the group and foster homes._

_Bella's reaction to my self loathing was completely unexpected. She told me she loved me—that she was in love with me. I was overcome with emotion from her admission. Tears poured from my eyes at the notion that this beautiful girl could love me. My mother had been the only other person to tell me she loved me and I hadn't heard anyone say those three words to me since the day she died. I had considered my heart long since dead, but I was sure that I felt it spring to life in my chest under the gentle, supple touch of Bella's hand._

"_I love you too, Bella."_

_She shocked me even further when she leaned in to kiss me. The feel of her soft, warm lips on mine was exquisite and I immediately captured her bottom lip between mine. We kissed over and over, enjoying the feel of each other for several glorious minutes. _

_I became brave and began trailing kisses along her face and neck, whispering "I love you" after each soft kiss. I opened my mouth slightly while kissing her neck, and gently let my tongue taste her soft skin. She tasted so clean and fresh, and her unique scent was like a drug to me, pulling me in deeper. I longed to suck and lick her flesh wantonly, but knew it was too soon for such brazen behavior. This woman would be the death of me._

_As I swept in for another taste of her collarbone, she let out a moan. The sound was filled with lust, causing me to lose control and capture her lips again, letting my tongue enter her mouth for the first time. She kissed me back willingly and the feel of her tongue against mine was incredible. My only other experience with kissing had been quite a turn-off, but this kiss with Bella was simply exquisite, and I finally understood why everyone made such a big deal over making out. I could kiss Bella forever. I promised myself that if she was still around when I was released (and I prayed for this to be the case), I would do just that._

_My hands wandered down her back and we continued our deep kisses. I grazed my palms against her bottom and drew her into me, forgetting until it was too late that my erection was very obvious, now pressed against her stomach. _

_The sensation of a stunning girl flush against me in that state was like nothing I had experienced before, and I thought I might die from arousal. I prayed with every ounce of strength I had that I wouldn't come in my pants. I couldn't imagine a more embarrassing scenario—Bella would likely be appalled and run away screaming. My inner monologue chanted "Don't come, don't come, don't come," over and over, as I continued kissing Bella lovingly. I knew I should pull away and give my body a moment to cool down, but I didn't know if this chance would ever present itself again, so I continued with the kisses and caresses until I heard Emmett announce that we had two minutes._

_I reluctantly pulled back and laughed at Bella's appearance. Her eyes were hooded with desire and her hair was beyond disheveled. Her lips were blood-red and swollen and I could see a faint mark on her neck where I had apparently sucked a little too hard. I hoped her dad wouldn't notice, but I couldn't find it in myself to regret my actions. My inner caveman grunted at the notion that I had marked her as mine. Bella looked like she had just spent an hour necking in the backseat of her father's car and I figured I looked just as bad._

_Bella began straightening her hair and composing herself as I tried to tame the beast that was busy trying to escape the confines of my pants. I discreetly attempted to shift things around so my erection wouldn't be obvious and looked up to see Bella staring at my crotch with a look I could only explain as hunger. _

_I blushed when she met my eyes. "Sorry about that, I really can't control it."_

_She smiled and replied, "It's okay. It's kind of flattering, actually."_

_Bella promised to email me and said she would try to visit again on Saturday. I was thrilled that in only three more days I would be seeing her again._

_I made sure Bella knew how grateful I was for today and how I would carry this moment with me forever. I was about to lean in and kiss her again when Emmett flung open the door announcing, "Okay lovebirds, time's up."_

_I gave her a chaste kiss goodbye and then I was being led away by Officer Pattinson._

I was still smiling at dinner that night and it didn't take Jasper long to pry the day's events from me.

"That's awesome, man; it gives me hope. I figure if a sweet girl like Bella could be into your convict ass, then maybe I really do have a shot with Alice. What I wouldn't give to get her alone in a visitation room. First, I would kiss her lips, and then—"

"I get your point, Jazz," I interrupted. "I really don't need a play by play of something that is never going to happen because you are too scared to tell Alice how you feel."

"I've only got two weeks left in this shit hole and if I've learned anything from this incarceration experience, it's that life is too short. I'm gonna tell her. The worst that can happen is that she will say no."

I laughed. "Yeah, that and your sister may kick your ass. Alice is her best friend after all."

"I'm not afraid of Rose, and I figure if you have the balls to stand up to Chief Swan by dating his daughter, then I can handle my sister."

"I'm not standing up to the Chief, Jasper. He has no idea that Bella comes to see me. So be careful of what you say when you head back to Forks, because I don't want him finding out. I'm sure he would ban Bella from coming here."

"If Bella's dad finds out about you two, the only place Bella will visit you is at the Forks Cemetery. Chief will kill you. I mean, rumor is he has a room in his house filled with nothing but weapons and ammunition. With him being a cop and all, he could find a way to make it look like self defense."

Jasper was laughing now, and though I laughed along with him, secretly I did harbor some fear towards Bella's father. I desperately hoped for a real future with Bella and I would definitely need her dad's blessing for that to happen.

I spent the hours alone in my room replaying my hour with Bella over and over in my head. Just thinking of kissing her made my body respond in new and exciting ways,and that night I decided to end my self-imposed no-masturbation rule.

The rest of the week went by quickly. The detention center had been quiet following my fight with James. The other inmates seemed to keep their distance and a few even nodded their respect to me when I passed them in the halls. Apparently very few souls had ever actually stood up to James and I had a feeling that I would be left in peace for quite a while due to my new "rep" as a badass.

Bella came with Rose to visit me on Saturday. The girls brought brownies for Jasper and me, and naturally we inhaled them like two vampires that had gone without blood for weeks.

I could tell that the atmosphere between Bella and me had changed. The air between us was charged with an electric sexual tension, making it impossible to keep our hands off each other. We were discreet with caresses, but I did manage to slide my chair so close to her that the entire side of my body pressed into her. It was hard to be that close and not kiss her, but I knew we wouldn't get far before the officers made us pull apart, and I wanted better for us. We did sneak in a couple kisses as she left; I hoped that would tide me over until her next visit.

Jasper was counting down the days to freedom and we threw him his own release party the day before he was to be sent home. I was thrilled that he would be able to return to the normal life of a teenager, but I was sad to see him go. He was the first friend I had made in a long time and I had enjoyed having an ally on the inside. He promised to visit before solemnly handing over his ipod, calling card, and comic book collection to me, as mementos of our friendship.

Officer Cullen was kind enough to allow me to accompany Jasper to the prison entrance to say goodbye. I could see who I assumed were his parents as well as Rose waiting for him in the parking lot.

"I guess this is goodbye, huh?" I asked.

"Yeah, for a little while. I'll be up to visit and you can call my cell whenever. Take care of yourself, Edward. Watch your back in there."

We gave each other the obligatory man hug, maintaining a safe distance between us the entire time but still managing to convey our mutual affection.

"Jazz, take care of Bella for me, okay?"

"No problem, man. Maybe I can score points with Alice for being such a nice guy!"

I shook my head. Jasper had it so bad for Alice. If he didn't make his move soon, I was going take things into my own hands, maybe enlisting Bella's help on the outside.

I grinned as I watched Jasper embrace his family. Everyone was smiling and I could feel the love his parents had for him all the way from where I was standing. Watching their easy laughter, I realized that I envied Jasper's relationship with his parents much more than I did his freedom.

My smile vanished and my throat tightened as I was suddenly overcome by grief. I missed my mother so much. I rarely allowed myself to think of her and the times we shared, because it hurt immensely.

I sighed and began walking back towards the cell block, with Emmett by my side. He seemed to sense I was feeling down and patted my shoulder reassuringly.

"I know you're sad to see Jasper go, but he'll keep in touch. He's a good kid."

"Yeah, I know. I'm happy for Jazz. He doesn't belong here."

"No he doesn't. And neither do you, you know."

I nodded. It felt good to have Emmett see me for me and not for my violent acts.

Still replaying the image of Jasper being embraced by his mother, I asked, "Are you close with your Mom?"

"Esme? Yeah, you could say we're close. She's always been there for me, even when I was being a total jackass." He flashed his characteristic smirk. "I'm probably closer to Carlisle, though. I was in the middle of puberty when they adopted me and I guess I was just more comfortable going to him when I needed help with things, you know?"

I nodded, though I didn't really know because I never had anyone to go to until now.

"But Esme never treated me like I was adopted. She came to each of my sporting events, including the away games. She always wore a shirt that said _Emmett's Mom._ I would act like it embarrassed me, but I secretly loved it. And she would always stay home with me when I was sick, even after I graduated from high school. She would spend the whole day going out of her way to make me feel better. She's such a good mom. Why do you ask, Edward?"

"I don't know. I was just thinking about my mom, I guess."

Emmett paused as we approached an empty guard station. He opened the door and motioned me inside.

"Step into my office."

He shut the door behind us and sat down at the desk. I pulled a chair over towards him and sat down.

"Tell me about your mom."

I hadn't spoken of my mother in years. The last time was with a court appointed therapist after my parents' deaths.

"Her name was Elizabeth . . . I can't remember her maiden name. She was Italian. My father met her when he was stationed in Italy for the Army.

"She was beautiful—she had this dark, curly hair . . . and her eyes—they were this amazing green color?" I felt my nose burning with the threat of imminent tears. "She had a thick accent, but her English was very good. She taught me some Italian, though I can't remember much anymore. She was a great mom; she was perfect. She stayed at home with me while my father worked, and we always had fun together."

My vision was blurred by tears as I stared down at my hands. Emmett just let me talk. "She had attended art school in Italy and was an excellent musician. I learned how to play the piano from her."

Tears fell as I allowed myself to revisit long buried memories of my mother.

"She was so happy in the weeks before her death. She was pregnant and had finally found a way for us to be free."

Emmett looked at me with a confused expression.

"Free? Free from what?"

"My father," I answered bitterly.

I spent the next hour relaying the traumatic events of my childhood and the horrors I experienced at the hands of my father. It was painful to rehash all those memories, but it felt good to get everything off my chest. I had only shared bits and pieces with the lawyers and therapists after my parents' deaths and this was the only time I had ever shared the full story. I don't know what it was about Emmett that made me want to bear my soul.

Emmett didn't say a word until I was finished. His eyes were pained and we both sat silently for a few moments after I had stopped speaking.

"Wow. I saw the notes in your record, but I had no idea it was that bad. If there was an award for worst childhood, you would certainly be in the top five."

I smiled slightly. Emmett always found a way to lighten up the conversation.

"Edward, I know I've mentioned this before, but I really think you should talk to Dr. Jen. I know she could help you. I couldn't help but notice that you place some of the blame of what happened to your mother on yourself."

"I don't know, Emmett."

"Look, I'll talk with her and set up an informal session with her. Can you give it a try? If not for me then do it for Bella. She deserves a happy, healthy boyfriend, right?"

Emmett knew my weak point, so I reluctantly agreed to see Dr. Jen next week.

He escorted me back to my cell and I listened to Jasper's ipod to unwind from another draining day at Meyer. I nearly died from laughter when I discovered he had two 'N Sync albums downloaded. He would never hear the end of this. Maybe that's why Alice wasn't interested—who in the hell would want a man with such crappy taste in music?

Another week passed by unceremoniously. I had my first appointment with Dr. Jen set up for the following week, and I thought about asking Emmett to cancel it several times but then I thought about a potential future with Bella and I decided that I had to at least try therapy. She deserved a better man.

Jasper was doing a good job of staying in touch with me and was enjoying life back at Forks. Now that he was considered a "bad boy", he had girls fawning over him. He was enjoying all the extra attention, but was a little miffed that Alice didn't seem as impressed with his new status.

Jasper did, however, let me know that Bella's birthday was in a few days, and for that I was indebted to him forever. Bella and I had never discussed birthdays. Missing her birthday would have been unacceptable and I was grateful for my friends keeping me in the loop.

I worked hard to devise a surprise for her birthday, making Jasper my go-to-guy. I hated that I wouldn't be with her when she got her surprise, but I knew she would be visiting me soon afterwards, and that made it okay.

Two days before her birthday, an officer approached me in the cafeteria and told me to come with him. I wasn't concerned, because I was due to report to the Education director regarding the two kids I was tutoring. I figured that was where the officer was taking me.

I was a little confused when we passed the education building and entered the visitation area. He led me to the private visitation block, and stopped in front of the very room I had met with Bella a few weeks ago.

"Wait here for a moment."

Coming from the room were heated voices which ceased when the officer knocked on the door.

"Officer Cullen? I've got Inmate Masen."

The door opened and Emmett strode out.

He wore a pained expression, and his face was flushed. I was now deeply concerned. Had something happened? Was Bella okay?

"Is something wrong? Is Bella alright?" I asked worriedly.

"Bella's fine."

I breathed a sigh of relief.

"You've got a visitor, Edward." He motioned to the open door. "I'm so sorry."

Still confused by his behavior, I entered the visitation room and my heart fell as I took in angry brown eyes, a full mustache, and the nametag "Chief Swan".

I closed my eyes, hoping this was a dream, but when I opened them again, Bella's father was still there, emanating a ferocious intensity that instantly had me on edge.

I didn't utter one word. I mean, what could I say in a situation like this?

The Chief pointed at the empty chair in front of me and growled, "Masen, I think you and I need to have a little talk."

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**Stick with me! We all knew Charlie would figure things out at some point. The angst was needed to balance out all the recent fluff.**

**Next chapter is in progress and I hope to have it up next week. **

**Please take the time to leave me a review. I read and appreciate each and every one of them. I've been lousy at responding, but know that I squee like a fangirl when I receive one.**

**We will find out about Edward's parents' death, I promise. It will all be revealed in due time.  
**


	11. Chapter 11

**Jailward is back! It's only been a few days since the last update, and I hope you are as excited as I am to read what's next. Charlie was screaming in my head to tell his story.**

**Thank you for all the lovely reviews. I cherish every one and I'm making an effort to answer them all. Thanks again.**

**Special thanks to Jensy, my beta goddess. She works miracles and had this chapter back in 8hrs. Thank you bb!**

**Grab a kleenex and come aboard the angst express!**

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**BPOV**

My epic make-out session with Edward certainly added a spring to my step. Alice and Rose came by to reclaim Rose's car and they knew something wonderful had happened the moment they saw me.

"Spill it, Bella!" leapt out of Alice's mouth as I opened my front door.

"Who says I have anything exciting to share?"

"Cut the crap. I haven't seen you smile like that since you moved to this god-forsaken town. You saw Edward today and something good must have happened."

"She's right, you know," Rose agreed nonchalantly. "You look like you're about to burst."

So I did what every other seventeen year-old girl does after kissing her boyfriend for the first time. I told my best friends all about it.

The girls oohed and aaahed as I described Edward's kisses. I did keep some things to myself, like the feel of Edward's erection pulsing against my stomach. They didn't need to know everything, after all.

Charlie came home as we giggled together in the living room. After mentioning several times over the summer how he wished I had more friends, he seemed genuinely pleased to see Alice and Rose.

Ever the charmer, Rose hopped off the couch and hugged a very startled Charlie.

"Hi Chief Swan. We came to check on Bella and to bring over her missed assignments."

Rose batted her eyelashes lovingly at my father and he was completely disarmed by her feigned innocence. Rose was a professional. I could learn a thing or two from her about how to work over parents to get what you want.

"Um, hi girls. Bells, are you feeling better?"

"Yeah dad. I feel much better. The cramps seemed to have passed, and the bloating is gone too."

I couldn't help myself. Charlie's face was priceless. He looked like he might throw up.

"Well, I'm glad you're back to normal. I figured you wouldn't want to cook tonight, so we can head out to the diner after your friends leave."

"Sure Dad, that sounds great."

Charlie, still appearing uncomfortable, darted quickly out of the room.

Rose and Alice laughed with me before they headed home. I spent the evening eating with my dad, though in my daydreaming mind I was with Edward Masen the whole night.

The rest of the week flew by and I kept busy at school. Edward and I exchanged several emails, and he always managed to put a smile on my face.

On Friday night I spent the night at Rose's house, where we made brownies for Edward and Jasper. Rose may have acted as if she disliked her brother, but she really was a softie, always bringing him a treat when she visited him.

Rose drove us to visitation on Saturday, and Edward and I spent the entire hour touching as much as possible, careful to avoid the prying eyes of the officers. It was difficult to be so close to him and not be able to actually do anything. It's amazing how I was able to go almost eighteen years with no kisses whatsoever, and now after only three days, I thought I might die without the touch of his lips on mine.

I would involuntarily lick my lips as we made eye contact and I could see in his eyes how difficult it was for him not to attack me right then and there. I did sneak in two chaste kisses before he was escorted away. They weren't near enough, but they would get me through until the next time I could visit him.

It wasn't long before Jasper was released from Meyer. Rose and Alice were so excited to have him back, and though I was happy for Jasper, I could not deny the twinge of sadness I felt, knowing that Edward would be losing a good friend on the inside.

It didn't take Jasper long to get back in the swing of things at Forks High. He was an instant celebrity and several girls followed him around like the paparazzi. He seemed to dig the attention, but did not appear to be romantically interested in any of his admirers.

Alice continued to hide her feelings for Jasper, simultaneously pretending to ignore him altogether while also shooting death stares at his groupies. It was comical, and I was almost to the point of telling Jasper myself about Alice's true feelings.

When Jasper began eating lunch with us, I enjoyed his presence immediately. He was sweet and funny; I could certainly see why Alice was in love with him as well as why Edward had trusted him so quickly.

I couldn't help but feel like Jasper was my impromptu body guard because it seemed he was always around when I dropped my books or tripped in the hall. The morning I accidentally locked my keys in the truck, Jasper swooped in to pop the lock and retrieve my keys before I even had a chance to ask for help. A part of me sensed who Jasper was doing this for, and that made me love Edward a little more.

My birthday was approaching and I had yet to tell Edward about it. I honestly never thought to mention it to him until a few days before, and by then it seemed tacky to say "Hey Edward, guess what? My birthday is tomorrow." It just seemed self-serving and I didn't want him to feel obligated to get me a gift. It's not like they had gift shops in juvenile detention. And honestly, the only gift I _really_ wanted couldn't be bought in a store.

I was reminded that I had no idea when Edward's birthday was and I made a mental note to ask him the next time I saw him.

I was forced to skip visiting Edward the Saturday before my birthday. I was really bummed about it, but my dad had made plans for us with Billy and Jacob Black. I had hardly seen Jacob since school started and I knew I had been neglecting our friendship. We grilled out at their house—Jacob and I caught up on each other's lives while our dads watched football.

I told Jacob all about Rose and Alice, but conveniently left out my visits to Edward. He wouldn't understand and I feared he would tell my dad. Jacob didn't seem to suspect anything and it was nice spending some time with him.

It was the Wednesday before my birthday and I was surprised to find Charlie home from work. I could only remember one other time that he gotten home before me, and I was filled with concern that something was wrong when I saw his cruiser in the driveway.

"Dad? Is everything okay?" I shouted as I walked through the front door.

He didn't answer, so I threw down my backpack and walked into the kitchen. He was sitting at the table and on his face was a look I had never really seen from him before: anger.

"Dad, what's wrong?"

He didn't say one word, instead sliding an envelope across the table towards me.

I was filled with nausea as I saw the words _Meyer Juvenile Detention Center_ typed in bold across the top of the envelope.

Finally he spoke. "Bella, I need you to explain this to me. Apparently they seem to have you down as a registered visitor to Edward Masen. I thought it must be some mistake, but then I called and they informed me that you have been to Meyer to visit inmate Masen _thirteen_ times since he was incarcerated."

I panicked. This was bad.

"Dad, let me explain."

"Explain what, Bella? That you have been lying to me for weeks about your whereabouts? That you have been driving several hours to visit a violent inmate? That you purposely defied my wishes and initiated contact with someone I specifically forbade you from seeing?"

I didn't think Charlie had ever spoken so many words to me in a single day, much less in a single conversation. I was terrified—I had never seen him so upset. Though my voice was trembling, my words conveyed my passion.

"Dad, Edward's my friend. He's in prison because of me. He saved my life! Why can't you see that? He could have walked away and let those guys kill me, but he didn't. He put himself in danger to save me."

I was speaking frantically, feeling the walls of despair crashing down on me. I was screwed. My days of visiting Edward were over. I had to do something, _anything,_ to make Charlie see beyond his jaded vision of Edward.

"He's violent and unpredictable, Bella. And I asked you to stay away from him."

I had always considered my father's issues with Edward to be ridiculous and frankly I had had enough.

"He's not violent! I don't understand where you are getting this from. You can't tell me you wouldn't have reacted in the exact same manner as Edward if you had stumbled upon those men assaulting me. You would have killed those guys, and you know it!"

I had started crying at some point and I could feel the tears running down my face. I wasn't losing Edward without a fight. Charlie was silent for a few moments, like he was pondering my words. I had never spoken to him this way and I'm sure he never expected me to begin shouting at him.

"I bet your knight in shining armor has never told you about his family, or his past, am I right?"

"I know his parents are dead and that he was shuffled through foster care since he was ten. Why?"

Charlie got up from the table and grabbed my arm, pulling me towards the front door.

"Dad. Where are we going?"

"It's time you learned a little more about Edward Masen."

We drove silently to the station. I was extremely annoyed with my father, and I couldn't imagine there would be anything he could show me that would change my feelings towards Edward. I knew in my heart that he loved me and that he would never do anything to hurt me. My father was overreacting, plain and simple.

The station was quiet, with only one officer on duty. Charlie led me to his office and told me to sit down. He disappeared for a few moments and came back with a thick green folder labeled "Masen, Edward". He opened it and pulled out a smaller manila folder stuffed with papers. He sat those down on the desk and ordered me to read.

The papers were photocopied pages of a criminal record of Edward Masen Sr. I assumed this was Edward's father. There was a fuzzy picture of a man in his late twenties and I couldn't help but notice the resemblance Edward had with his father. The disheveled head of hair seemed to be hereditary. His father was handsome, but his eyes portrayed a coldness I had never seen in Edward's.

The senior Masen had accumulated multiple charges of assault as a teenager. Several years passed without any incident, but then he was arrested three times between 1997 and 1998. All the charges were for domestic assault and one was for assault of a minor. There were descriptions of the bruises and wounds found on the bodies of the victims and I was nauseous from the knowledge that Edward's own father was responsible for causing him such pain. Had anyone ever shown him love? I made a mental note to tell him I loved him more often.

Since Edward's dad was in the military, the cases were transferred to the US Army at some point, leaving no information in the civilian police files as to what happened after the arrests. The last few pages of the file were of a homicide investigation from 1998. I noticed immediately the names Elizabeth and Edward Masen as the victims.

I had figured his parents had died in an accident of some sort and was shocked to read that Edward's mother had been killed by her own husband, who had then committed suicide. My tears flowed freely as I read that Elizabeth had been seven months pregnant, and then I began bawling when I learned that Edward apparently had witnessed the entire event.

I felt like I was going to be sick and I closed the file, unable to read another word. Why did my dad insist I read this? What did this prove? Edward had been a victim his entire life. If nothing else, I would think this would make my dad feel bad for the cards Edward had been dealt.

"I can't read anymore, Dad. This is horrifying. What is this supposed to prove, anyhow?"

He laid down a second file on the desk. "Read it," he ordered, flatly.

If my father considered this to be punishment for defying him, it was working. I had no desire to see what horrors lay within that second manila folder. Feeling my dad's hard gaze on me, I opened the file.

It was the criminal record of an Anthony Masen, who appeared to be Edward's paternal grandfather. His rap sheet was pages long. He had been in and out of jail his entire life. He had several charges of assault, armed robbery, and attempted murder. He had been sentenced to life in prison at age thirty-five, after killing four men in a drunken brawl at a bar in Chicago. He had died in a prison fight several years later.

Shutting the folder, I slid it across the desk, towards my father.

"Okay, Dad. What is the point of showing me Edward's tragic family history?"

"Did you notice a trend, Bella?" Not waiting for an answer, he continued.

"The men in Edward's family seem to have a problem with controlling their temper and resorting to violence. After what happened in Port Angeles, it appears that trait was passed on to your friend. He's a danger and I won't have you getting involved with him. He's a ticking time bomb and one day his victim is going to be someone close to him."

Unbelievable. My father was delusional. So this was the reason he didn't want me to see Edward? There was no way in hell he was going to use this unfair guilt-by-association technique as a reason to keep me away from him.

"Dad. This is ridiculous. How can you blame Edward for the sins of his father and grandfather? These events have nothing to do with the man Edward has become. I can't believe you could judge him this way. If I recall, your father was an alcoholic. Does that give people the right to go ahead and write you off as a drunk? Should I start pouring out your beer to prevent your obvious binge drinking?"

My voice became a bit snide as I continued, "You are bound to become as dependent on alcohol as your father, Dad. I guess that means I must be sneaking airplane bottles of rum into school every day, because my grandfather was a drunk."

"Bella, that isn't the same thing."

"Yes it is, Charlie. I'm sick of you judging Edward and I'm sick of hiding how I feel about him. Guess what, Charlie? I love him. There, I said it. I love him. He loves me too. It's going to take a lot more than a bunch of old criminal files to make me change my mind about him."

I ignored the scandalized expression on my dad's face, forging on, "Edward Masen has the most genuine soul I have ever seen. He has been tormented his entire life and yet all he wants is to be loved and to do something good with his life. He was well on his way to getting out of Forks and going off to college where he could get a fresh start, but he sacrificed it all. He sacrificed it all for ME. He put his entire future on the line to keep those men from hurting me. Did he over react somewhat by killing them? Yeah, probably. Does he feel guilty for ending the lives of three people? Yes he does."

I drew a deep breath, and continued my rant. "He's not a monster, Dad. And you know damn well you would have killed those men too if you had been there. The only difference is, you are a man with a badge and you would have walked away scot-free. Edward was just some poor foster kid with no one on his side, so he got the book thrown at him.

"You should be _thanking_ Edward Masen for what he did. You should thank him for bringing a ray of sunshine into the life of your daughter. You can't forbid me from seeing him, Dad. I'll be eighteen tomorrow and I don't need your permission to see him. I love him and I'm not turning my back on him. There is nothing you can do to stop me from seeing him."

I was embroiled in such an emotional rage that I hadn't really paid attention to my dad through the entire outburst. I closed my eyes for a moment and I was startled by the sounds of my father crying.

I glanced at my dad and he looked terrible. He was sobbing into his hands, letting out a pitiful moan. I had never seen my father cry. He rarely displayed any emotion at all and though I was angry with him, I was now fighting off the urge to comfort him. Finally his sobbing ceased and he looked up at me with red eyes.

"Bella. I've handled this situation so badly. I'm your father. I'm the one who is supposed to protect you and keep you safe."

He sighed, looking regretful. "You've lived thousands of miles away from me your entire life, and I've always felt second best to your mother. I could tell you never wanted to come visit, and that you couldn't wait to get out of Forks after the two weeks were up. It made me feel like a terrible father to see how unhappy you were to visit me. That's why I was okay spending a couple of weeks in California with you every year. You seemed happier that way and I thought maybe you would grow to love me a little more if you enjoyed yourself."

"Dad, I—"

"Let me finish. When your mother called and said you wanted to come and live with me last year, it was one of the happiest days of my life. I finally had my little girl back. I couldn't wait to get to know the woman you've become. And having you here has been wonderful. I know I'm not very social and that I have to spend a lot of time at the station, but never doubt how much I love you."

He paused, and the muscles lining his jaw rippled. "Last spring, when you were attacked . . . I felt like a complete failure. _I_ was supposed to be the one to keep you safe, not some kid. I guess I just resented him for doing what I considered to be my job. Then I saw his history and that his father and grandfather were murderers, and I just freaked. I would die if anything happened to you, Bella. I was just trying to keep you safe. But I can see now, I've gone about it all wrong."

The love I felt for Charlie right then and there was overwhelming.

I made my way over to my father and we embraced. My dad wasn't the touchy feely type and I couldn't remember ever feeling him wrap his arms around me so tightly. We held each other for a few minutes, both of us crying.

I pulled back, staring into his brown eyes; brown, like my own. "Dad, you should meet Edward. Get to know him. He's really a good guy. He doesn't belong in Meyer. He belongs with a family that loves him and supports him. I can see from the file you showed me that he's never had that. Get to know him. It would mean a lot to me, and I think you would be surprised at what you may find."

"We'll see, Bella. You aren't totally off the hook, by the way."

Shit. I totally thought I had him disarmed.

"I'm still angry with you for forging my signature on an official document, as well as lying to me about visiting Edward."

"But Dad! You never would have signed that slip."

"You're right, I wouldn't have. But I'm still the parent here, Bella, and I'm not thrilled by your dishonest behavior. You're grounded for a month."

My jaw dropped but he ignored my shocked reaction, continuing to lay down the law: "No visits to see Edward and no visits to see your friends, since I am quite sure Rosalie Hale and Alice Cullen were in on your little trips to Meyer. And Jasper Hale is hardly a good influence for you either."

He just kept going. "In a month we can discuss the Edward Masen situation and figure out how we are going to handle it. I'm not pleased by your admission that you have romantic feelings for that boy, but I'm willing to come to some sort of an agreement with you about him, _if_ you can prove to me over the next month that you can behave like a trustworthy adult. "

His words were bittersweet. He might allow me to continue my romance with Edward, which was awesome! However, I was grounded for a month, which meant no Edward for an inordinately long amount of time. The thought of being separated from him for thirty whole days was heartbreaking. I had become so dependent on his smiles, his touches, and kisses. A month would seem like forever to me.

However, I would obey Charlie's wishes. He was rightfully angry with me for lying, and I knew that if I disobeyed him this time, I could kiss my relationship with Edward goodbye. This Edward-hiatus would be difficult, but at least I had email and maybe even the phone to get me through it. Charlie never said I couldn't call Edward.

I had a difficult time sleeping that night, thinking of Edward and how he had witnessed the violent deaths of his parents. I wondered if there were other horrors he was hiding from me. I hoped he would eventually open up to me about his past, but I wouldn't push him, especially since I couldn't say that I would be eager to share such horrors if the tables were turned.

The next morning I awoke and noticed that Charlie was already gone for the day. I found that odd, since he wasn't scheduled to work until noon, but didn't question it as I went to school.

My birthday was only one day away and the only gift I really wanted was sitting alone in a cell at Meyer Juvenile Detention Center.

_______________

**Whew. What an emotional chapter. I hope this answered some questions and as you can see, Charlie did mean well. He needed a kick to the pants and Bella wasn't afraid to do it. I wonder why Charlie left home before Bella got up? hmmm.**

**Reviews are love.**

**Also, thank you to those who nominated Visitation for the Twilight Indie Awards. I am beyone flattered. I was nominated for Best AU/Human WIP and Most Original Storyline. Voting starts July 8th, so go and vote for your faves!**

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	12. Chapter 12

**You're eyes aren't deceiving you! It's an update!**

**Sorry for the long delay. RL has taken over this summer and allowed little time to write.**

**Special thanks to Jensy for being such a beta goddess. I owe a great deal to her.**

**Thank you Twigasm Podcast for mentioning Visitation in your second episode. That was a huge surprise and I'm flattered.**

**Disclaimer: Twilight is all S. Meyer. I just own a bunch of Dora DVDs and a minivan.**

I pulled out the small wooden chair and flinched at the sound of the legs scraping against the tile floor. My throat was constricted with fear. I sat down slowly, never letting my eyes leave Chief Swan's face. I could feel my heart-rate speed up, and to counteract my rising dread, I tried to slow down my breathing. Having a panic attack in front of my girlfriend's father would be unacceptable.

I knew there was only one thing that would bring Chief Swan to my doorstep  
and that was the knowledge that Bella had been here to visit me.

The look in his eyes was menacing and I prayed he possessed better self-control than  
my own father. When my dad had looked at me this way, it meant I was about  
to become intimately acquainted with his belt.

I hoped the Chief wasn't here to hurt me, but I would never underestimate parents protecting their children. My mother had made the ultimate sacrifice to save me, so I knew that if Charlie considered me a threat to his daughter, he would fight furiously to keep her safe. In this way, Charlie and I were similar. We would do anything in our power to protect Bella Swan.

I turned my head to sneak a glance at the closed door and unfortunately saw no one beyond the little square window. I was completely alone. I prayed that I could find a way  
to dig myself out of the grave I seemed to be standing in, swallowing me whole.

Now I understood how an animal felt when approached by a predator in the  
forest; a stronger, more powerful predator. My adrenaline rush cued a "fight or flight" moment, but I knew either response would be futile. Charlie Swan, with his vast experience at subduing unruly citizens, could have me helplessly pinned down long before I made it to the door. If only Emmett were here with me—he wouldn't let Charlie cause me harm. Well, at least I didn't think so. Upon further reflection, I began to doubt that Emmett would endanger his career and friendship with his mentor to help some punk inmate.

Unknowingly I slouched down further in my chair.

Charlie still hadn't spoken a word and though I was sure only a minute had actually passed, it felt like I had been trapped in this room for hours. I wished he would say something, anything; I longed for just one word to break the silence. Even yelling would be better than this hushed tension, his dark eyes glaring at me.

Charlie lifted his hands from his lap and placed them on the table, and then began to crack his knuckles. Feeling sickened, I closed my eyes; the sound reminded me of the night I had saved Bella. I would never forget the sound of breaking a man's neck with my bare hands. That crunching _snap_ would haunt me for all my days.

Charlie coughed, obviously trying to get my attention, and I opened my eyes to meet his gaze.

"I'm guessing you know why I'm here, Masen."

"Bella," I whispered.

"It came to my attention yesterday that my daughter has been visiting you here at Meyer. Imagine my disappointment upon discovering my daughter has been lying to me about her whereabouts for months."

I looked down and stared at the ragged laces on my cheap white sneakers.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you," Charlie growled.

Instinctively I sat up straighter in my chair. "Sorry, sir."

"Did you ask Bella to visit you, Masen?"

"No, sir."

"She came to you on her own?"

"Yes, sir."

"Why?"

"She was my friend. She wanted to thank me for what I did that night."

"Why didn't she just send you a letter?"

"She did, actually. And then she came to visit. I was as surprised as you were."

"I somehow doubt that," Charlie mumbled sardonically.

Silence enveloped us once again. I could see that Charlie had more to say, but he seemed to be struggling to find the right words. He opened his mouth to speak, but then stopped several times.

"I'm a man of few words, Masen, so I'm just going to spit it out. What are your intentions toward my daughter?"

So there it was. . . the proverbial "Do you want to get your hands down my daughter's pants?" challenge. Such an old, overused question, yet delivered in such a new, unusual situation. I glanced around me at the prison walls, feeling surprisingly grateful to be asked this question here; to be asked to express my intentions and my opinions, like they somehow mattered. Maybe this grizzled police chief was actually going to give me a chance? If so, it would be one of the first times in my life that a male authority figure would bestow such a gift upon me.

I sensed this was my opportunity to make Charlie see that I was different than the typical Forks High student, who considered drinking and casual sex to be perfectly normal behavior. I wasn't that kind of guy, nor would I ever be. I hated drinking after seeing what it did to my dad. And, I was a mate-for-life kind of guy, much like the trumpeter swan. I inwardly smiled, remembering Bella's last name.

I had to make Charlie realize that I only wanted a chance to love and worship his daughter; to take care of her needs completely. I would never hurt her.

He was looking at me, annoyed by my delay in answering.

"I love her," I blurted out.

Charlie's reaction was initially one of complete shock, but then he began laughing. Anger I could handle, but laughing? This couldn't be a good thing.

"You've got to be kidding me. You love her? That's just your hormones talking, Masen. You have no concept of what love is, son."

I was terribly hurt by how quickly he downplayed my feelings for Bella. I might be young; I might have zero experience with girls, but I had no doubt that what I felt for Bella was love: pure and unconditional love. I'd been surrounded by enough hate and deception in my short existence to know that what I felt for her was real.

"I know you think I'm no good for Bella. People see this prison uniform and automatically assume that I'm some violent, unscrupulous asshole."

_Way to go, Masen—curse in front of the one person who controls your happiness. Brilliant!_

I uncomfortably cleared my throat. "I'm not like that at all. I've always followed the rules. Until that night in Port Angeles, I had always done what I was told. I had never come close to doing anything illegal. I was probably the only kid at Forks High who had never tasted alcohol or smoked a cigarette."

"Besides Bella, you mean."

I stammered, "Y-Y-Yes, sir."

Taking a deep breath, I forged ahead: "All I've ever wanted was to get out of the foster care system and build a life of my own. College, medical school, marriage, kids, a house in the suburbs . . . that is what I really want. And I know that I may be young, but I have no doubt that what I feel for your daughter is love. I would lay down my own life to save hers, and though I regret that I took three lives back in the spring, I would do it again if put in a similar situation."

I was a little frightened by my sudden mouth vomit.

"I know it's hard to envision your daughter dating someone in my situation, but I think we all know that if I wasn't a ward of the state and could have afforded a real lawyer, I likely would have gotten off with community service and probation. It was just bad luck that I had no family or money on my side when one of the guys who attacked Bella had plenty of money and influence. I'm not making excuses, though. I took three human lives and deserve to be punished for it. But I can promise you that if you allow me to continue a relationship with your daughter, I will never do anything to hurt Bella. Her happiness and well-being are extremely important to me."

Charlie sighed and rubbed his temple. "You're right, Masen. It's difficult for me to stomach my daughter being friends with you, especially with my experience in law enforcement. But what really concerns me is what I've read about your past, from the physical abuse by your father to the sexual abuse in the foster system.

My stomach clenched with shame. _He knew?_ He knew about my awful past? Did Bella know too? Charlie seemed not to notice my sickened response and kept speaking.

"I just worry how that could shape a person, you know? So many of the guys I've arrested, for terrible, terrible things, had abuse similar to yours when they were kids. And I guess I just don't feel like I can trust you with my daughter."

Once I recovered from the shock of his words, I reflected upon them, discovering that I couldn't fault Charlie for his fears. I worried every day how my evil past would shape me as an adult. When it came to protecting a girl as beautiful and precious as Bella, I would likely feel the same way if I were in his shoes.

I sat up as straight as I could and leaned forward. Until this point I had maintained a totally submissive position, but I needed the Chief to know I would fight for Bella.

"What can I do to earn your trust, Chief Swan? I'll do anything you ask. Just please, don't take Bella away from me. She's the only reason I have to keep going. She makes me want to be a better person; to become the man that she deserves. I'll respect your wishes, even if it means I can't see Bella anymore, but please give me the chance to show you that I am more than just a punk kid with a criminal record."

"Hmm," Charlie mumbled as he rose from his chair and walked towards the door.

_Shit,_ I thought, _he was leaving?_ I had opened my mouth and screwed everything up.

"Chief, please. I love her," I called out, turning to aim my words at his retreating form. I was desperate for him to hear me. "My whole life, I've never asked for anything; I've tried never to complain."

Memories flooded me—sad, brutal images, including multiple occasions when I had considered taking my own life. Not once since I had met Bella had I contemplated suicide, and I had to figure out a way to communicate what she meant to me. I had to get through to this man who held my future in his calloused hands. "Bella . . . she gets me. She loves me, and I can't bear the thought of not having her in my life."

I didn't realize I was crying until I felt tears dripping from my face.

"Chief, please just give me a chance to prove myself. Please."

"Calm down Masen. I'll be right back."

He knocked lightly on the door and exited. His abrupt departure made me numbly gawk at the door closing behind him.

Bella's father held my life in the balance and I truly had no idea what he was going to do. On the one hand, he really hadn't been as hard on me as he could have been. I would have expected him to yell and threaten me, but that had not happened. I still didn't get the vibe that he particularly liked me or the current predicament he faced, but I hoped that my groveling had affected him somehow. I just couldn't imagine how I could continue without Bella in my life. Without her, I had nothing.

Several minutes had passed and I eventually put my head on the table in an attempt to stay calm. I willed myself to stop crying.

The door started to swing open and I lifted my head, noticing Emmett coming into the room with Chief Swan.

The Chief sat down across from me again and Emmett leaned with his back against the wall, his imposing physical presence building even more testosterone in the room.

"Okay, Masen, I've spoken with Emmett and given your request some thought. I don't really like the idea of you having a relationship with my daughter, but Bella seems to be crazy about you. She's typically a very good judge of character, and up to this point, she's never done anything to make me mistrust her. And Emmett here seems to think you are a good kid who deserves a chance."

I looked over and Emmett and he winked at me. I tried to fight it, but a small smile escaped.

"So, I'm not going to keep Bella from coming to see you. However, there will be rules. If these rules are broken, you can kiss your relationship with my daughter goodbye."

This was good news; I could live with rules. I just hope he didn't insist that we keep confined to the limited visitation area. Not being able to touch Bella would be torture. But, if that was what he wanted, I would respect his wishes—I'd be miserable in the process, but respectful. He was going to allow Bella to see me and that was something that made me forever grateful. I wouldn't let Charlie down.

"I'll do whatever you ask, Chief Swan."

Charlie cleared his throat.

"Rule number one: You are to continue your studies at the community college and maintain a minimum of a B average in every course. C's are unacceptable and will result in Bella's visits being restricted. If the class is hard and you don't think you can pull a B, then get a tutor. No exceptions."

Though I was surprised to hear that he cared about my grades, I thought that stipulation was fair and reachable. I was a good student and I expected to get straight A's this semester. I had never received a C in my life and I didn't intend on starting now.

"Rule number two: You are to stay out of trouble here at the detention center. Emmett explained an incident you were involved in a couple of weeks ago, and though you seemed to be acting on the behalf of a helpless kid, that's not an excuse to get into a fight. Keep your nose clean, stay away from the troublemakers, and follow the rules. Emmett will be watching you and I'll know if you misbehave. You need to prove to me that you are better than this place. You say you aren't like the other kids here; well, show me with your actions."

After the incident with James, I had no desire to fight anyone. I didn't really have any friends here, partly because the other inmates still avoided me following the fight. I would just have to be extra diligent in paying attention to my environment, trying to stay uninvolved.

"Rule number three: You are to continue attending counseling sessions. Emmett says he set things up for you but that you've been only once. I think this is a great opportunity for you to work through all the crap that you dealt with in your childhood. If you really love Bella, you need to make sure you are healed. She deserves the best, and the only way you can be that for her is if you get help. When the doc thinks you've progressed enough to no longer need therapy, you can stop. Until then, no counseling means no Bella."

_Fucker_. This would be the hardest condition of all for me to meet. I knew the words he spoke were true, but I also knew that in order for me to "heal", I would need to rehash all the ugliness I had experienced in my seventeen years. The thought of talking about my father or the foster homes made me nauseated.

I had only gone to see Dr. Jen the one time and actually it wasn't that bad. All we ended up discussing was the weather of the Pacific Northwest, and a little about music. She had asked me several questions and wanted me to tell her about myself, but I had avoided her prying inquiries fairly adeptly. If she had been annoyed with me, it had not shown. I had told her I would set up another appointment later, but that was already two weeks ago. I guess I would be spending lots of time in her office, and my chest tightened at the prospect.

I just hoped I wasn't too broken. I hoped I could be fixed somehow.

"And lastly, I figure I need to get to know the kid who thinks he's so in love with my daughter. Bella tells me I'm wrong about you and that you are special. She's never held any interest in a boy before and initially I was chalking up her feelings to puppy love, but if it's true that this is something more than that, then I need to see it for myself. Since you aren't in Forks, I'm going to come here and meet with you. I want to know what makes you tick, Masen. I'll come every few weeks and we can have a little chat, you know, _mano a mano_."

Great. Meetings with the dad. Maybe counseling didn't sound so bad after all. What in the heck would I find to talk about with Charlie Swan? Gun control? Politics? Baseball? He would probably find me to be incredibly dull. But then again, maybe that was what he was hoping for.

"Am I understood?"

I nodded. "Yes, sir."

"Good. Bella's got a few rules of her own to follow, but I'm sure she'll tell you all about those herself."

Charlie slid off his chair and rose to his intimidating height.

"So I think that covers it. Any questions?"

I had a million random questions floating in my head, but I figured I should save them for another day.

"No, sir."

"Good. Just follow my rules and we'll be cool."

"I intend to, sir."

Emmett opened the door as Charlie approached.

"Oh, one more thing. Bella's grounded for the next month for lying, which means no visitation. So let that be a warning to you—I don't tolerate dishonesty. I guess you will have to send her email or whatever it is you kids do nowadays."

I'm sure the disappointment was noticeable on my face. One month would seem like an eternity without a chance to see my Bella.

Just as Charlie was walking through the door, a realization hit me.

"Actually, Chief Swan, I do have one question?"

He stopped and looked at me. "What?"

"Um, tomorrow is Bella's birthday and I was wondering, um, if I could have your permission to call her tomorrow evening."

"Sure, I don't see any problem with that. Just no phone calls after 9:00."

"Thanks Chief Swan. I won't let you down."

"I'll hold you to that," he responded as he walked out the door.

Emmett followed behind him, giving me the thumbs-up sign.

I exhaled loudly, feeling utterly drained from that confrontation. Maybe everything would work out after all?

**Thank you for reading! **

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	13. Chapter 13 the real thing!

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**Special thanks to my superstar beta, Jensy. She is a miracle worker. Thank you for making my chapters worth reading!**

**Disclaimer: Twilight and its characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. I just put them behind bars.  
**

**BPOV**

Birthdays have never been a big deal to me. Most kids have large, festive celebrations yearly, but not me. I would usually be satisfied by a sleepover at my Mom's house with a couple of my closest friends. But that had been years ago; I hadn't hosted an actual birthday party since I had turned thirteen.

Today would be no different. I had already received a package from my mom, delivered yesterday and waiting downstairs for me to open it. I'm sure Charlie would provide me with something practical like pepper spray or a gas card for my truck.

I enjoyed getting gifts, but I had never been a material kind of girl, so a casual dinner with my family would more than suit my birthday desires. Well, until this year, that is. What I really wanted was to go on an actual date with my boyfriend . . . only a little more than three years to go until that would happen. Sardonically I realized that I would be able to drink alcohol before I would have a real date with my boyfriend. I loved my life.

I hadn't spoken to Charlie at all yesterday. He was gone before I got up for school, and I was already in bed by the time I heard his cruiser pull in the driveway. Wanting to avoid listening to him remind me of his disapproval towards Edward, I stayed snuggled under the covers and pretended to be asleep.

Frankly I was still recuperating from my first-ever shouting match with my dad, which left me with lingering mixed feelings. Even though it had been awful, I felt a surprising sense of optimism that we would be able to work out some sort of an agreement when it came to visiting Edward. Baring my soul like I did seemed to make him more receptive to the idea of letting me continue my relationship with Edward. And Charlie being so honest with me, talking to me like I was an adult who could handle the truth, had really meant a lot to me.

A part of me was still skeptical, however. I had to prove myself over the next month and I had a feeling that my dad would be watching me extra carefully. If I screwed up, no more Edward. Charlie held the key to my happiness and he knew it.

I started my typical morning routine of showering and getting dressed. I stumbled down the stairs and was surprised to find my dad waiting for me in the kitchen. I had been so preoccupied by my thoughts of Edward that I didn't notice the smell of eggs and bacon sizzling on the stove. Charlie had cooked me breakfast. I was honestly surprised and grateful.

We didn't speak much at the table. The minimal conversation was normal for us, and the sense of normalcy steadied me. So far the day was drama free. Charlie inhaled breakfast while I used my fork to push around my eggs on the plate, finally taking the risk to try a few bites. Though the eggs were a little runny, this was the best birthday gift my dad had ever given me.

When we were finished Charlie handed me a small wrapped box and I squealed in delight after tearing through the paper, finding myself staring at a new cell-phone. It was a really sophisticated smart-phone with a keyboard for texting and I immediately shot out of my chair to envelop him in a huge hug.

"Oh my gosh, Dad! I can't believe you got me a cell phone. This is so awesome!"

My effusive reaction to his gift made Charlie appear uncomfortable but happy.

"Well, it seems all the kids have cell phones nowadays, and I don't like the idea of you driving far from home without some way to contact me."

_Wait a minute. Did he just say what I think he said?_

"Dad, are you saying I can still visit Edward?"

He cleared his throat and swirled his coffee cup around.

"Yeah, Bella. I guess that's what I'm saying. You can still visit."

Scratch my previous statement. THIS was the best gift Charlie had ever given me, hands down.

I squealed even louder than before and practically jumped on Charlie. I hugged him as tightly as I could, and I could feel the tears start to pool in my eyes.

"Thank you so much Daddy. I love you."

Charlie started coughing and began pushing his way out of my embrace.

"I've got the picture, Bella. You can let go now. I can't breathe."

I laughed and released him from my suffocating embrace, returning to my own chair.

"There will be rules, Bella. And if you can't follow them, I won't allow you to visit with that boy."

"Of course, Dad. Don't you worry. I will walk the line."

"Well, you better. I won't be giving second chances."

He explained I had to keep my grades up and not get into any trouble at school. No skipping classes or being tardy. I was to let Charlie know where I was at all times, and if he found out I had been somewhere I shouldn't have been, I would be grounded indefinitely.

"So can I go see Edward on tomorrow, Dad? He has visiting hours then."

"We went over this the other night, Bella. You are grounded for a month. You purposely deceived me and that is unacceptable. You will survive a month without Edward—it's not like he's going anywhere."

I nodded. I had hoped he would change his mind about grounding me, but he was a stickler for the rules. _Damn it._

"Well, kiddo, you better get your stuff or you'll be late for school. Remember, no tardies."

I ran upstairs to grab my backpack when I noticed a small flower pot filled with little light-blue and yellow flowers lying on my bed. A marker in the pot's soil listed them as "forget-me-nots". They were lovely. Beside the flowers was a piece of rolled paper with a pale yellow ribbon tied around it. I glanced up and noticed that my bedroom window was open, even though I was quite sure it had been closed as I made my way downstairs earlier.

I walked to the window and looked out, but didn't notice anyone outside.

Making my way back to the offering on my bed, I untied the soft ribbon and unrolled the note. I broke out into an enormous grin when I saw Edward's elegant handwriting on the page.

_A friend who is far away is sometimes much nearer than one who is at hand. _

_And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation_.

_~Kahlil Gibran_

_Bella,_

_Thank you for offering the gift of your love to the awkward boy in your biology class. I am eternally grateful for your presence in my life. You will live in my thoughts for all of my days. Happy Birthday, my Love._

_Always,_

_Edward_

I threw myself on the bed, hugging the note and skimming my fingers over the feathery, soft petals. Edward was amazing! Only he would be able to organize a birthday surprise from juvie. I giggled, knowing that he probably had put Jasper up to this. I had never received flowers from a boy before and now I could _officially_ claim today as the best birthday ever.

My dad's voice brought me out of my love-induced haze.

"Bells, you alright up there? What's taking you so long?"

"Sorry Dad, I'm just checking out my new phone."

"You need to get a move on, or you'll be late for school."

I looked at my watch and groaned. Charlie was right. I was running behind schedule and I couldn't risk being late, thereby extending my time away from Edward.

I placed my gift on my desk and hoped Charlie wouldn't notice.

I heard the doorbell ring as I was making my way down the stairs and was shocked to see my dad and Jasper Hale in some sort of staring contest at the front door.

My dad looked over at me and then back at Jasper. He didn't even try to disguise his scowl.

"Hale, what are you doing here?"

"Hello Chief Swan. I'm here to escort Miss Swan to and from school today, for her birthday."

I noticed for the first time that Jasper was wearing a white dress shirt and black tie with his jeans.

"Thanks Jasper. That's awfully sweet of you. We better get going."

I glanced over to Charlie, who appeared a bit dumbstruck, and kissed his cheek.

"See ya after school, Dad."

Jasper and I headed to his parents' luxurious Lincoln Towncar. He scurried to the passenger side and opened the door for me, before crossing over to the driver side. We both buckled in, knowing my dad might be watching from the house.

"So Jasper, you didn't have anything to do with a certain floral delivery this morning?"

I could see the blush creep up his cheeks.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Miss Swan. I am merely here to make sure you arrive to school safely."

"Yeah, right. Well I'm impressed you managed to make it up that tree without harming yourself."

He shrugged. "I know, right? I was supposed to put the flowers in your locker, but I thought it would be much cooler for you to find them in your room. Were you surprised?"

"Completely. I can't believe Edward put you up to this."

"I was happy to help. He would do the same for Alice if the roles were reversed."

My jaw unhinged. "Alice? What do you mean?"

Jasper's face turned a thousand shades of red. "Um, I misspoke. I meant he would do the same things for me if the roles were reversed."

The ride to Forks high was awkwardly silent. A million scenarios were running through my mind. I was so excited that Edward had given me a birthday surprise, but I just couldn't stop thinking of Jasper's slip. He was totally into Alice. Edward had hinted that Jasper had a thing for her, but I hadn't read much into it then.

Jasper was such a great friend to Edward and me. The least I could do was to throw him a bone.

We arrived to school with only a few minutes to spare, and Jasper quickly made his way to my door. He reached his hand in to help me out of the car and I gave him a kiss on the cheek once I was out.

"Thank you Jasper. I'm willing to bet that if you ask Alice to the homecoming dance next week, she will say yes. Don't blow this perfect opportunity."

He looked at me dumbfounded and I winked before bolting to my first class.

Jasper drove me back home from school and I gave him a hard time when he admitted he still hadn't asked Alice to homecoming.

"Jazz! I'm telling you she is a sure thing. If you don't ask her, someone else will."

"I know, I know." His eyes were huge and he looked like he was about to pee in his pants. "M-M-Maybe I'll drive to her house after I drop you off."

I jumped out before he had a chance to open my door. "Go ask her. You look handsome in your tie and she won't be able to resist your charms."

I patted him on the shoulder and made my way to my front door.

Charlie and I had a nice dinner at the Forks Diner and I was busy working on my homework when the phone rang. I had already spoken to everyone who would typically call for my birthday, so I assumed it would be for Charlie.

I was quite surprised when Charlie yelled up the stairs for me to pick up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Happy birthday, Bella!"

"Edward? Oh my gosh!"

"Were you expecting someone else? Your other boyfriend, perhaps?" He chuckled.

"No, I'm, um, just surprised. Thank you so much for the flowers, Edward. They were beautiful."

"They aren't half as beautiful as you, my Love. I'm so glad you like them. I thought about roses, but they wouldn't last very long, and with the right amount of water and sunlight, the forget-me-nots will stay with you much longer."

We continued to talk about school and then it occurred to me that my dad had answered the phone. Had he realized who was calling?

"Edward, did my dad recognize your voice when he answered?"

"Of course he did, Bella. He was expecting my call. I asked him for permission yesterday."

"Yesterday?" I was totally confused.

"He didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

Edward laughed. "Your dad paid me a visit yesterday."

"Oh no. He didn't threaten you or anything, did he?"

"No, nothing like that. He just came to Meyer to lay down some ground rules for my relationship with you. He was quite fair, actually."

"Yeah, except for the fact I won't see you again until October."

"I know. It's going to suck to not see you for a month, but he could have forbidden us from _ever_ seeing one another. Imagine how terrible that would have been. We just need to bide our time and obey Charlie's rules. If we do that, he will let you visit whenever you can. And I will try to call you as much as possible. He didn't seem too opposed to my request to call you tonight."

Edward was right. My dad was being far cooler about everything than I would have ever expected. But a month was such a long time—I hoped I would survive. I just wanted to kiss my boyfriend on my birthday. Hell, holding his hand would be enough.

Edward and I spoke a few more minutes before he was forced to end his call. Phones were a hot commodity in prison and he was only allowed fifteen minutes to talk.

"Happy birthday, Bella. I'll try to call you again tomorrow. I love you."

"I love you too, Edward. Goodnight."

I slept peacefully that night, dreaming of myself and Edward kissing on a bed of blue wildflowers.

***

One month . . . Thirty days . . . It might have seemed like a short amount of time, but it was hell to be kept away from Edward for so long. Every morning I marked another day off my "Countdown to Edward" calendar.

While life crept by at a turtle's pace for me, it seemed to speed along for my friends.

Jasper took my advice and finally asked Alice to the homecoming dance. She didn't make it easy for him and told him "I need to think about it," before sprinting into the house to put Rose and me on three-way calling. I was sure my ears had been permanently damaged from her loud screams of excitement. She made him suffer for a full twenty-four hours before calling to accept his invitation.

Almost four weeks had passed since the dance, and Alice and Jasper were now attached at the hip. They were so sweet that it was almost nauseating, and I could tell it was killing Rose to see her brother with her best friend. And though she claimed she was waiting to find a "mature" boyfriend in college, it was obvious that she was envious that her two best friends were in serious relationships.

Being grounded meant I was on home-arrest after school and on the weekends. I spent a lot of time getting ahead in my classes and emailing Edward. He had gone so far as to create our own private online chatroom and we would try to instant message as much as we could, since it was such a pain for him to get access to the phones.

I also used my month-long sentence to complete all of my college applications. Edward didn't want me to limit my academic future simply because he was trapped in Washington, and he insisted that I apply anywhere I wanted to go. Truthfully, it really didn't matter to me where I went for school since I had no clue about what I wanted to do with my life. I did know that my parents didn't have a lot of money, so I decided to stay in-state for the tuition savings.

I applied to three schools: Central Washington University, Washington State University, and University of Washington. Alice, Rose, and Jasper were hoping to attend UW, so I was leaning towards there as well. It also helped that Seattle was only a half hour from Edward.

Edward kept busy with schoolwork. Luckily his midterms fell during our time apart, so he had plenty of time to devote to studying. Charlie seemed very impressed by Edward's mid-semester grades (all A's). I hoped my dad would be willing to end my punishment early, but when I suggested it, he threatened to extend it another month.

It was apparent from every email and phone call that Edward was lonely. His attempts to stay out of trouble had effectively caused him to isolate himself from his fellow inmates, and the forced seclusion was starting to show. I worried about him, feeling the palpable pain of our separation and knowing it must have been even worse for him, locked up as a criminal.

Jasper had obtained approval to visit Edward, and ended up road-tripping to Meyer in early October. Of course he delivered a care package from me that seemed to lift Edward's spirits. Edward said Jasper spent the whole time describing how Alice was the perfect woman. I was glad to be far away from that conversation.

The day I had waited so long for had finally arrived and I was on my way to visit Edward again. My dad insisted on driving me in his cruiser, stating that he had some official business at the detention center anyway (which I doubted). I groaned, but knew that my enforced chauffeur-chaperone was not negotiable.

The ride was quiet, but internally I was bursting with excitement. I was out of the car before Charlie could kill the engine and practically ran to the visitor entrance. I paced the visitation room, trying to calm myself, when I finally saw Edward being led in. Not thinking, I ran across the room intending on throwing myself into Edward's arms. It wasn't one of my most graceful moments and I gasped, feeling myself start to fall as my feet came out from under me. Luckily, Edward leapt forward and caught me before I hit the floor with a thud. He picked me up and I nudged my face into the crook of his neck, tightly wrapping my legs around his waist.

God how I had missed him. His smell, his taste; the feel of his skin. I swore then and there that I would never do anything that would keep us apart for this long again. I stole a few kisses on his neck and captured his lips with mine before I felt the guard yank us apart.

"Masen. If you can't control your girlfriend, I will be required to take you back to the cell block and have her escorted off the premises."

Mortified, I put my feet back on the ground and made my way to our table. We scooted our chairs close together and held hands on the tabletop.

"I missed you so much Edward. Staying away from you was the worst punishment I've ever had to endure."

"Same here, Bella. I was so miserable I actually considered busting out of here just long enough to visit you in Forks and be back in my cell before count."

I laughed, feeling thankful he hadn't actually attempted to break out.

As usual our hour together was entirely too short, and I kissed him goodbye, dreamily making my way back to the lobby. My dad was waiting for me, looking a little disgusted, and I prayed he hadn't witnessed my momentary loss of sanity when I had practically jumped Edward. In my excitement, I had forgotten Charlie was there.

"Ready to go, Dad?"

"In a minute, Bells. I need to speak to Masen first."

Oh crap. He totally saw Edward slip me a little tongue as we said goodbye.

"You aren't going to hurt him, are you Dad?"

"Geez Bella, I'm not some evil tyrant. I just need to speak with him for a second. Calm down."

Charlie walked in and I watched him through the window as he shook Edward's hand. The two of them seemed to engage in a comfortable conversation and I was shocked to see them both smile and even laugh for a moment.

"What the hell?" I whispered.

Edward had never spoken of my father, other than that phone call on my birthday, but it looked like the two of them had been communicating without my knowledge. I didn't know whether to be happy or disturbed by it all.

Charlie patted Edward on the back and made his way back to the lobby.

"Gee Dad, if I didn't know any better, I would say you and my boyfriend are pals."

"I wouldn't say that, Bells. We just have an understanding. And I'm taking him fishing on Saturday."

**Bet you guys never saw that one coming, huh? Well, I'm already quite a few words into the next chapter and it will include the Jailward/Charlie fishing adventure! Charlie's a good guy and maybe he can be the father Edward never had....**

**Thanks so much for reading and if you feel so inclined, I would love a review.**

*****Special note*****

**Sept 11 at 11:59 pm, the SupportStacie authors auction will begin. All money raised will help a young mother with breast and ovarian cancer pay her medical bills. There was an auction in April and it raised a ton of money. I had a great time bidding and went in with some girls to buy an outtake from tby789's "The Office". It was worth every penny.**

**I've decided to offer myself up for bid this time. I know I'm not one Twilight's fanfic superstars. But I encourage anyone who is interested to bid! I'll write whatever the winner wants. It could be a Visitation outtake or something completely new. I'm open to anything. I'm sure there is someone out there who would love Bella and Jailward to have a real conjugal visit...complete with sexytimes! **

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**Thanks again for all your support!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello everyone! Thank you for all the kind reviews. I adore all of you for taking the time to read and review.**

**I would like to give a very special shout out to two wonderful ladies. ** ** LaTuaCantante4him and ILRPinkGirl were extremely generous and bid $180 for two Visitation outtakes in the Support Stacie auction. Let's give these ladies a round of applause. I am proud to be associated with such lovely people. The outtakes will be posted in the next couple of weeks and will be lemony. Be on the lookout.**

**Special thanks to my lovely beta, Jensy. This wonderful woman had major surgery and still found the time to edit my chapter. I love her.**

**This chapter is dedicated to my dad, Charlie. (really) He took the time to share his love of fishing with me and helped inspire some of the events in this chapter. :)**

**Enjoy!**

**-----------------------------------------------**

Chief Swan's truck meandered down the winding country road, jostling me around as I occupied the front seat. I was crammed in the center, my legs straddling the gear shift. Saying that I was uncomfortable would be an understatement. Having my body pinned between Charlie and an unknown man was not my idea of fun. Also, having Chief Swan's hand so close to my crotch put the fear of God in my heart. Maybe this was all a plot to neuter me so I couldn't impregnate his daughter.

We were on our way to some fishing spot that the Chief was dying to try out. He was pulling a flat-bottomed Jon-boat on the trailer behind us, and I prayed the little aluminum boat was big enough to accommodate three people. I had never been fishing before; the only watercraft I had ever boarded being the huge ferry my mom and I took over to Victoria when I was a kid.

When I was convicted almost four months ago, I never in a million years would have guessed that I would be allowed a fishing expedition with Bella Swan's dad. My mind drifted back, thinking of his previous visits . . .

True to the Chief's word, he began visiting me at Meyer, starting one week after he had laid down the law to Bella and me.

His first visit was on a Wednesday, and any annoyance I may have harbored regarding his enforced quality time together was immediately forgotten once I noticed the McDonald's bag sitting on the table. The smell of French fries filled the room and I began drooling like one of Pavlov's dogs.

"Sit down, kid. I brought you some lunch. I figure all teenage boys like cheeseburgers and French fries."

I sat down and began stuffing my face with the greasy yet heavenly fare. I rarely had any pocket money to spend while living in the foster care system, providing few opportunities to veer outside school cafeteria lunches and whatever unsavory meals given to me. Prison food had been even worse, amazingly. I couldn't remember enjoying a meal more.

I nearly reached over to hug Chief Swan when he pointed to the chocolate milkshake and soda sweating on the plastic table.

"Thank you so much," I mumbled with my mouth full of food.

Charlie chuckled, shaking his head. "You're too skinny. A gust of wind could blow you over. You need to eat more."

I looked up, surprised to see a concerned expression on his face. "Have you ever eaten prison food?"

He shook his head.

"Well, be thankful for that. It's awful—inedible. It's a miracle no one has starved to death in here."

We sat in silence as I finished my meal, the sound of the last bit of coke slurping through the straw signaling Charlie to begin speaking. "So, let's go take a walk outside and you can tell me about yourself."

The food suddenly felt like a rock in my stomach as I got up and pushed in my chair, gathering my trash.

"What's there to say? I'm sure you've read my file. Invisible, orphaned, foster kid turned murderer. That's me."

"Just humor me then, Masen. I want to know more about the boy my daughter is so crazy about. Give Bella some credit; there must be _something_ special about you."

We walked around the prison yard, where surprisingly I found myself telling Charlie about my parents. It was exhausting and difficult for me to talk about it, and it was one of the first times I had allowed myself to share the details of the physical and emotional abuse doled out by my father. I believed that I really needed to be honest with Charlie. He promised that anything we discussed in our "bonding" sessions was strictly confidential, which he would never tell anyone, especially Bella.

I was thankful when Charlie reversed the roles after a while to start telling me about himself.

It saddened me to learn that he didn't have an idealistic childhood either. An only child, Charlie had lost his mom to cancer while he was in his teens. His dad had been an alcoholic who later died while Charlie studied to become a police officer.

"I pretty much raised myself once my mom died, since Dad was either at work or at the bar. He just kind of let me do whatever. That's when I met Bella's mom."

Charlie met Renee the summer before his senior year of high school.

"I was painting houses that summer and she was in Port Angeles visiting her grandmother. She would come outside everyday to keep me company as I painted her grandma's house. It was a huge house and it took me almost a week to finish. On the last day I asked her out. She was beautiful. Still is."

A sad smile overtook Charlie's face.

"We had an amazing summer. We spent every second together and when she left to go back to her parents' house in Phoenix at the end of the summer, I was devastated. This was before cell phones and the internet. We were only able to call each other every once in a while and had to rely on sending letters. It was tough, but worth it. I was in love and would have done anything to be with her."

"I can sympathize completely, sir." I chuckled.

He hesitated for a second, taking that in. "Yeah, I guess so. Well, somehow Renee managed to convince her parents to spend Christmas in Washington with her grandmother, and we had a wonderful few days together that December. We started talking about marriage and going off to college together. We were convinced that everything would fall into place after graduation.

"Imagine my surprise when Renee called me on Valentine's day telling me she was pregnant. Needless to say, her parents didn't react well to the news—they essentially threw her out.

"She came to live with me and my dad in Forks where we quickly married and finished high school. We had planned on going to college, but between her parents no longer financially supporting her and my dad's small income, we knew there was no way we could do it."

He sighed. I had the sense that those were the most words Charlie had strung together in quite a while. After a beat he continued, "I started working as a security guard down at one of the lumberyards during the night and took Criminal Justice classes at the community college during the day.

"Renee's pregnancy was really hard on her, so she stayed home and rested. When Bella was born that September, it was the greatest day of my life. She was so tiny; so beautiful. I was amazed that I could help create something so perfect."

I agreed. Bella's birth was indeed a wonderful event; she was as perfect as a woman could be.

"It was hard, Edward. We were two kids without a clue about how to be husband and wife to each other. And we sure as hell didn't know anything about raising a baby. My dad got sick and died suddenly. He didn't have any life insurance so I had to start picking up extra shifts to make the mortgage on the house he left behind. I was so busy that I didn't have time to spend with Renee or Bella."

His voice lowered. "I left them home alone long enough to realize that they really didn't need me. Renee's parents had a change of heart, so Renee took Bella to Phoenix for a visit. She filed for divorce a week later." Charlie coughed a few times, as if attempting to hide the hurt in his voice. "I felt like a complete failure. I loved Renee completely and couldn't understand how that wasn't enough."

I found myself feeling badly for Charlie. I would die if Bella were to leave me.

"Did you ever consider moving to Phoenix to be closer to Bella?"

"I did, but when Renee started dating only a few short months after leaving me, I just couldn't bear the thought of seeing her with someone else. It's a real kick to the gut when you realize you love someone who would probably never love you back. I was the boy from the other side of the tracks that her parents had warned her about. It was probably exciting for her to be with me at first, but once reality set in, she realized she didn't want me or Forks."

With a start, I grasped the parallels between Charlie and me.

He continued, "I was broken and selfish, unfortunately letting my feelings regarding Renee keep me away from Bella. I'll always regret not being more involved in her childhood."

"Did you ever get remarried?"

I knew I was being nosy, but it was interesting learning more about Chief Swan. Additionally, I wanted to keep the spotlight off of me—I didn't want to share anything else about my own past.

"No. I wasted a lot of years pining over Renee and what could have been. It wasn't until she remarried a couple of years ago that I finally decided it was time to move on with my life. Of course now I only have time for one woman in my life and that's Bella. I wouldn't even know where to begin when it comes to dating." He snorted.

"Come on, Chief Swan—I bet you could be quite the ladies' man if you got out there more."

"Like I need dating advice from you, Masen. You worry about staying out of trouble, and I'll worry about my love life."

He patted me on the back almost like a father would a son. Deeply honored that the Chief felt comfortable enough to share a part of himself with me, I walked in step with Bella's father, considering how incredibly far this first showdown had exceeded my expectations.

The Chief continued his visits every week or so, and I actually began to look forward to them. Not only was he my link to Bella, but it was also invigorating to spend an hour outside, away from the other inmates.

When he had first mentioned the idea of going fishing together, I thought he was kidding, but he indeed had been serious. Chief Swan had frequently spoken of his love of the outdoors and of fishing. It was his favorite hobby and any moment of free time was spent out on the sound.

He had cut back on his fishing time since Bella's attack. He didn't like leaving her alone, even for short periods of time, but he had some time off the following week and figured he could get his fix while she was at school. I wondered for a moment if he had forgotten my current predicament. I was in juvie. How the hell was I going to go fishing? There certainly wasn't any lake or stream situated on Meyer's campus.

But leave it to Mr. Law Enforcement to know how to work the system. Charlie knew that the Director of Meyer truly believed in rehabilitation rather than just punishment. The Director had established a mentoring program several years ago in which inmates were "adopted" by an adult on the outside, enlisting plenty of local businessmen, politicians, and others to participate as mentors. I had never heard of the opportunity because I was considered a violent offender, but Charlie had been able to pull some strings to get me into the program.

One of the perks for me was that I would be allowed to leave Meyer up to ten times per year with my mentor. We were encouraged to do something that would build character and allow the inmates an opportunity to have a healthy male relationship. It made sense, really. If there was one thing I shared with most of my fellow inmates, it was that almost all of us had either had caustic or nonexistent relationships with our fathers.

I had never been fishing before. Having grown up in the city, my father wasn't into nature, and of course there just wasn't any opportunity once I was in the foster care system. I was a little horrified that I would embarrass myself in front of Bella's father. I knew I needed to demonstrate that I was worthy of his daughter and I feared my novice efforts at attempting to catch a fish would prove the opposite.

The chief was shocked and appalled that I had never experienced the excitement of reeling in the big one. He looked forward to showing me the ropes.

I was allowed civilian clothes for my outside excursions. Unfortunately, the only clothes I owned were sitting in some evidence bag at the police station. I'm sure my foster mother had long since donated anything left at her home. Emmett took great joy in mocking the wardrobe he was able to procure from belongings left behind by former inmates.

"Those stone-washed jeans are hot, Masen. And that flannel shirt looks like it came straight from a Pearl Jam video."

I looked like a reject from the nineties. It was quite embarrassing.

"Watch out Masen. Someone might call the fashion police on you!"

Emmett fancied himself a comedian. I wanted to punch him.

"It's not like your C.O. uniform is impressing Stacey and Clinton from _What Not To Wear, _Emmett. Besides, anything is better than that awful prison jumpsuit. And don't they always say that old-fashioned trends cycle back around? I'm just ahead of the game."

"Good one, Edward. You are learning well, young Jedi."

Emmett gave me a man slap on the ass and sent me out into the visitor lobby to an awaiting Chief Swan.

It was an odd feeling being escorted out into the parking lot. I had been trapped within Meyer's razor-wire fencing for four months. I felt a huge weight lift off my chest as Charlie led me to his truck.

I was surprised when I saw the passenger door swing open. For a moment I honestly thought he brought Bella. I could feel the excitement bubbling inside me. Was I really that lucky?

As I saw the figure exit the vehicle, I realized I was delusional for even thinking Charlie would allow me the chance to see Bella outside of the detention center. Instead, I was face-to-face with a middle-aged man with platinum blonde hair and kind eyes. He was well dressed for a fishing trip, in khakis and an expensive sweater.

"Hi Edward. My name is Carlisle Cullen. I've heard a lot about you."

He placed his hand out and I shook it. I had heard his name before.

"You're Emmett's dad."

"Indeed I am. And don't forget Alice."

"So, are you like Chief Swan's fishing buddy or something?"

Carlisle chuckled at my question.

"Charlie's gotten me out a few times, but actually I came along this time so I could meet you. It seems my son has really taken a liking to you, Mr. Masen. And after talking with Charlie here, I'm hoping I can be of some assistance."

I couldn't think of anything that this stranger could help me with, but I remembered from Emmett's life story that Carlisle was a kind and compassionate man. It couldn't hurt to have another person on my side.

The ride to the lake took about an hour and by the time we got there, it felt like we had long since exited civilization. The Chief backed the truck down an old gravel ramp and within minutes the boat was in the water. There was a small dock, and he had me hold the boat to keep it from floating away as he went to park the truck.

Charlie and Carlisle got in the boat first, with Charlie grasping the dock and instructing me to hop in. As I stepped into the boat, I nearly fell over when my weight caused the small vessel to sink, wobble, and rock.

I may have emitted a rather un-masculine shriek and was mortified to see both Charlie and Carlisle laughing at me. I figured it could have been worse. At least I didn't fall in the water, right?

Charlie cranked up the outboard motor and we were off, looking for what he called a hot spot. We motored around for a while until Charlie found a place where several trees had fallen over into the water, explaining that fish often resided in such areas. I had no idea, so I took his word for it.

Chief Swan was very patient with me. He taught me about hooks and lures and bobbers and other things I couldn't remember afterwards. Dangling a wiggling worm from his calloused fingers, he showed me the proper way to bait the hook. The slimy feel of the worm in my fingers was rather gross, and Charlie seemed to get a kick out of my facial expressions as I pierced the worm's squirming body with my hook.

Next was the art of casting. Charlie was able to cast his line out like a professional; I was amazed by how far he could send his hook flying through the air. It was apparent he had spent many a day out on the lake.

My casting was embarrassing and dangerous. I wanted to drown myself in the river when I heard Carlisle yelp in pain when I nicked his arm with my hook. He insisted he wasn't bothered and assured me it was merely a flesh wound. I, however, felt defeated.

After that incident, I was very cautious with my fishing pole. Caution didn't always mean success and more than once Charlie had to cut my line because my hook was caught in a nearby tree. It was official. I was the world's worst fisherman.

Charlie didn't seem to mind and never raised his voice or seemed disappointed in me. Of course, he was having a good time, considering he and Carlisle were having no problem catching their dinners.

I had a nibble or two on my line, but hadn't caught one fish.

After a while we decided to take a break for lunch. Charlie maneuvered the boat over to a clearing on one side of the lakeshore, where we staked out a spot to have a picnic on the grass. Carlisle had provided lunch and I inhaled his wife's chicken salad sandwiches.

"So Edward, Charlie here tells me your dream is to go to medical school."

"Yeah, I've always wanted to be a doctor. I think maybe a pediatrician? I'm not sure."

In my meetings with Chief Swan, I had explained to him how ever since my mom had purchased me a doctor kit as a little boy, I had always wanted to be a physician. I figured that dream was shattered, because I was sure no medical school would ever admit someone convicted of manslaughter.

"I'm not sure if my son told you, but I am a doctor. I split my time in the Emergency Room at two different hospitals in the Forks and Port Angeles area."

"Yeah, Emmett mentioned that. He said he was your patient and then you adopted him."

"Yes. I knew Emmett was special the first moment I met him. I just sensed he had the potential to really be something if just given an opportunity. I think Charlie and Emmett both see that same potential in you, Edward."

Feeling shocked by that comment, I looked over at Charlie questioningly and he smiled and nodded.

"I have a connection at the hospital in Edmonds. If medicine is really something you are passionate about, I have a friend who would be willing to have you shadow him one day a week. This would give you the opportunity to see if medicine is really a career that interests you."

I was blown away. Chief Swan thought I had potential? He had actually called Carlisle to put this in motion? I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop; the bite instead of the kiss. This offer seemed too good to be true. They were willing to let me outside the prison doors one day a week?

"So Meyer will actually let me do this?"

"Yes Edward, they will. In addition to the mentoring program, they do permit inmates to participate in community service projects. Charlie and I spoke with the director yesterday and explained that this was not only a chance for you to work towards a career goal, but the hospital was also in desperate need of volunteers. He agreed. If you keep your record clean and maintain your grades, you can start in January. So, what do you say?"

"Um, yes, I would love to. That sounds great."

We chatted a little more—Carlisle shared some his funny ER stories—and then we climbed back into the boat. Charlie said we had about forty-five minutes left to fish before we had to head back to Meyer.

The fishing was much more slow-going going this time. I had improved my technique a bit, but still hadn't landed a fish. Charlie and Carlisle didn't have much luck either.

I reeled in my line and saw that my hook had been wiped clean. I dug around in the worm container for my next victim.

"Last one, Masen. We need to be heading back in a few."

"No problem, Chief."

I cast out my line, impressed that I didn't hook any people, birds, or trees in the process. Charlie had already begun putting his pole away and was getting all of our gear together for departure.

I noticed my little red and white bobber bounce around on the water a bit, but I didn't get too excited. I hadn't caught a fish all day and didn't expect my luck to change.

I was just about to give up and reel my line in when my bobber suddenly disappeared under the water, the front of my fishing pole bending downward.

"Edward, you've got a bite! Pull back to hook him!"

I could feel the excitement in Charlie's voice.

I pulled my pole back over my shoulders quickly, felling the resistance coming from the line. Holy shit. I finally hooked my first fish.

I eagerly reeled in my line, and it proved to be more difficult than I had originally thought. This fish must be as big as the boat.

Charlie and Carlisle stood by me, shouting their encouragement. It was a great feeling. This must be what it was like when parents cheered on their kids playing sports; when parents showed a modicum of interest in their children. It was a foreign experience.

After what seemed like an eternity, I finally saw my catch break the surface of the water. I laughed when I realized that what I thought was a prize winning catch, was in actuality a little four-inch greenish-brown fish. It was tiny, yet Charlie's enthusiasm made it out to be the catch of the century.

Carlisle insisted on taking my picture and I stood there holding my little fish, while Charlie stood beside me with his arm around my shoulders as the camera flashed.

All too quickly I was back at Meyer in my prison issued jumpsuit, sitting in my tiny cinderblock cell. But instead of feeling utter despair, I sensed a warm sensation in my chest. For the first time since my mother had died, I actually felt like I had a family. And whether he knew it or not, Charlie Swan was already more of a father to me than the one who had created me.

**I hope you enjoyed this little bit of Edward/Charlie fluff. I had a great time writing it! **

**Please take the time to leave me a review. **

**If you haven't read The Cannabean Betrothal or A Rough Start by ItzMegan73, then you are totally missing out on some good fic. She's under my author favorites. Check her out. xoxo  
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	15. Chapter 15

**Holy cow! Don't pass out, it's really an update. **

**Sorry for the delay, but it's time for some new Jailward!**

**Special thanks to Angstgoddess003, GinnyW31, and the Fictionators for pimping my little story.  
**

**Special thanks to my lovely beta, Jensy/pbswimmer. She kicks ass.**

**Be sure to check out the A/N.**

**Disclaimer: Meyer owns it all. **

BPOV

It was a cold December afternoon, and Alice had dropped me off at the police station to wait for Charlie. My truck was in the shop for exhaust problems and since tonight was our weekly Fork's Diner date night, it just made sense to get dropped off here rather than at home.

The officer at the front desk smiled, informing me that my dad was conducting an interrogation but would return in a few minutes. I issued my thanks and made my way to Charlie's office.

I hadn't been here since the famed "Edward is bad" altercation a few months ago; therefore I entered with trepidation. I nosily eyed the various certificates and plaques covering the wood-paneled walls. There were a few photos of Dad and Billy, as well as several pictures of me throughout the years. I cringed at the sight of my awkward preteen self with braces and a bad perm. I was so going to ask Charlie to throw away that horrid photo.

I sighed wistfully as I caught a glimpse of an old photo of my parents, hidden behind several piles of paper on a dusty filing cabinet. They seemed so young. Charlie was clean shaven, and I was stunned by how handsome he looked. I had always wondered if my dad had ever gotten over my mom, and seeing this photo of Charlie and Renee during happier times brought about a feeling of deep sadness. Maybe I could convince him to sign up for one of those online dating sites.

My extreme boredom made me more aware of my stomach began growling furiously. I had no idea how long Charlie's meeting would last, so I threw myself into his chair and starting pilfering through his desk, knowing there must be a granola bar or some other sustenance in one of the drawers. I paused as something caught my eye. There on Charlie's desk was a framed photo of my dad and Edward.

"What the hell?"

I picked up the picture and examined it carefully. Edward was standing next to my dad, holding the most pitiful excuse for a fish I had ever seen. I had a goldfish back in Phoenix that was bigger than that little thing. But the expression on Edward's face was one of accomplishment and pure happiness. I hadn't often seen him engaging in such a carefree smile, and seeing him so happy made me fall in love with him all over again.

What surprised me most was my dad's appearance in the photo. He had his arm around Edward's shoulders and his face was turned towards him with an expression that could only be described as pride. I couldn't recall a single time my dad had ever looked at me that way. It could only mean one thing: my dad was dating my boyfriend.

I was startled by the sound of my dad entering his office, and I quickly replaced the framed photo on top of the desk.

"Hi Bells. How was your day?"

"Um, it was fine. Same crap, different day."

"Yeah. Sorry to keep you waiting. Mr. Newton was found walking naked through town again. Had to wait for his son to pick him up."

I chuckled. Mike Newton's grandfather was suffering from Alzheimer's and was notorious for wandering off sans clothing. It wasn't really funny, but it embarrassed the hell out of Mike and frankly made me laugh. I hoped that disease didn't run in my family. I shuddered at the thought of Charlie walking naked through Forks proper.

I picked up the photo of Edward and my dad and waved it in the air.

"So Dad, when were you going to come out and tell me about your obvious bromance with my boyfriend?"

Charlie blushed and then shook his head, squinting. "What's a bromance? That's just a pic from that fishing trip I took Edward on a month ago. It was his first fish. A man should always have a record of his first catch."

"Yeah, right. Well, why is it that my dad has a picture of my boyfriend, when all I have is a crappy yearbook photo? Did you ever think to make me a copy?"

"Oh. Huh. Well, I guess I never thought about it. You can have that one if you like – I can make another copy."

Not willing to live another moment without owning a copy of Edward's smile, I grabbed the frame a dropped it into my backpack.

"Come on, Chief. Let's go eat."

Later that evening I found myself on the phone with Edward, while trying my best to avoid writing my final high school English paper of the semester.

"So, when are you and the Chief going on your next date?"

"Date? Bella, if I didn't know any better, I would say you were jealous of my relationship with your father."

"Of course I'm jealous. He gets to spend quality time with you, while _I_ only get to see you in that awful visitation room. Don't get me wrong – I'm glad you and Charlie are hanging out; his attitude towards you has improved tremendously. I just wish he would let me tag along on your little adventures."

Edward chuckled.

"God, Bella, that would be awesome. But it's never gonna happen. And don't keep pushing the issue. If you piss off Charlie then he may stop allowing you to see me."

He had a point. I hated being separated from Edward and I didn't want to risk our precious visitation time, but I didn't know how I was going to make it till his twenty-first birthday.

All the couples wandering the halls at Forks High took each other for granted. What I wouldn't give to be able to stroll the hallways confidently while holding Edward's hand. His body would be warm and protective at my side, and I would actually look forward to attending school just to see his perfect face every day. I sighed, knowing that would never happen.

Not wanting to ruin the few minutes left I had with my love, we spent the rest of the call flirting and laughing.

After hanging up, I began diligently working on my term paper. The semester was coming to a close; only two weeks remained before we would be out for Christmas break. Exams would be starting next week, and I had a lot of work to do to prepare.

Edward was also extremely busy. He had his own finals to study for and was spending extra hours tutoring his fellow inmates, helping them prepare for their exams.

With Christmas quickly approaching, I was at a complete loss as to what to get Edward. He was really excited about his upcoming internship with Dr. Cullen, and I wondered if I could buy him a nice watch or briefcase or something.

He considered this opportunity with Dr. Cullen to be vital to his future. He knew that if he made a good impression, he would have excellent references for medical school, and he was quite nervous about proving his mettle. I, on the other hand, had no doubt he would charm the socks off those doctors. Any guy who could make Charlie Swan like him while dating me at the same time had to have mad dazzling skills.

The detention center had extended visiting hours during the holidays and I hoped Charlie would let me enjoy an extra long visit with Edward, much like he did at Thanksgiving.

That visit had turned out wonderfully. Alice, Rose, Jasper, and I had visited Edward together, bringing a festive Thanksgiving meal with us. We had shared an awesome time playing monopoly when we were not gorging ourselves on turkey and sweet potatoes.

"_Guys, I can't thank you enough for dinner. This was amazing. This was probably the best Thanksgiving I've ever had, and that's pretty sad considering I'm sitting in a juvenile detention center."_

_Jasper removed his lips from Alice's for a moment to reply._

"_Come on Masen. You know we wouldn't force you to endure the shiteous chow from the cafeteria today – that's just un-American. Besides, this place holds a special place in my heart. Had I not gotten locked up, I would never have met you, and _you_ were the one who gave me the kick in the balls I needed when it came to Alice. So, it's my pleasure to give back a little bit."_

_Jasper kissed Alice softly on the forehead. They were nauseating with their constant PDA._

_The monopoly game was slow going because the two couples at the table were constantly distracted by one another. I know I was more into the sweet caresses from Edward's hands on my body than I was into the game. Alice was perched on Jasper's lap, where they spoke in baby-talk much of the time. Their syrupy-sweet dialogue was actually quite aggravating, but I figured Edward and I were equally ridiculous. _

_Rose was becoming increasingly annoyed by our revolting couples behavior, threatening us all with bodily harm on more than one occasion. I could tell that the strain from being the lone single in our group of friends was really starting to bother her. I made a mental note to find an eligible bachelor for my dear friend._

_I never guessed the answer to my prayers would walk into the visitation room not ten minutes later._

"_Get your filthy paws off my sister, Hale. Don't make me put your scrawny ass back in lock up."_

_Alice leapt off Jasper's lap and returned to her own chair._

"_Hello big brother," she grumpily retorted. _

"_Hi Emmett!" I squealed and jumped up to give the handsome correctional officer a hug. "Happy Thanksgiving." _

_He rewarded me with his trademark, dimpled smile. _

"_Happy Thanksgiving to you too, Isabella. Glad to see you are taking care of young Mr. Masen here."_

_Edward glanced up at Emmett. "Hey Officer Cullen. So nice of you to mingle among the commoners."_

"_Funny, Masen. Keep working on your routine and maybe you'll be ready for a real audience when you get released." _

_He walked over and thumped Edward on the back._

_Emmett's eyes swept across the table, frowning when they reached Alice and Jasper. "Hey, little sis. It's good to see you, even if your choice of boyfriends leaves something to be desired."_

_Though Rose generally hated Jasper's guts, she never allowed anyone else to badmouth him._

"_Don't talk about my brother that way, Cullen. As if you have any room to talk! You were quite the deviant at Forks high, so just shut your trap."_

_Emmett stared at Rose with a confused expression._

"_Rosie? Is that you?"_

"_Of course it's me, you big oaf. Who the hell else did you expect?"_

_Emmett's lips parted with a newfound appreciation as he eyed her sexy curves. "I'm not sure, but hell, the last time I saw you, you had braces and big hair. It was when I had to take you three to the N'Sync concert when you were in junior high. God that was horrible. I'm still having nightmares over that experience."_

_Rose laughed. "Me too. I _hated_ N'Snyc. My parents made me go, because they wouldn't let Jasper go by himself, and then Alice wanted to tag along. Boy bands are the devil."_

"_Wait a minute," Edward cut in. "Jasper wanted to see N'sync? In concert? And not to impress a girl?" He turned to his former fellow inmate. "Bro, I don't know if I can be your friend anymore. I thought it was a mistake when I found their songs on your iPod, but it seems you have a serious problem when it comes to music. This makes me want to tell you 'bye, bye, bye'!"_

_The entire table erupted in laughter. Japer hadn't spoken a word and his face was crimson._

"_Shut the fuck up, you guys. I was a kid. I was entitled to like crappy music."_

_The rest of the visit was spent mocking Jasper's infatuation with Justin Timberlake. The other families in the visitation room must have thought we had snuck in some alcohol, judging by how much we were laughing._

_Both Edward and I noticed that Emmett and Rose's eyes kept finding their way to each other. They seemed to be speaking without words, and Rose's blush told me that she enjoyed the older man's attention very much._

_As our time with Edward came to an end, Emmett said his goodbyes, but before walking away, he paused to speak to Rose._

"_It was a pleasure to see you again, Rosalie. I hope our paths cross again before five more years pass."_

_He winked and walked away._

"_What was that?" Alice asked._

"_What was what?" Rose replied._

"_Rose, my brother was totally hitting on you."_

"_No, he wasn't. He was just being nice."_

"_That was more than just nice. He basically eye-fucked you across the table."_

"_Whatever, Alice."_

_I spoke up. "Actually, I agree with Alice. I think there was definitely some silent flirting going on between the two of you."_

_Rose pretended to disagree, but I could see the underlying giddiness on her face. It was the same look I had when I thought of Edward. She was smitten._

Rose was intensely private when it came to matters of the heart, so I had to rely on Alice to keep me updated on the Rose/Emmett situation. She did mention that Emmett asked about Rose and that he had started making more appearances in Forks lately. Other than that, she wasn't sure if anything was going on between the two. It was quite the mystery, but I knew Rose would eventually slip and let us know if she was talking to Emmett.

Exams passed without a hitch. My grades were above and beyond Charlie's requirements to date Edward, and that was a relief. Edward finished his first semester of community college with a 4.0 GPA. He modestly didn't say much about his perfect performance, though I could tell he was thrilled when he rushed to register for four spring semester classes the second he found out his grades.

He had complained of boredom since classes had ended and I had mailed him a few books to get him through the semester break.

I had begged Charlie to let me visit Edward for Christmas, but he declined, explaining that he wanted us to spend time together as a family. Beyond disappointed, I hadn't been able to hide my tears. However, I didn't argue with my father. He had been really cool about things with Edward and me recently, and I didn't want to risk infuriating him, thereby screwing myself in the process. Charlie promised we would visit Edward together the day after Christmas. The delay sucked, but at least I wouldn't have to mail him his gift.

I staged my own personal boycott on Christmas morning by hiding in my room until Charlie forced me to come downstairs at ten.

"Come on Bells. Get your ass down here. Your breakfast is getting cold. Don't make me send your presents back to the North Pole!"

I rolled my eyes at that comment. He was so lame.

I quickly washed my face and brushed my teeth before going downstairs. Dad was in the kitchen, scooping out the breakfast casserole I had put together the night before. He was in a white dress shirt and a green tie covered in reindeer.

"Nice tie."

"Thanks. You gave it to me when you were eight."

"Really? Huh. Do you have a hot date later or something?"

I was confused. Charlie never dressed up. He was definitely a t-shirt and jeans kind of guy.

"No, we have that Christmas party at the Cullens later. Remember?"

I hadn't remembered. Charlie had mentioned it earlier in the week, but I had been so absorbed by pouting over a Christmas without Edward that I had forgotten.

"Oh, that's right. That should be fun."

At least I would get to hang out with Alice.

We ate the rest of our breakfast in silence. All I could think of was how lonely Edward must have been today – all locked up with no presents to open. My appetite was ruined.

We opened our gifts. Charlie was thrilled with his new tackle box and gift certificate to Newton's Outfitters. I was shocked by Charlie's gift for me – a small digital camera with a 10x zoom.

"Awesome, Dad. Thanks."

"I'm glad you like it. I know you mentioned you didn't have any pictures of Edward, so I thought you could use that on your next visit. Maybe Emmett could take a photo of the two of you or something."

"That's an excellent idea, Dad. This is really great."

The rest of the morning flew by as I got ready for the Christmas shindig at Alice's. I didn't really own anything festive, and hoped a red sweater with my jeans would be Christmasy enough. Honestly, my dad's tie was enough for both of us. Enough for all of Forks, really.

We made the short drive to the Cullens and we patiently waited for the front door to open. Carlisle answered, stepping forward to shake Charlie's hand and squeezing me in a hug, followed by a kiss on my cheek. Carlisle was ultra hot for a dad and I blushed furiously as Alice chuckled in the background. I had made the mistake of admitting that I found her adoptive father rather attractive, and she had no intentions of letting me forget that.

Alice took our coats, ushering us into their impressive living room. There we were greeted by Esme and Emmett. Rosalie and Jasper would be arriving later, as well as several other guests.

I looked around the lavish room and took in all the holiday decorations. A giant Christmas tree stood next to a stone fireplace. It was beautifully decorated in deep reds and golds. A plethora of gifts lay underneath.

I gasped as I looked to the left of the tree. There by the fireplace in a dress shirt and black slacks stood my Edward.

"Merry Christmas, Bella."

**I know... What a crappy place to end it. I'm already working on the next chapter and it should be up soon. Maybe Bella and Edward can find a moment alone...**

**Ok.. I'm so sorry for the long delay. I've got work, kids, hubs, life, etc. It can get in the way of updating. I promise I am not ever going to abandon this fic. I will finish it. *Scouts honor!***

**I have an amazing beta. She's pbswimmer and she has a new fic. It's called Mimiteh, and it kicks ass. It's a canon, alternate New Moon. Go check this fic out. It will be worth your time! On Twilighted, it's **.?sid=8730 and here on fanfiction it's .net/s/5523830/1/Mimiteh. **Go show my girl some love.**

**Also, I wrote a smutty Visitation one shot and it's called Extra Visitation. Look on my profile and check it out. There will be additional updates for the lovely ladies who purchased me for the Support Stacie auction. Thanks again to ****LaTuaCantante4him and ILRPinkGirl for their generous donation.**

**Thank you so much for all the reviews, adds, pms, etc. I cherish each and every one of you and though I have been fail at responding, know that I adore you all. xoxo  
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	16. Chapter 16

**My sincere apologies for the long delay. **

**Thank you so much to everyone for their support. Your comments and reviews are like Christmas gifts. I cherish each of them.**

**Special thanks to the best beta ever. pbswimmer, you complete me. Check out her fic. It's called Mimiteh and it's on my faves.  
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**Now onto Jailward's Christmas. Enjoy.  
**

The cold of winter had arrived to Washington, leaving behind autumn's bright colors and longer days.

Things had been surprisingly good for me in Meyer. Well, as good as being locked up can be. The holiday season was now upon us and I felt excited for Christmas for the first time since my mother had been alive.

Bella and I would both be on break from school until January. We had aced our respective classes and she had recently received her acceptance letter to the University of Washington in Seattle. She was thrilled, not even waiting two days before mailing off her deposit to secure her spot in next year's class. I had encouraged her to consider other options, but she was determined to stay close to me. I couldn't say I minded that decision.

She would be only a short ride away from me, come August, and I looked forward to the prospect of seeing her twice a week. If my plans came to fruition, I would be joining her at UW the following year. I would still be incarcerated, but if I continued having success in my online classes then I could earn the privilege of attending classes on campus as well. The thought of walking side-by-side with her in the quad or holding her hand at the library filled me with eager anticipation.

Thanksgiving had been surprisingly awesome. The whole gang had come to Meyer to spend time with me, making it go down as one of my best holidays on record. The only downside was the lack of any time alone with Bella, but we had both kept a hand on each other, and that would have had to be enough.

I was still attending therapy though it was far from my favorite activity. Dr. Jen was patient as I attempted to dodge her questions about my past. However, her gentle nudges to talk about the sexual abuse were slowly starting to get through. I still wasn't ready, but I was getting closer. Thankfully she was eager to learn more about Bella and I never had trouble talking about her. I couldn't say that therapy was necessarily helping, but Chief Swan had really wanted me to try it out and I would never go against the Chief.

Speaking of Bella's dad, I was actually starting to like the man. The tough-guy persona he initially portrayed turned out to be a far cry from the real Charlie Swan. He was kind and patient, loving his daughter with a fierce protectiveness that rivaled my own feelings for Bella. He was a good man — I had never spent time with someone who was so genuinely compassionate.

He told me how hard it had been to miss out on Bella's childhood. While she had lived with her mother, Chief Swan had mentored at-risk youth to satisfy his parenting urges (though it wasn't the same as the fulfillment of Bella actually living with him now). One of those at-risk youth had been Emmett.

Chief Swan and I were hanging out in the visitation room a few weeks ago and I was moaning with pleasure as I inhaled the burritos he had brought from Taco Bell. We discussed Emmett's apparent crush on Rosalie Hale. Emmett and Rosalie had become reacquainted with one another when everyone had visited me over Thanksgiving.

"_Chief, can you believe he's got a thing for a high school girl? Isn't he like twenty-five or something? Can't you arrest him for that?" I snickered as I wiped hot sauce from my mouth._

"_Only if he takes their relationship to a more, ahem, intimate level. Once she's eighteen, they are free to do what they want. Rosalie is a pretty girl. I can see why he's got a crush on her. I'll remind him to behave like a gentleman with her."_

"_No! Don't tell him anything. He will kill me if he knows I've told you. I just think it's funny. He keeps pleading with me to ask Bella things about Rose. I find it humorous that he's an officer of the law, using an inmate to gather info on the girl he likes. It's like a bad sitcom."_

"_Well, I'm sure Rose will be at the Cullen's Christmas party and if I see them together, I'll talk to Emmett then. I'm not too worried about it. That Rosalie can hold her own. She sent Tyler Crowley to the hospital a few years ago when he grabbed her inappropriately."_

_I stopped chewing for a moment._

"_The hospital? What did she do, break his nose or something?"_

_Charlie shook his head._

"_He needed testicular retrieval surgery. He was out of school for a few weeks."_

_I dropped my burrito on the table, my hands protectively darting to my groin._

"_Oh God! That hurts just thinking about it. Remind me to never piss off Rosalie!"_

_Charlie chuckled a bit._

"_Just remember that when you are spending time with Bella. Bad things happen when young men don't keep their hands to themselves. Maybe I taught Rose the move she used to subdue Mr. Crowley."_

_I gasped._

"_And I'm sure I could do more damage."_

_It was a good reminder that even though Charlie and I were becoming friends, I was still dating his daughter. I was pretty sure he wouldn't actually hurt me, but I had no plans on testing that theory._

Chief Swan came to see me every week and on a later date he picked me up so I could accompany him to some "Shop with a Cop" thing he did every Christmas.

Apparently he was involved in a program that paired police officers with children who lived in poverty in order to give the kids a halfway-decent Christmas. He had invited me to come along and we were going to take a boy named Jeremiah to Target. Charlie said we had $200 to spend on the kid.

I was standing at the visitation desk when Charlie and a small Native American kid came into the lobby. He was tiny, with shaggy dark hair that covered his ears and fell into his eyes. It was hard to believe that the scrawny tike was eight years old, and he appeared to be awe-struck upon entering the detention center.

"Edward, this is Jeremiah. Jeremiah, this is Edward. Now let's go shopping."

I smiled down at the little kid and he looked up at me, his eyes huge.

"Are you in prison?"

I wasn't sure how to answer that. "Um . . . well, I guess so."

"Whoa — I've never met a criminal before. Did you rob a bank?"

I definitely didn't want to tell the kid I had killed three men. I was afraid it might freak him out.

"Well, I …"

Thankfully, Charlie cut me off.

"Edward got in a fight to protect a friend. End of story."

Charlie's words had an air of finality and Jeremiah nodded. "Okay, Chief Swan."

"And let that be a lesson to you, young man," he advised, putting his arm around the small boy. "Violence is never the answer."

I followed behind them and Charlie looked over his shoulder, aiming a sad smile in my direction.

I had never actually been in a Target before. The closest one had been in Seattle and my foster parents had never been willing to take us that far. I was overwhelmed by the giant department store which seemed hipper and cooler than Walmart.

Jeremiah was a sweet kid, babbling non-stop about himself. He told us he lived on the Quileute reservation in La Push. He had three sisters, and his dad had recently been injured in a logging accident, forcing him to stop working. It had been a rough year for his family and he was eager to try to make things better by getting presents for his parents and siblings.

We hit every corner of the store, buying earrings for his mom and a thermal shirt for his dad. He was the only boy in the family and we had to ask a couple of teenage girls to help us find things for his sisters. After learning more than I ever wanted to know about makeup and girly pajamas, we found some items he thought his sisters would like.

"All right, kid. What about yourself? What do _you_ want for Christmas?"

"I'm not sure. Maybe some new jeans? This is my only pair and they're too small — they're shrinking my junk."

Charlie looked disturbed by Jeremiah's comment but I just chuckled.

We headed to the clothing section and helped Jeremiah pick out and try on clothes. There were some good holiday sales, allowing us to get him quite a few items and stay within our budget.

I was surprised as Charlie pulled me aside and told me to go look for some clothes for myself.

"You need to make a good impression on your hospital internship."

I glanced down at the faded jeans that were a little too long and the cotton hoodie that was a little too worn. Charlie patted me on my shoulder and said he would wait outside the dressing room.

I found a couple pairs of khakis and few shirts that seemed to look professional enough, I hoped.

"Thank you, Chief Swan." I nervously placed my purchases in the cart, feeling embarrassed that I could not afford them myself.

"You're welcome, kid. And call me Charlie, please."

"Thank you Charlie."

We both noticed Jeremiah eyeing a remote control car on display near the registers.

We asked him if he wanted anything from the toy section, and he shrugged, saying he really needed a new backpack.

He reminded me so much of myself when I had been in foster care. A new pair of shoes or a jacket that wasn't a hand-me-down had been much more important than a toy. It became all about the necessities when you didn't have any money.

Charlie handed me a few bills and whispered instructions in my ear.

"Edward, can you watch Jeremiah for a minute? I need to hit the head."

"No problem, Chief. I'll get us a spot in line."

The checkout lines were pretty packed, and as we stood in line, I distracted Jeremiah with all the magazines on display. In particular, I showed him some photos from a fishing magazine favored by Charlie. Like me, Jeremiah had never been fishing before.

The cashier began ringing up our order and I was relieved when Charlie arrived just in time to pay the bill. He had given me the $200, but my clothes had pushed it well above that. He graciously paid the difference and we walked out to the car.

We had lunch at a local pizzeria, where I was a total glutton, making four trips to the buffet. Charlie just laughed and Jeremiah looked impressed by the sheer volume of food I consumed. I've learned that you have to take advantage of good food when you have the opportunity.

All in all, it was a good day and I was so grateful to be a part of this kid's Christmas. Charlie explained that he would deliver the secretly purchased remote control car to the boy's parents, so Jeremiah would have a surprise on Christmas morning. As I mentioned before, Charlie Swan was a total softie.

Charlie said "Be safe, son," as he walked me back into the detention center.

For just a moment I let myself pretend that I was his son. I envied the unconditional love Charlie had for Bella. I had never wanted a dad more in my life.

There were no shiny presents or the smell of muffins and quiche when I woke up on Christmas morning. In fact, it was no different than any other day at Meyer. I received the typical growls and dark stares from the other inmates as I made my way to breakfast. Juvie wasn't Disney Land.

On holidays like today, Meyer allowed for extended visitation. Basically, visiting hours lasted all day, and parents could also be escorted to visit an inmate in his room. I noticed several sets of parents carrying gifts to deliver to their wayward sons.

I was nervous and excited because Charlie had worked things out so that I could spend the day with Cullens. They were having their annual holiday party, naturally inviting Charlie and Bella. I couldn't wait to see Bella and actually spend time with her outside the detention center.

I had made it a point never to ask Chief Swan if he could invite Bella along on our mentoring trips. It just seemed rude, and honestly I was afraid I might piss him off and make him keep Bella away from me. We really didn't talk about Bella much at all during our time together. I did, however, need Charlie's help when it came to getting Bella a Christmas gift. They didn't have shopping malls in prison, and I didn't have any money to buy her anything even if they did.

I had considered making her something. We had a pretty decent woodshop and an art department. Unfortunately, I learned that I was skilled neither with power tools nor a paintbrush, so I had to think outside the box.

I certainly didn't want Charlie to go to a store and buy something for me. I knew that all girls liked jewelry, but I wanted to personally pick out and pay for the first piece of jewelry she would receive from me.

Luckily, Emmett had a great idea. He knew how much I worried for Bella's safety, especially since I wasn't around to help her if she found herself in trouble. He suggested having Charlie enroll her in self-defense classes. When I brought this idea up to Charlie, he thought it was an amazing suggestion and he seemed so impressed that I would want Bella to protect herself just as much as he did. He said he would throw in some pepper spray as well.

It wasn't a perfect gift, but it's the thought that counts, right? I would be sure to find something really romantic for Valentine's day or something.

Emmett had been scheduled to work the overnight shift at Meyer so he came to take me to his house around mid morning. Because he was one of the few officers that didn't have kids, he had generously offered to stay late to give someone the chance to be with their families on Christmas morning.

"Ready to go, Masen?" he called out as he entered my room.

"Yeah, I'm ready."

I wore one of my newly acquired outfits and followed him to the visitation area, where it took longer than it should have to sign out. The officers enjoyed putting the fear of God in me before I left the correction facility. The truth was that I was the farthest thing from a flight risk — they wouldn't have allowed me into the mentorship program otherwise.

The long ride to Forks was fairly quiet. Emmett was tired from a long night of working, and I was trying not to act too excited at the prospect of sneaking a few kisses from Bella. I figured Charlie would be watching us like a hawk and I knew we would have to be extra stealthy if we wanted a moment alone.

We were greeted by Emmett's parents before we had a chance to exit the car. Carlisle shook my hand and then introduced me to his wife, Esme.

"Merry Christmas, Edward! It's so good to finally meet you. I've heard so much about you, dear. I couldn't bear the thought of you spending Christmas in that wretched place. Consider this your home away from Meyer."

She pulled me in for a hug and held me tight as she placed a kiss on my cheek.

"If you are anything like my Emmett, then you are probably famished. I've got lunch ready, so come on in."

The Cullen's house was the biggest home I had ever seen. I had lived in a group home with ten other boys and that house was less than half the size of the Cullen mansion. I immediately felt out of place and overwhelmed by their obvious wealth.

Esme comfortingly put her arm around me and ushered me to the kitchen.

"I'll give you a tour of the house after we eat."

We sat down for a lunch of homemade vegetable soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. There would be a lot of food available for the party later, so we were having what Esme called a "light lunch".

Emmett left to take a nap before the party started and Esme showed me the rest of the house. They had their own library! I mean, who had an actual library in their house? It was pretty cool. My favorite part of the house was the game room. There was a pool table, foosball, and even a combined Mrs. Pacman / Galaga arcade game.

On the wall was the largest television I had ever seen. Esme handed me the remote and told me to relax. The other guests wouldn't arrive for a couple hours.

I honestly hadn't watched television since I had been arrested. We had a TV lounge at Meyer, but I was still low man on the totem pole and the guys who had been there longer had authority over what was to be watched. I've never been a social creature, so I usually just stayed in my room.

I fell asleep watching some action movie and was startled awake by excited female voices.

"Edward! Merry Christmas!"

Before I knew it I was sandwiched in between Rose and Alice on the plush leather couch of the game room. They were bouncing up and down telling me all about their morning. Alice had gone over to Rose and Jasper's before I had arrived, and she insisted on giving me every last detail.

I heard a chuckle and looked back to see Jasper leaning against a pin ball machine.

"I can't believe they actually let your ass out for the day. They wouldn't even let me out to go to my grandpa's funeral, but they let your ass out to spend Christmas with your girl . . . unbelievable."

"Jasper, shut up. That funeral was in Texas. You weren't allowed to leave the state, dumbass."

"Eddie boy knows I'm just giving him shit, Rose."

He walked over and pulled me off the couch.

"Good to see ya, man. Merry Christmas."

"Jasper Fricken Hale. Meyer's not the same without you."

"I'm surprised the place can survive without me. Come on Edward, let me school you in the fine art of billiards."

"Oh, I think it is _you_ who will be schooled, Jazz."

Jasper and I played several games of pool, while the girls left to do girly things. Jasper was genuinely shocked that I continually kicked his ass. One of my foster homes had actually had a pool table and boredom had forced me to spend many an hour playing by myself. I had gotten pretty good. He suggested we become pool hustlers when I got out of Meyer. I loved Jasper, but he sure could be an idiot.

We were interrupted by Esme hollering that the other guests would be arriving any minute. I knew that meant Bella and Charlie, so I was about to head downstairs when Alice grabbed me and pulled me into her room.

Before I knew what happened, I was suddenly dressed in a pair of swanky black pants, the softest dress shirt I had ever felt, and a pair of black leather dress shoes. How Alice knew my size, I'd never know. Rose ooohed and aaahhhed over my appearance. Then they attacked my hair with some gel. Alice wanted to pluck my eyebrows, but that was where I drew the line. When they were finished, I checked myself out in the mirror and I almost didn't recognize the kid staring back at me. _Now_ I was ready to see my Bella.

I helped Esme make final preparations in the kitchen when the doorbell rang.

"Chief Swan is here!" Carlisle yelled.

Eager to surprise Bella, Charlie had wanted to keep my presence at the party a secret. I had almost blown it on the phone last week, but had managed to change the subject somewhat smoothly.

I made my way towards the Cullen's gigantic Christmas tree and stood silently as I listened to Carlisle and Esme greet the Swans. My heart fluttered with excitement hearing Bella's soft voice. I kept shifting my weight from one foot to the other in anticipation.

And then I she walked into my line of vision. If it were possible, she was more beautiful than the last time I saw her. She wore a tight fitting sweater and dark jeans. I let my eyes drift down her body to take in her soft curves. Damn, she was sexy. I felt somewhat guilty for checking her out without her knowledge, but hey, I was a seventeen year-old guy.

When she turned towards me and met my eyes, the shock and pleasure in her gaze made me feel incredible. She immediately smiled and ran towards me, leaping into my arms.

"Edward. I can't believe you are really here. All I wanted for Christmas was you."

She found my lips with her own, and forgetting where we were, I opened my mouth to her, tasting mint on her tongue. The kiss quickly became anything but chaste and only Charlie's gruff, "Ahem" broke us out of our moment.

"Masen, don't think I won't load you into my squad car and drive you back to Meyer."

I looked away from Charlie's annoyed expression and glanced around the room. Grabbing Bella, I took two big steps towards the mantle over the grandiose fireplace.

"See, Charlie?" I countered, pointing to the green sprig of leaves hanging on the mantle. "Mistletoe. I can't just go and break a sacred Christmas tradition."

Charlie growled and walked away, mumbling, "Mistletoe my ass."

The Cullen's Christmas party was everything I could have hoped for. The food was first-class and the conversations were enjoyable. Most importantly, I spent the entire evening with the love of my life. I couldn't remember a better evening. _This_ was surely my best holiday ever.

Charlie kept a pretty close eye on Bella and I worried that we wouldn't get a moment alone. Thankfully, Emmett saved the day.

"You owe me, Masen," he whispered as he walked by us heading towards Charlie.

"Chief. You've gotta see the new ride Carlisle and Esme got me for Christmas. It's fully restored and amazing."

Emmett had finally gotten the classic mustang he had wanted since he had first received his driver's license. I knew Charlie couldn't resist, and the moment Charlie, Carlisle, and Emmett left for the garage, I made my move.

"Come on Bella, let's go upstairs."

We jogged up the stairs and I headed directly for the game room. Unfortunately, Jasper and Alice were already there, dry humping on the black leather couch.

"Damn it," I grumbled.

"The library's empty!" Alice called out breathily.

I didn't need to be told twice, so I snatched Bella's hand and led her to the library.

We entered and shut the door behind us. I knew we only had a few minutes before Charlie would be looking for us. I had to make it count.

"I love you," I whispered, taking Bella's earlobe between my teeth.

"Oh Edward, I love you too. More than anything."

I began kissing my way down her neck, brushing my lips along her clavicle. Her skin was so soft, so smooth, and her taste was heavenly. When she whimpered, her audible response to my actions went straight to my groin.

Her hands snaked up my arms and she cradled my face, pulling me down to her mouth. We began kissing passionately, a frantic explosion of lips, teeth, and tongue. I had never been kissed this way and I couldn't stop myself from sliding my hands to her ass to pull her against my erection. I parted her legs with my thigh and ground into her, both of us moaning at the friction.

Bella began rubbing herself against me and I walked us forward until her back was against the library door.

It was as if our bodies had melded into one and I had never felt such a level of arousal or pleasure.

"Oh God, Edward," Bella gasped as she suckled my neck.

I felt my control slipping and I knew I needed to rein things in. I wanted my time alone with Bella to be more than a horny romp in at a friend's house.

I reluctantly moved my leg from between hers and slowed my kisses. I took my hands from her rear and moved them up to her face, cupping her cheeks as I continued to kiss her.

"Tonight was perfect; you are perfect," I whispered.

"I can't believe you and Charlie surprised me. This was the best gift I could have ever received."

"Mmm hmm," I nodded as I kissed her chin.

"If I had known you would be here, I would have brought your Christmas present."

"Bella, being here with you, and knowing that you love me . . . that is the only gift I'll ever want."

"I'll never stop loving you, Edward. Never."

I felt myself tear up as I kissed her softly.

"I'm going to hold you to that, my love."

We spent the next ten minutes engrossed in each other. I held her tightly as we kissed and professed our love over and over. Perfection was the only word to describe my time with Bella.

Frustrated that the time was short, we straightened our clothes and hair, and reluctantly returned to the game room. Jasper and Alice had finished their make-out session as well and were setting up the instruments to play Rock Band on the Wii. We joined the game, having a wonderful time with our friends.

All too soon I was on my way back to Meyer where the only thing waiting for me was cold walls and loneliness.

**I hope it was worth the wait.**

**Thanks for taking the time to read my little ficcy. I appreciate you all so much!**

**Reviews are love. :)**

**My rec for the day is Just Wait by InstantKarmaGirl. It's so angsty and painful and just awesome. Check it out.  
**


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